Hexagram 18, will he ever come back home?

[chicken]

Hi there everyone

I am new to this forum, and this is my first post!

I asked the question "Will my ex partner come home, is there any hope?" and drew hexagram 18. To me, it means that there is a chance, and that it would need work to repair the rot that has set in- which I would gladly and happily do. I understand my part in what has happened, and his too, all I wish for is to correct it all and get back together again.

The thing is though he has moved on in life, we have been apart for a couple of years now and it just seems like a miracle would have to occur for him to come back home, I love him very much, we have a lot of history, but am not so sure that the feeling is mutual any more

Any insight from you guys would be much appreciated

Thank you

[willowfox]

You separated from your partner for a reason, and that reason needs to be addressed and corrected before any further movement is possible.

After that you need to make contact to see how he feels about you. Humans are a difficult and stubborn species.

Repair is possible but would it last? Like fixing a hole in a wheel, how long before you get another hole?

[chicken]

Hi Willowfox, thank your reply

We are in regular contact but I know that now is not the right time to say anything some how. I think you made very good points about correcting the reasons why I left.

Correction of the past has been largely down to me, and my inability to deal with the situations that we were going through when we split. Ive since learned alot, and that working things out is far better than walking away... which is what I did. I just didnt know how to fix things up, my skills in life were so different then.

When future holes appear, I feel now that we can work through it, and that it isnt a dead end as I felt before.

[willowfox]

At this stage all you can do is try.

[ace]

I think WF has got this one.

I might add two small things.

18 has for me been about having to do something to correct a situation or an error, or that something or some perspective needs to be taken to correct/mend the situation. 18 is not a passive process of correction, but an active one. Hatcher (18) writes " many nouns abound here, just not enough verbs".

When I first read your question, I was struck by "come home". Then I read on, there was a couple of years of separation, and that he had or was moving on. I wondered to myself, perhaps he is already home, in his present life. Then, I wondered if the stagnation is about viewing the relationship through old perspectives. As in, wanting a return to a **new** way it was. Hatcher (18) writes, "some think that to fix things is to make them stay put". So, making current changes so **past** can live in the present may not work here. Hatcher (18) writes, "the decaying civilization cannot permit the experiments with styles of life which are poised to replace it". Perhaps, your perspective of the relationship has become trapped, trapped by hope for past times, and thus is blocking its present and future growth.

It does say that it is worthwhile to cross the great stream (undertake your task), however it might be useful to aerate your perspective, and turn the soil of the composting past. Hatcher (18) says, "without fresh air, no combustion".

[chicken]

Hi Ace, Willowfox,

Thank you for your insights, it really is a great help.

The old way definately needs an aeriating, I feel that some of this has been done by our time apart, but of course, there is always room for more.

We have both moved home since we were together, I used the words come home is because I feel that he is my soul mate, and home is where the heart is right?

I think I will keep him in mind, and maybe mention some thing to him when the time feels right, then I will know and I can either act to repair things, or accept that its a no go and get on I guess. Keep your fingers and toes crossed for me guys!

[chicken]

Hey there

I just wanted to update my thread, this morning my ex and I have had some discussion about the past problem which has been blocking our way. I mentioned that I was prepared to resolve anything he wishes, and that its crucial that we talk about things so that we can get on in future. It was a bit emotional for both of us when we left eachother [he rang me briefly not long after he had gone]

I asked the Iching about the situation in general, whats next for it and I got Hex 11.

This sounds positive to me, the way is open for me so that I can fix things for the better? so every one can benefit? I read about resolving fueds too, this would be completely correct as thats just what all of this has been.

I am sorry, I feel that its probably really hard for you guys to understand not knowing much of the story.

[willowfox]

H

I asked the I ching about the situation in general, whats next for it and I got Hex 11.

Well, you are trying like I said to do, now Hex 11 should usher in a time of peace between you.

[ace]

Hexagram 11 is quite lovely in this context. The energies of heaven and earth are moving towards each other, intermingling.

It seemed that you opened yourself and the situation to the active repairing of your first reading or 18. Through conversation and responsibility-taking, you aerated the situation, you created movement. Thus, now the energies can intermingle and interact.

[chicken]

Hi there both,

Well, you are trying like I said to do, now Hex 11 should usher in a time of peace between you.

I feel that my attempts to talk have definately helped, I was a bit muted before with worry about various things, your advice has helped me to talk though, so thank you for this Willowfox.

Hexagram 11 is quite lovely in this context. The energies of heaven and earth are moving towards each other, intermingling.

It certainly feels lovely, like a flower almost, thankyou Ace. I am looking forward to see what unfolds next. The impossible seems a lot more possible now