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19 changes 1,5 > 29

rainbowgirl

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Hola!

I've recently walked away from a relationship which was not healthy and feel like I want to protect myself a bit at the moment... but would eventually like to meet a good man, fall in love and live happily ever after. Yada, yada, yada... don't most of us. I've got great things going on in my life at the moment and feel really happy. I don't have problems meeting guys, however, am conscious that I would like to avoid getting involved with another man who isn't right for me or hasn't got my best interests at heart.

I asked the IChing "Please could you give me advise on relationships... (of an intimate nature)" and received hex 19 with changes 1, 5 changing to hex 29.

I'm stumped :confused: on what the IChing is advising and if anyone has any suggestions on the interpretation I would be most grateful.

:bows:
 

heylise

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There is a danger to 'seeking' a relation (29) - there always is. It is every time again uncharted territory, slippery terrain, like a water-course with its rocks and rapids. If you try to get one in any way possible, you will certainly lose your footing or worse. But if you go about it in a 19-way, you do it the best way possible.

Hex.19 is about 'overview', not seeing in the other what you want, but really seeing who he is. No fairy prince but a real living person with his good and difficult sides. In 19.1 you take responsibility for your own actions, you yourself are nearing with love, giving love, not expecting it to come to you. In 19.5 you know about limits, you are careful, realistic. Romantic feelings are great, but you don't drown in them, you give everything its right place.
 

angeleyes

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Hello!

I've been thinking about hex 29 lately and your thread gives me the opportunity to share some of my thoughts... I have a feeling that sometimes 29 is about the danger of drowning in the wild river of your own fears and insecurities. Emotions are closely related to the element of water and in this hex water is uncontrolable and has become a dangerous, unfriendly surrounding. It is only natural that the heart is feeling 29 after a breakup ( much more so after an unhealthy relationship). There are feelings of pain and anguish and the urgent need to make it right and compensate through someone new. And ofcourse, as Lise pointed out, if you act on those feelings you could find yourself in another compicated and painfull situation..

However, you don't have to fear anymore, because 19 gives you the way through. The lines are the advice you need. You now have the knowledge and wisdom to approach love and the other person in an open-hearted, yet thoughtfull way without repeating past mistakes. You know enough to give love and at the same time protect yourself from painfull behaviours and patterns!

I think you got a lovely reading and with 19 in mind everything will be just fine.
Good luck with that!
Love
A.:bows:
 

rainbowgirl

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Thank you so much Lise and Angeleyes!

Well this is all really good news. And it cements my theory that I am, and have already been doing a lot of the right things. I think the main place where I could take note is the being friends for longer before stepping into something new. I always say at the beginning that I'd like to be friends first... and yes we are friends... but get swept up in the romanticism of the time. I need to be stronger, for a little while longer! :) That way I get to see their true self before I let my heart get sucked into another unhealthy relationship.

Thanks and love

:bows:
 

rainbowgirl

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Hello Olga
Thank you for contacting me. Well yes it has been a journey since 2009!
OK so - I can't directly recall who (or if!?) I was seeing in 2009 but if I was, it didn't work out and they probably ended up being a bit of a plonker. So made the same choices.
The I-ching reading was spot on though. It wasn't until 2013 that I worked it all out (although to be fair, I had completely forgotten this reading at the time). I had finished working my day job and was practicing yoga daily. One week, I decided to focus all my efforts on thinking about this one particular issue: 'not being in a relationship' and wanting to 'meet the right person' for me, and I, or my consciousness, gave me the most insightful gift :bows: I basically worked out (and my goodness this sounds so ruddy simple now!), that I was giving way too much attention and energy to being a bit 'poor me' about not being in a real, healthy, relationship - and comparing myself to lots of other friends and acquaintances - Yes, not very healthy eh!? And then I had this epiphany: that I was in fact the problem. Yes me! As Lise advised above - "There is a danger to 'seeking' a relation (29) - there always is."
And that was really it, plain and simple. I then realised that all my thoughts were hard wired into my brain (neural pathways) And that if I re-directed a negative thought to something else - say, building up my business instead - then I could change that habitual thinking. So each time I saw my negative thought loop I visualised a big heavy golden baseball bat and hit the thought which then shattered into a million bits of golden illuminated glitter - and then replaced that thought with something which would actually help my business. It only took about a week to do this before I stopped having to this manually, so to speak. And then completely forgot about wanting to meet the man of my dreams. It simply was of no importance any more. Fast forward six months later.... I meet that man of my dreams. Well, so I thought! We are still together 5 years on, but oh my christ - I still attracted someone who had addictions! He hid it so well that I didn't find out until after a year of being together (luckily not as bad as alcohol, like the chap I was referring to in the first message above). The good news is my current boyfriend gave it up 2 years ago... but obviously there are other layers to work through (Biting Through). But hey - that's all by the by. The point is for this particular question I was asking about how to get into a relationship. I managed to go with advise of 29 but wasn't able to fully read him in terms of advice of hex 19. We are in it now for the long haul. I am eternally grateful to yoga for helping me see through my limitations.
I hope this reflection helps you with your own inquiries.
Namaste :bows:
 
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