Hi all

After a relatively calm time and not casting and trusting my choices, I have reached a bit of a cross roads with my friend S. at work. I asked "Please show me a picture of my situation with S?" and drew 51.4.5 -> 3

I can see that this could be/is a shocking time if I was to lose her as a friend and the resulting work related problems, but I would like a bit of insight as how 3 fits in?

Thank you for any comments

Regards
Tom

Picture of 'your' situation with S -- 51.4.5 > 3 -- 51.4, 24.5, 3

51 A shock. Perhaps this cross roads is not what you expected. Perhaps you expected resolve after the difficulties with S.

51.4 There is a muddleness at your crossroad. It is muddy and mucky, and this is sticking to your proverbial boots. LISE (51.4) writes "only the soul can shine when the dirt is removed". Hatcher (51.4) writes "Sinking deeper into shock ... Now he insulates himself and tries to dull his senses, that all nasty shock might be muted".

51.5 At your crossroad, you go left there is trouble, you go right there is trouble. You and your muddy boots. Step to the side of the mud puddle that you are sinking in, onto "higher ground". Kick off your boots, and look again. Feel the solid ground under your feet. Not right, not left, but down the middle. Hatcher (51.5) writes about the image of a tight rope walker, "he does his business by going straight forward, calmly in concentration, along his narrow, middle path. His right and left are equally wrong and inferior as choices, but they are also equally useful in keeping his balance". LISE (51.5) writes about "new paths and insights", and having "the guts to enter new ventures, new and big challenges".

3 clearly show a difficult new beginning. Like the new sprout of grass that in order to find light, nourishment, and growth must break through packed soil, or find its way through the concrete of a sidewalk. The sprout has its intention, life, and struggles into being.

Tom, it looks like a positive pictures, assuming you kick off your muddy boots when you try to walk the high wire.

Hi Ace

Thank you for your response. That was an image of 51 I was getting but I am still really new to this and grasping in the dark I feel that there is a lot of mud, and that it is sticking so a nice analogy. I guess all I want at the moment is to be able to move past this problem. As for shocks I am waiting to see wait happens I didn't really expect to be in this position as you say but as always things will pass and the normal road will be able to be resumed but for now it looks like I am going to have to walk on that tightrope

Thanks a lot and kind regards
Tom

Hello Sunrise65,

The pertinent lines in Hex 51 suggest an accumulation, followed by release/a breakthrough without loss ... that's my experience.

51.4 - The shake releases the bog.
Comments:
The shake releases the bog
Not-yet shining indeed

51.5 - The shake going and coming adversity
Hundred thousand without loss, possessing affairs.
Comments:
The shake going and coming, adversity
Exposing movement indeed
One's affairs located in the center
The great without loss indeed

The Original I Ching Oracle
The Pure & Complete Texts with Concordance
R. Ritsema & S.A. Sabbadini

If my memory serves me well, you received 51.4 prior to a trip, and all went well (generally) according to your feedback.

T

Hi Themis

Thank you for your comments, yes I did get 51.4 for my trip and the was no bogging down, well none that I was aware of! this I thing is a different case though.. Anyway we'll see. I shall report back.

Regards
Tom

Well today the Yi enlightened in a very direct way! Found out S. is seeing someone so right on 51. Also definitey walking in the mud as the friendship seems to have split apart. Suprised I didn't get 23. Guess I can take the muddy boots off now.. certainly not what I expected but I am glad to have had an insight from the IC that I understood.

Shame as it was a good friendship

Thanks for the insight guys

t.

That is rough ... sorry to hear it. Sounds like a shock, to say the least. May the force be with you ... kick that mud off, and shine!!

Hi ace

yep, some you win some you lose! I asked a second question "how should I cope" and got 23.1 -> 35. IC is definitely talking to me today! Although having been done wrong to and retribution maybe a bit harsh, but flowing into prospering seems good... Anyway time will tell and hopefully heal.

regards
Tom

Pity. However, it's her loss - that's the emphasis.

Yes, that is sorta how I see it.. Funny how life pans out. I am just pleased that for once the IC made sense to me. Onwards and upwards as they say, and its summertime now so all is well..

and so..

I thought this chapter had been brought to a close when suddenly it pops back up again. After an attempt by S. to make bridges and with hindsight a rather childish response from me allowing a Taurean sulk to further distance and damage the friendship, I am now sitting at my parents house pretty much 6 months on from my first post look at the rollercoaster that it has been.

In order to try and make some sense of all this, but having made the decision to move on from this situation and cast out the question "What is the real relationship between me and S?" to which I received 2.3.6->52.

Trying to get a handle on this has lead me to two possible meanings.

a) Stop trying to do/lead/provoke the situation and accept that we are friends and that I should allow things to just happen, highlighted by 2 and 52 need for calmness and stillness. I like LiSe's take on these hexagrams

or

b) To turn my back on this, removing the ego and contemplating and becoming receptive to future events and friendships.

It seems as though the first option would be the harder as some bridge building would have to be done on my part. I have to say though that this process has opened up my eyes to many things about my character and behaviour I was never really aware of before I started this journey 6 months ago. I would like to add I am not looking for romantic involvement but simply a desire to see if this friendship is worth holding onto.

As ever thoughts and opinions greatly appreciated.

Regards
Tom

Hello,

The 'picture' in the lines depicts the past and present, or present and future. As there's already
some history, I'd read them as past and present. Line 2,3 is quite nice, however Line 2,6
suggests discord ... dragons struggling ... dao exhausted.

Whatever the case, nothing has been lost. On the contrary, you've gained insight and Ms. S has
tried to make amends which proves your friendship was valued.

At this point you'll decide whether you wish to reconciliate/repair. I'd guess it's possible.
The potential Hex (which I rarely take into consideration) indicates the outcome, at times the
background, so you'd both be 'bound' so to speak if no effort were made.

Thank you themis

A useful insight and probably very true about it being exhausted. Well I am back at work on Wednesday so I will 'learn' more. Thanks for the input.

Regards
Tom

What relationship?

Hi Willowfox

There is no relationship, I meant in general terms whether we could be friends or not as we work in a small/close environment.

Regards
Tom

Heed the advice of Hex 52, Keep Still.

Like I said before "What relationship?"

As I said, I meant a working, friendship relationship not a romantic one as she has found somebody. I shall keep still.

sunrise65 said:

As I said, I meant a working, friendship relationship not a romantic one as she has found somebody. I shall keep still.

Click to expand...

I know exactly what you meant, and what I meant was to keep the woman at a distance.

"What is the real relationship between me and S?" 2.3.6->52

I think this is the same woman of the 51,3.4>3. The one where you saw the shock being that she was involved with another, and this explained the reading. And, she is trying to make bridges to you and you are sulking at your parents (your explanations, no judgement intended). This does not feel like friendship, nor a collegial work relationship. Perhaps, I have missed the point.

2 it is a highly receptive field. It is a wide open field. Responsive to what is put into it. It serves. It will grow the seeds that are sown. It is the most powerful of its kind. Like your relationship, although not much **seems** to happen, when someone does something it bursts alive, positively or negatively. But, the positive and negative are about the seeds sown (the things done), not the field.

2.3 LISE (2.3) "one's inner pattern decides what one accomplishes". Perhaps, this is discussing the seeds of above. Perhaps you have a belief of how this relationship is **supposed to** be; your descriptions above does not feel like a friendship, but a courtship or something more than friendship. LISE (2.3) continues, "Act as if it is for a king, not for a goal". Hatcher (2.3) writes "a work will not be a great work if the whole of the point is its author's biography", and "some greater good may be served here". Perhaps, this is referring to the quality and the type of seeds being planted in the field.

2.6 Hatcher (2.6) 'both sides bleed" and "when you take sides, you can't have it all". You bleed, she bleeds. Your vision of the courtship bleeds, your wounded friendship bleeds. LISE (2.6) "not accepting fate means one brings about a life full of difficulties. One does not only fight what happens, but more than anything else one fights one's own soul". I think you have to accept or be receptive to what is actual in the relationship.

52 mountain. Stillness, meditative, still spines. LISE (52) writes "everything that goes beyond the situation of the now and here is impairing". Hatcher (52) writes "the noble young one, accordingly, contemplates nothing outside of its place" and "the real is contained in the obvious and the apparent".

I wonder if you are sewing the seeds of the envisioned relationship, in the actual field or relationship between the two of you. I think both of these relationships, the envisioned relationship and the actual relationship, are real to you. This is why things feel out of sync.

Only one of these fields can yield an actual crop. Perhaps, serve/be open to/receive the actual field, respond to/serve its here/now needs (serve the king/not your goals), and attend to the type and quality of the seed you sew. Be still in your intention, and you might be surprised at what can grow.