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Estranged friend, 42.1.6 to 8

sibyleyes

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So there is this person who was my best friend. Misunderstandings happened blah blah and we haven't been speaking for almost a year. Now I look back and think we were both gong through so much BS and took it out on one another. We've been through worse and supported each other.

Anyway, I asked the I Ching of I should write her and try to reconcile our friendship. It answered 42.1.6 to 8.

Both hexagrams look great along with the first changing line.Increase/Prospering and Union. But the 6th line is not so great. "Someone beating him". Yeah, so I'm a little confused.

I also vaguely remember reading somewhere here that if the first and last line changes it means that the initial hexagram is more potent or something and therefore one should just look at the relating and not the changing lines. Is that true?

Thanks!
 

arabella

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So there is this person who was my best friend. Misunderstandings happened blah blah and we haven't been speaking for almost a year. Now I look back and think we were both gong through so much BS and took it out on one another. We've been through worse and supported each other. Anyway, I asked the I Ching of I should write her and try to reconcile our friendship. It answered 42.1.6 to 8.

Both hexagrams look great along with the first changing line.Increase/Prospering and Union. But the 6th line is not so great. "Someone beating him". Yeah, so I'm a little confused.

I also vaguely remember reading somewhere here that if the first and last line changes it means that the initial hexagram is more potent or something and therefore one should just look at the relating and not the changing lines. Is that true?

Thanks!

I think it's an excellent reading, saying you can get things back on track. The first changing line indicating that if you want reconciliation there's no reason not to have it. And something on the order, if you want a thing to change, then change it, you have the power to get the result, you have the skills to make this happen. And the second changing line I would see as more of a caution that if you want happiness, a good relationship, you have to keep a "steady heart" -- meaning I would think that when petty things arise, don't let them rule the situation; rule with the standard you'll want for the long haul. And now you know just how long that can be, and how awful it feels without your friends. The outcome is reunion, being reunited. GO FOR IT! This is just a problem waiting to be solved. And talk it out with your friend so that it isn't lkely to happen again over some trivial annoyances.:)
 

Trojina

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So there is this person who was my best friend. Misunderstandings happened blah blah and we haven't been speaking for almost a year. Now I look back and think we were both gong through so much BS and took it out on one another. We've been through worse and supported each other.

Anyway, I asked the I Ching of I should write her and try to reconcile our friendship. It answered 42.1.6 to 8.

Both hexagrams look great along with the first changing line.Increase/Prospering and Union. But the 6th line is not so great. "Someone beating him". Yeah, so I'm a little confused.

I also vaguely remember reading somewhere here that if the first and last line changes it means that the initial hexagram is more potent or something and therefore one should just look at the relating and not the changing lines. Is that true?

Thanks!

To cast a shadow on Arabellas bright reading....sorry :D

I'd say perhaps think twice

Do you really want the person back in your life ? Ask yourself that. Hex 8 as the relating hexagram asks you to consider who you belong with, this question is about who you choose to 'belong' with ...so theres still a ? there


42.6 is often about inconstancy, whimsy, the kind of behaviour where someone picks you up and drops you at their convenience....but here someone won't accept that., they may throw it back at you. I don't know if that was you or her.....but are you sure you want to get back together for the right reasons ?


Breaking with friends is weird because in a love afair theres loads of discussion about whats wrong etc but between friends there generally isn't.

Two same sex friends don't generally say "hey we need to talk about us" because it would feel silly so I think when things aren't working often one or the other will cause things to come to a head to finish it off...rather than let a lame or draining friendship limp on and on when its over cos its just over. I think its quite hard sometimes to end friendships when they need to end because the friendship has simply had its day


Hmmm anyway I'm not sure how to interpret this so Arabella could well be absolutely right....but I feel especially given you have both lines 1 and 6 that the desire for reunion (hex 8) could be a passing whim on your part ? Lines 1 and 6 together can often indicate a swiftly moving situation, an episode so to speak.



If its important to you to reconcile I can't see what harm it would do to try, she can only refuse...but my point is it may be worth examining the period before the break up before you connect again. Was it really because you were both going through BS ? You said yourself you had both been through worse and supported each other so there must have been some good reason for this year long silence between you. I don't think break ups are always a bad thing, they can be a very healthy thing for us...so all I'm saying is perhaps you might want to think it through just a bit more ?
 
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sibyleyes

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thanks arabella and trojan!

troan: you might be right here, maybe it is best to let it go.. I mean I made that decision consciously last year because as you said sometimes friendships reach their end and that's what I saw then. Why cling to the past, yes? I will take some time to think this over and see if it is worth my time as you say. eh..
 

sibyleyes

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hey! so an update: i've slept on it for a bit as trojan suggested and think it's worth giving a friendship another try. it doesn't have to be BFFs or anything, just friendly. we do have many mutual friends and it would be weird bumping into each other.

anyway, i asked the i ching for advice as to what i should do and got 45.1 to 17. seems i should 'reach out'. what do you guys think??
 

Trojina

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hey! so an update: i've slept on it for a bit as trojan suggested and think it's worth giving a friendship another try. it doesn't have to be BFFs or anything, just friendly. we do have many mutual friends and it would be weird bumping into each other.

anyway, i asked the i ching for advice as to what i should do and got 45.1 to 17. seems i should 'reach out'. what do you guys think??

seems a pretty direct answer doesn't it ?
 

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