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18: 2,5 & 6 - 33. A dive into the heart..

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hebe

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I ask your understanding at the frequency of my visits here at this time - I don't enjoy asking for ongoing help but things are nearing a head. I've written before about the difficult scenario my husband & I are in with his wanting to cycle back to his native NZ and not knowing what will happen to us - its a call he can't ignore & yet for me this is what could be the end of our 10 year marriage. The thing is is that we are committed to stay where we are in our joint job until the end of the summer possibly more and he can't decide what to do for both our sakes. He hasn't handed in our notice yet and neither of us know what to do.

The thing is I can't read about grief without feeling the agony of pain inside - yet he's not going yet. I love him so completely and yet I can't grieve his going. It does feel like carnage inside - but unexpressed except in writing. When I talk to him about it he doesn't know what to do for the best. He is in as much indecision about when & how to go as I am in pain at his leaving without committing to coming back. I've written realms about it to try and express it and finally today in desperation asked the I Ching ' what would your guidance be in this situation?' focusing on the pain and the love and the not knowing. Do I accept the not knowing and enjoy the summer letting the pain dissolve, do I... what? It hurts so much and yet we still have time together - possibly until Feb now - with great fun & love as well. I am in such confusion - but I don't want this to turn inwards and cause me some ill health as I have had meningitis 3 times due to stress. I appreciate your insight into this situation. The answer was 18:2, 5 and 6 - 33. Unfortunately it smacked to me of the inner pain showing a lack of care and nourishment for myself - and according to Brian Brown tolerating what is a wrong. And an underlying fear preventing me from seeing the truth. But some of the words in Stephen Karcher make me wary of how I approach this - I don't want to risk things ending if it needn't be the case. BIG TIME. In appreciation, Hebe
 

willowfox

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in desperation asked the I Ching ' what would your guidance be in this situation?' answer was 18:2, 5 and 6 - 33.


Line 18.2 calls for tact in how you talk to him, because if you come on too strong then it will hit him hard making him move in the opposite direction of what you wanted.

Line 18.5 suggests that you try outside help to try and reason with him, to at least get him thinking that what is is planning to do is not "friendly".

Line 18.6 suggests that you curtail your feelings of love, sadness etc, as all this turmoil is directly hurting you, therefore you need to be much less emotional about all this.

Hex 33 is about becoming less involved emotionally, rise above it so it doesn't affect so directly, be more distant.
 
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hebe

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how instantly that changes how I feel

Gosh - can you believe how quickly we can change - just be reading your interpretation it feels totally uplifiting and changes the energy of my emotions just like that. From such despairing weakness to a strength and light heartedness. It gives me new energy and yes, a real willingness to be more detached. I am hugely grateful - you see, this is what I mean by not understanding the I Ching well enough - I could have read that on my own & done into such a low emotional place. But a new twist changes it all. Thanks Willowfox - I'm not saying I won't be back, but hopefully I can make progress from this and not need to ask so many questions. Hebe
 
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