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child support payments 56.3.4>23

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goddessliss

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Good morning,
The hearing for the dispute about child support from my exhusband is due to take place on the 23rd of this month.

I asked Show me a picture of receiving a lump sum from child support

Hex 56.3.4>23

I was hoping to receive this money to register my kombi campervan thereby not only be able to go take a much needed break but also to give my other car to my son, who I am teaching to drive, when he gains his licence as well as easing up the financial strain we are in.

My exhusband has been travelling with his fiance(older by 3 years though) - and he has told the child support agency she is supporting him financially (which she essentially is more or less) but he doesn't feel it is right that she should have to pay the child support payments just because he doesn't have the money.

So there are vehicles and travelling involved in this reading so I am not quite sure what to make of it.

thks
Meilssa x
 

icastes

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One must understand that travelling is considered by the Yijing to be a hazardous activity that should not be done lightly. Hence, 56 is very bad for getting money except maybe a small amount, bad for the court date, bad for travel, and you won't like the results. 23 is more distress, with your ex-husband bad-mouthing you as well. It is the lowest ebb of luck. Be prepared, Goddess.
 
G

goddessliss

Guest
Since posting this thread my son spoke to his dad and talked to him about how he misses him actually being his dad and sharing his life with him like motorbike riding and watching the footy together etc.
It took about a week but his dad has now decided to come back and live closer to us so that he can be a proper dad.
As you can imagine our son is very happy about this so wondering about this reading again.
Liss x
 

chingching

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well thats good news, I see what you mean in this light 56 looks like his dad doesnt it, but in line 4 still the heart is not contented.

23 image:
Thus those above can ensure their position
Only by giving generously to those below

who do you think is above and who is below? If we relate this back to the court hearing then these roles can be placed as the one above being the court and the one below being either your ex husband or yourself. He could be below in terms of conduct, inability to earn a living,. you could be below in terms of not being in a position of power.

23 it feels like the situation that is current will be stripped away, something else for the child support will arise instead. However turns out something about it will be more straight forward.

the image from 56 (quoted from wiki wing)
The noble one is enlightened and thoughtful in administering punishments, and doesn't draw out legal proceedings.

It sounds like you will receive a fair judgement with immediate results.

back to 56.3, echoes your son's presence in all of this, it seems you need to look out for him both financially... but doing this without hurting his relationship to his dad... and thus emtionally.

56.4 like i said above, but also gives me a sense that a lump sum actually wont even be helpful to you in the long run.

the trigrams are fire above mountain which reflects the judgement that the constancy of the mountain is needed, coupled with the adaptability and clarity of fire (no hidden actions). The constancy here needs to be for child support and your boys contact with their dad... the adaptability will be needed for how and how much child support he can or is ordered to pay etc.

I mean actually in terms of remaining adpatable, a lump sum might actually suit him better than having to pay weekly or whatever. I'm not aware of the details of child support so I'm just generalising.

But then in the trigrams of 23 we have mountain above earth, so that which was constant in 56 is now crumbling away to earth, the receptive... creating space for something new.

some things to think about.

the picture shown though is of a difficult situation where needs are not being met. But I think you can take heart in the image of 56, that the person making the descision will be enlightened.
 
G

goddessliss

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Thks chingching that makes a lot of sense to me.
With the child support issue I was asked to be part of a conference call about the whole thing and momentarily I got caught up in 'well I'll just show him how much it costs to raise a child and the huge responsbility it is doing it on your own blah, blah...' and then I just thought to myself, 'what am I doing - it's not about the money, its about the child and his emotional well being' and have left it to the Universe. Yes it is about being financially viable enough to support him(and me) but we make do, eat well, enjoy each other without having to spend a lot of money, I have a job so I will just work more to bring in more and save for a holiday even if its for only a couple of days.
I'm not being a matry, I am justing removing the angst I don't need which then energetically moves it from our son.
His dad has never had 'peace in his heart' since I've known him and he has a done a lot of things to let us down over the years but I think he really has only let himself down and so it goes around and around in his head so he turns to alcohol and other things to try and keep the thoughts at bay and we all know where that leads.
Personally I think its more important what you do from now than what you have done in the past.
So I guess line 4 means even when he does land back here, sets himself up etc. he's still not gonna feel good.
Since I found out he was returning I have had that feeling of Hex 23 - that it is just stripping away all the sh.. that has been going on for the past 2 years and it will come to some sort of final conclusion. Yay! Thks chingching xx
 
U

unsubscribed_cm

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One must understand that travelling is considered by the Yijing to be a hazardous activity that should not be done lightly. Hence, 56 is very bad for getting money except maybe a small amount, bad for the court date, bad for travel, and you won't like the results. 23 is more distress, with your ex-husband bad-mouthing you as well. It is the lowest ebb of luck. Be prepared, Goddess.

Interesting, is her ex husband badmouthing this "goddess"? I did not see that in the origional post. Perhaps the guy just does not have the money? Hexagram 56 is about being alone in strange places. 23 is about a bad situation. Probably because you are depending on his money although you have divorced, and because he has no income.

23 could mean you are in the position of power - which it seems to me as you are getting his money and you have the kid. 23 also suggests you actually use the money for the child and not your campervan. I know the courts dont care one way or anther as long as the father pays up and they see his money go un your pocket...But your sandards should be higher. I think 23 suggests this...

Sorry if my tone came though but i have stong views on this kind of topic. Family courts are ruthless to fathers and very matriarchal. Many women have kids to get a man slave post divorce and only use it for their selfish ends. If he doest pay he gets to be called nanes like "deadbeat dad" and then tossed in jail to never see his kids... 23 could also be a reflection of this situation, that is about to get worse (at least for someone).
 
G

goddessliss

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CyclotronMajesty sounds like it is a subject close to your heart.
The idea of getting the campervan registered is so my son can have my other car for himself and also we use the campervan for our holidays mainly taking my son to motorbike meets or up and down the coast for him to surf - so no I have never used the child support for my own needs specificially.
And in reality if I was relying on his child support payments well we would be in dire straits.
I work to support us and I am studying up to 4 hours a day so hopefully I can get a job in education working with deaf children or teaching hearing children sign language so they can communicate with the deaf.
As for him badmouthing me he has done that since he left although he is the one who abandoned me and the kids to take up with another women and yes he does have the money. Originally he had a well paid job which he stopped to travel and he received an inheritance of over $200,000.00. Now I could have taken legal action to get part of that and more but you energetically I don't need that angst. I have never tried to interfere with the kids seeing him and they chose to live with me but they always had a choice after all they are teenagers and old enough to make their own decision in that regard.
That's just the truth - not bad mouthing him because I don't believe in doing that. He is the childrens dad and I am the mum and that's the only important thing to me.
Your tone is quite strong but no offense taken, as it sounds like the issue upsets you so I am sorry if this sort of situation has effected you in your own life but thanks for taking an interest.
Yesterday my son was diagnosed with glandular fever so if any of you have ever had that you can imagine how sick he is. xx
 

chingching

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yup I had it. Dont take anti-biotics! ( I did and got a full body rash) The only thing that finally got me over glandular fever (and I still felt effects after 5 years) was doing a flush with ginger water everyday, then eating a no suagr no white bread or pasta diet and Pilates. Its such a horrible thing!

CyclotronMajesty, your post seems too close to a personal attack. I'm not sure how it was helpful.

Child support, divorce etc. not fun for anyone... and this isnt a forum about that, its a forum about I Ching readings.
 
G

goddessliss

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Thks chingching - it is great to get advice from someone who has experienced this debilitating illness, I have shed a few tears in worry over my son.
Yes you are right the IChing is the best tool I have ever come across to advise and give clarity - oh that and the sistahood. xx
 
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unsubscribed_cm

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Well i wish you and you your husband (though divorced) and your son the best.
 
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sooo

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I asked Show me a picture of receiving a lump sum from child support

Hex 56.3.4>23

Fire doesn't linger but moves on quickly. 23 represents loss of some kind. The Wanderer (let's say that's your ex and gf) burns down their camp (doesn't stay in one spot or leave much of a trail), and fails the young assistant (let's say that's your son). He (the wanderer) finds what he needs, but still isn't happy. If his gf wants to pay his child support, he's damned lucky, but he's not exactly happy about it. At least one would hope not.

Since 56 is about not judging or bringing to trial, I don't think the reading is from a judgment perspective, but if it is literally a picture of how it would be if you won and received the agreed upon settlement (paid by whomever), than you may get or keep the van to enable your son's activities... but someone, maybe him, still isn't glad. It's a tough situation, and kids can take on the blame of their parents, unfortunately. Hope his dad doesn't withhold his love from him, regardless whether he's working currently or not. A man with failed pride can made his heart hard. That would a 23 for everyone.

The flip side of 23 is that you get past the appearances, and can access the inner workings. There's loss of what's no longer needed, for the benefit of the root and the whole: pruning. That could be very healthy.
 
G

goddessliss

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Thankyou sooo, And you pretty well have it correct.
When we were married we moved around a lot because he was never satisfied(heart is not glad) in his job and just about everyday he would come home with a story about something negative that had happened by someone towards him, so we would pack up our belongings and the kids and go 'chasing' the next great job. Finally I said enough and we settled in one place - where I live now - but in 8 years he changed jobs 4 times - very unsettling for everyone.
When he left to travel with his gf I thought same thing he is 'chasing' something that doesn't exist it is so very sad and one thing after the other has gone wrong for them, well actually since their relationship started it has been like that, and they just keep 'burning their camp' and moving along.
He has told my son he will come back here and settle so he can spend more time with him but he said it may take a month or two to get back here - he is about 2 days drive away.
Fortunately my son does not take the blame as far as I can see - he see the truth about his dad but loves him just the same which is extremely important to me for his emotional well being though I can see he is hurt by the choices his dad has made.

'A man with failed pride can made his heart hard. That would a 23 for everyone.

This is true - he is actually a beautiful person but cannot see that himself so makes decision based on his lack of self esteem.

The flip side of 23 is that you get past the appearances, and can access the inner workings. There's loss of what's no longer needed, for the benefit of the root and the whole: pruning. That could be very healthy.
'

This is also true. Personally it would be great if the child support payments came through from a practical point of view but its not in my heart etc. to 'win'. I like earning my own money and paying for things myself.
The loss of what's no longer needed - I believe and hope that, that is what this is all about.

Thankyou to all who have contributed to this post - I should find out by the end of this week what the outcome of this hearing is. Liss x
 
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goddessliss

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This is the outcome of the hearing -

That as the father he must be responsible in someway for his son and as he has enough money to support his lifestyle choice(to travel), he has enough money to support his son and that they disbelieve that he has nil income.

Therefore as the father he must pay the child support.

Apparently this hearing took place on the 17th of March and not the 23rd as was the original date although I don't know why.

At this point in time I actually haven't received an payment/s but he is now legally bound to pay at some point.

Melissa x
 
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goddessliss

Guest
Last week the school fee issue came up again and exhusband said I can pay the fees out of the child support, the child support is a whopping $100 per month at this point.
He doesn't seem to realise that it is child support for everyday living etc. It is not for school fees especially when that is a privilige, as there are plenty of non-fee schools around or he can do it by correspondence. He offered my son the privilege when we were married because he could afford to pay the fees, I wasn't against it, but I didn't have the means to pay the fees and I still don't now so just because we are no longer married doesn't mean that changes.
So exhusband has sent me an abusive txt because he has no been ordered to pay the child support. Son is jumping up and down telling me to stop studying and get another job so he can keep going to this school - this boy is in his 17th year.
I said if you are that keen you get a job and pay the fees but he says no as a parent I should do this and do that - yikes!
Anyway to me its all good Hex 23 stripping away - finally resolution I believe.
I don't see it as my responsilbity or my problem which I finally got through to my son so he is now going to ask his millionare grandfather to pay the fees.
Bl--- hell!

have a fun day
Liss xx
 

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