Goodbye

[candid]

Anon, 47 is a picture of a dried up lake bed. Not a pretty picture. But as with every change in Yi, there is course of action or an attitude which can make the best of even the most distressing or oppressive circumstances. In this case that action or attitude is to stand firmly in your resolve to overcome oppression and finding the remaining cheerfulness within your reserves. It takes courage to remain cheerful despite outward circumstances, but future happiness rests upon a positive disposition.

I don't know whether Yi provided this as an answer to whether she is feeling oppressed or whether its directed to your own sense of inner oppression, but the outcome either way is dependent upon overcoming the oppression inwardly.

Hang in there.

[pedro]

Trust me mate, Ive been there, and the only oppression you need to deal with is your own, that of thinking you can find love outside yourself, or that someone will bring you the unity that you desire

Even if your goal is getting her back to you, it will do you more good to realise you dont need her, and that may be your only chance as well

We get people to love us not by chasing them, but by openning ourselves to their love, by getting receptive and deserving of it; you can also think that whatever you need from her (or whomever), you can only get by offering it to her (or whomever)

Be in peace

[rinda]

Anon-

You are in a tough spot, Anon, you have my best wishes.

Rinda

[pedro]

a few more thoughts from a fellow sufferer


love... pain...

why should these words always come associated?

I tell you why, because human love is just a craving like any other, and as such it cannot achieve more than reinforcing the ego, and distracting us from where the real joy lies waiting

there really is no substitute for God's love, and the second best option is never going to be completely rewarding; we make sure it doesnt, by setting such high standards that not even the award winning girlfriend of the year would cope

but we need not give up love if it still means so much to us, after all, we need give up nothing, God himself promised us that

we just need to be more honest; for instance, if you love her, then it should be no problem doing what's best for her, even if that means leaving her alone. So, are you good for her? Is she better off? or doesnt she see what she's missing

Love either is or isnt, and we cannot make someone love us against her will; we can just change ourselves and allow ourselves to be loved (and it isnt just wishful thinking)

and also doing what is best for you.. is she really what you need, what you deserve? Do you really love her so much or are you just pretending you do, in order to avoid dealing with your REAL need?
...

but dont just sit there feeling miserable, if you really want her then fight for her! women dont like us to give up, even when they say so; but they dont like to be chased either, unless theyre in control of the chase, which means letting them lead, always being receptive and dedicated (I know: it sucks! but thats just the way it is)

after all it isnt so hard to figure what women want: they want to be loved for what they are, and not for what we're after (ok, I'll spell it in case someone missed it: its sex)

its an ilusive science, that of giving and taking away in balance; its more effective when we're not just thinking about ourselves but try to see it through their eyes; its more of a making ready of ourselves, than trying to get it by force, or emotional blackmail or whatever

women dont like wimps, much less those that fall appart at any little distress; your lady will respect you more if you follow your path proudly, than if you chase her like a puppy or recoil in depression

61 and 31 are good lessons to be learned

and remember, 47 does not mean that the situation is beyond hope, that it is exhausted (even then, 47 shows the way to overcome the exhaustion, its a test of the character); 47 just means that you see it as hopeless, you are the one who is exhaust, and you know what? women dont like exhausted guys

so dont you just give up the fight, but hang tight instead, without renouncing your goal (if thats your thing), and you'll see new ways of letting the river flow in the future

its all mental, so if we correct our minds, everything is corrected

in any case, I think she needs a rest, so you better leave her to her thoughts by now, make the best of yourself (thats the test of 47), show your qualities, and just receptively hint her of how much she is missing

and even if that is really the end of it, remember: where there's an end, there is also a beginning, so just stand proud and walk towards your destiny

I wish you well

[rinda]

Pedro,

This note is a treasure! I'm inspired to begin a personal "Book of Days". Thank you for sharing your thoughts so openly.

Rinda