hello - hex 5-39 and 14-50

[em ching]

Hello all,

Feeling a bit low on the confidence stakes/ shaken re. my social skills again today (yawn) despite feeling happy in that arena recently (wish emotions weren't so transient and fickle!), So I asked :

How can I remain cheerful?
And got Hex 5 Waiting to 39 Obstruction - maybe thay're saying I must wait till this inndr obstruction of mine ceases rearing its ugly head of self doubt making me one unstable and dependent person!? How though, can you get rid of stupid negative thought patterns!?

Then I asked advice regarding an event tomorrow night which I'm a bit nervous about because I want it to be good and I want to be able to hold my own and have fun! But I'm worried that given my current feelings that I'll be all reserved and shut off;
And got 14 'Possession in Great Measure' to 50 The Well'...

Would very much appreciate what you think the oracle is trying to tell me here, I guess I need to accept that humans are basically unstable.. I just wish I could remain self-assured for longer than I do!!

Thanks :rolleyes:

[trojan]

Seems to me you might have a pretty strict expectations of how you should and shouldn't be and don't trust that you are perfectly okay just as you are, warts, obsessions and all ;)

Seems like you are always checking yourself out of the corner of your own (very critical) eye for mess ups. Maybe it might help to stop judging yourself so harshly. You judge yourself for lack of confidence quite harshly which may not help much in the end seeing as that insecure part of you could probably do with not being made to feel any worse.

I'm saying 'always' here just going on the tone of the last few threads you posted and I'm making a few assumptions too but thats humans for you.....

I think your readings might reflect this. 39 acknowledges things are a bit of a struggle at the moment. Maybe things seem at an impasse, blocked. 39.1 don't press forward too hard or use force on your self. 39.2 don't blame yourself ! Quite literally 39.2 says you are not to blame here. How can you feel cheerful if you blame and berate yourself ? Hex 5, waiting, often refers to chilling and taking time out while things sort themselves out. Not much to do in hex 5 except eat drink and enjoy yourself, remaining confident that what you need will come in time. And even if you don't feel confident don't worry about not feeling confident, lol, hex 5 does not recommend worry, quite the opposite

Re the reading for tomorrow night 14.1 to 50 seems like there is plenty for you at this event and no cause to worry - you meet with nothing harmful.

The old advice for social discomfort used to be focus your interest out to others at the party, get them to do the talking (and everyone loves talking about themselves lol) that way you'll forget your own perfomance, relax and before you know it you'll be enjoying yourself. If you monitor your every move all night you gonna feel restrained and restricted thats for sure .

Come to think of it this fits in withthe advice of hex 14 to give of yourself generously when you have much to give. So you must have much to give here


Anyhow 14-50 seems a good party vibe, if it is a party.

Have a good time :)

[willowfox]

Hex 5.1,2 > 39

The lines say just carry on as per usual with your life and certainly don't worry about what the future may hold, and remain absolutely calm at all times no matter what the situation you find yourself in, so never give in to panic.
Hex 39 says never give up in the face of difficulties, as it is down to you to find a solution, mind over matter.


Hex 14.1 > 50 Prepare yourself now for every eventuality, think what could go wrong and sort it out in your mind before the event, to be forewarned is to be forearmed.
Hex 50 you will see a transformation in yourself tomorrow as you have the ability to carry this off very successfully so don't worry, it will all turn out right on the night.

[trojan]

Oops sorry em ching I don't know how i managed to see 39 to 5 rather than 5 to 39 but perhaps there was a reason lol

[em ching]

Thanks both very much - Trojan your words especially struck a chord and I will endeavour to take up that advice tonight, and try not to worry about having a good time and just have one! If that makes sense...

:)

[ben_s]

You already got some great interpretations here, Em, so I'll comment off-oracle on a couple of things I'm learning that might help you too.

Keep in mind that the measure of success is in what we do, not in how we feel. If you're nervous, and do the right thing, you still win! Keep social score by how well you helped other people relax and have fun, not by how much you felt anxious about yourself. In fact it would be best to not need to keep score at all, but if you must, score yourself by how much opportunity your actions and words gave other people to feel good about their time with you.

One suggestion I saw to cure nervousness is to just go up and say Hi to five different strangers a day, for a week. Once you see that it's safe to say Hi, then strike up a five minute conversation with five strangers a day for the next week. Start off with a comment about something obvious like the weather, bus schedule, etc. Also, mention that you need to go in a few minutes - so they won't feel stuck. Then ask about them. These are all skills you can learn with practice. When you learn to drive, you overcome nervousness by repeated practice. You can build social skills the same way, just as you start to drive around a parking lot before you get on the highway.

[plupp]

Keep in mind that the measure of success is in what we do, not in [I]how we feel[/I

Sorry to interfere,but this was extremely well said! I am just walking around feeling about this and about that but rarely do I act upon those feelings! I must get the Yi wrong because to me it sounds like it is never speaking about taking action but more to have patience and persevere. Or for example when I get hex 7 even I can understand that it is about action but what kind of action? Not to go and make war? Sorry if I am stupid.And sorry em to speak about myself in your thread but what ben said was just so good.

[em ching]

Hello!

Yeah you're right plupp that's profound stuff (measure success by what you Do not how you feel because, dammit, feelings Are so transitory, temporary, fickle! thus shouldn't be taken so seriously! they pass like clouds :) (usually.)

Anyway I had a fab time I'd say! :D And thanks for the words they defo set me on the right track - it's such a good approach really - encourage eachother and put the other at ease can't go wrong! and that's what gave me most enjoyment during the evening I'd say.. I mean everyone wants positive encounters... but then again there Are difficult people.. but they'll learn once they get off their high horses ;)

Thanks again.

[trojan]

:) thanks for reporting back on the evening and glad it went well.