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How to best support my friend? 32 Unchanging.

dalila

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Hi all,
My friend and I started seeing each other a few months ago, and we've been getting to know each other slowly, and it's been very positive and very nice, with clear mutual feelings. We are both busy professionals and single parents. From the beginning we were seeing each other once or twice a week, but recently he has been inundated with a big project at work, and we haven't seen each other for almost 3 weeks. We have kept in touch warmly, mostly by email. He is very stressed. I've become somewhat stressed because our relationship is so new, and to be honest I admit all this time apart is making me nervous. I have been mostly very supportive but occasionally needy, asking when we will see each other.

I asked the Yi, How can I best support X? And received Hexagram 32, unchanging. My first thought with this was to persevere with the relationship, letting him know I'll still be there when the work is over. But I think 32 also means keep on going how I have been, and I've been mixed, both frustrated (and frustrating) and supportive. The past couple of days I have just completely kept my distance.

What do you think? What is 32 telling me about how can I best support him?
Thanks!
 

icastes

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32 is about duration and unchangeable constancy. Hence, the best thing to be is honest, sincere, and guarding your present position. Let the man work, and you will be support him best.
 
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Hi Dalila,

32 is one of the Hexagrams that deals directly with courtship. It is saying to be unchangable like icastes said. The hexagram is that of how a marriage works and lasts (Hence 'Duration'). For the courtship to last, the man must be the driving force, and the woman the submissive. The man must work and the woman stays in. Perhaps it is saying, also like icastes said, to just let him work. If he is really busy that must be what he needs to do to get things accomplished at this time. Be there for him. Be unchanging. Don't be swayed by occasional neediness. It seems from your description of things, that you are doing what you need to be doing. Just stick with it. I think the Yi would have given you another Hexagram if you needed to take another approach. This one is simply saying, you are doing the right thing, stick with it! ;)
 

dalila

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Thank You!

Thank you both so much for your replies. I guess I wasn't sure if I was being told to hang in there and be supportive, or to keep my distance, as I had been doing for the past couple of days. We were in touch yesterday and he is absolutely drowning in work. I will remain supportive!

Thanks and I wish you both well today! :)
Dalila
 

dalila

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23 to 30

My friend is deeper in his work, and very stressed by it. We had a date last week to see a movie, and it was very nice to be together. But when he gets stressed to this degree he grows silent. He doesn't answer my emails or phone calls. We haven't spoken since our date a week ago. I asked: What is this silence about? And threw 23.1.3.4 changing to 30. This is hard to interpret. Of course seeing 23 makes me immediately fear the silence is about him splitting apart from me. But changing to 30? The clinging? Radiance? I wonder if you all have some thoughts on this?

I heard what you said before - let the man work! And I really have been. And mostly I've been ok and he called me supportive. But a week long silence is pretty hard. This is not the first time he's been silent, but it's the longest. Last time it was just about work.
 

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