I wish for you all more clarity in 2013! Happy New Year!

This is not a relationship question but a thread of those lead me to the questions below I want to share with you. I was together with someone this Summer and it was going great, I thought, but suddenly he dropped out because "he doesnt want to be in a relationship". It was painful, I tried many approaches to stay in his life, to get him back, but we run in circles and every other 3 weeks I am dealing with deep rejection again. So I decided to stop and retreat, also because the amount of resentment towards him now is higher than the love I had (have...). My questions in the last 2 months were mostly "what should I do" and "what is the right attitude" and it was clear it was to invest (42), approach 19, 31 and 45 and 8, 32. The lines were pretty straightforward too. But as I kept finding rejection and indifference on his side, and I am now numb with pain, I asked in the format I had promised myself to quit, the less recommendable "are we to be together again" and "what does he want from me".
To the first question I got static answers, 46 last week and 38 this week. 46 I thought was hopeful, this week I think it is a clear no. But I never know what static answers mean... (hence we arrive at my reason to write)
It was the answer to "his intentions towards me" that broke the thin thread of hope I still had. I dont think it gets any clearer than that, with 59 (3,6) 48, this guy has a very strong decision to keep me away, for whatever reason, he dispersed his own passion.

My actual question is about a whole approach to the readings. I realize I am myself not clear whether I believe certain things are already pre-decided or everything is in the open. According to you experience with the I Ching, can you always change the course of things?
The book clearly tells me to invest (or does it tell me my wish is to invest? does it only mirror the 8, 45, 31, 32 I am looking for and not what should I do? is there even a right and wrong course of action?...) but also is very clear about him not reciprocating my feelings and apparently the low or no possibility for a return (38).
Im confused.

Often when I ask about the future or some answer where I am out of my way somehow the answer is static. Is this a way for the book not to answer? Or is it the answer not yet available?

Im sure this has been discussed here at many points but I cant find it, can you point me to these threads? And about this situation, do you have a word of advice? The Y seems to tell me he has blocked me out of his life somehow but somehow inspires me to invest in the contact. (Last one was 19,6 - is the spiritual dance my personal growth through surrendering to what is? but why should I be chasing someone who treats me with indifference and neglect...?)

ok, to sum it all up, at the heart of all the wondering I would like to know:
IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE I CAN DO THAT CAN BRING US BACK TOGETHER AS A LOVE COUPLE? 26 (3,6) 19
I still read advice to persevere, and follow and...

I would really appreciate some less-tainted view on all this...
Thank you!
Yoana :bows:

I'm trying to continue amassing experiences of unchanging castings over in Exploring Divination....we are only up to hex 9.

Easiest way to find that series of threads is to search all threads posted by Arabella in Exploring Divination. There was a long thread there all about unchanging castings.


I don't agree with your take on the unchanging casts you got. I mean hex 46 uc is so often about outgrowing something, moving on....and hex 42 uc I have found doesn't mean 'invest' in something falling apart. I had it in a similar sort of situation to you once and i think its more about generosity in allowing it to be what it is but not by investing more just by using the experience as compost so to speak....to invest back into yourself

That is he's a man who is messing you about.....thats what he's doing for whatever reason. You don't need the Yi to tell you that you know that. You know its not working....so plough the whole experience back into yourself. With that attitude it becomes easier to be generous with him.....he gave you so much food for thought and soul growth etc etc and he just is as he is and did as he did cos thats where he is right now....that for me has seemed to come up with 42 uc in several areas. I mean there's more of course. I'm still thinkingon it but I have noticed a pattern with 42 uc

I'm skimming because you've written a very thoughtful post and I'm too tired to do it justice...but from what you say it seems this guy is just not treating you well so whatever answer you got i can't see that it can over ride that reality.


Shared readings seems so often to show women doubting their crystal clear perceptions the man is not right for her...or doubting his crystal clear communications that hes not interested. Thats just a general observation, which includes what i've seen in myself so it's not meant personally.....but to me it's clear this is not worth persisting in and I say that by the outstanding weight of the evidence as you have presented it.

So I am so clear you should move on now I'm not the best person to do a unbiased reading....but the 26.6 can be a pretty strong karmic shove out onto heavens highway and frankly I really can't see heavens highway for you as being as dreary as hanging about for a person who demonstrates such indifference to you.....C'mon heavens highway has to be a shining beautiful path that fulfills your dreams not this sad limp thing thats trying to do an impression of love.


Mmmm perhaps I am going a bit OTT here but thats cos its late...and I read your post saw no one answered yet and reading through thought "no no no Yoanna this isn't enough for you is it ! ?"


You may get a less biased answer at some point from someone else


Meantime keep on thinking about unchanging castings....I'll give a link if i can find it to the first of the threads

here's one link on unchanging castings


http://www.onlineclarity.co.uk/friends/showthread.php?t=14313

oh and these circles you describe...circles of wanting , circles of rejection.....they are very common, SR is full of them and they never are worth the huge amount of suffering they engender.....ETA well they are very good compost for art, music and poetry and soul growth so perhaps they are worth something


.....plus these circles are the thing that gets most females into the I Chingin the first place

ok, to sum it all up, at the heart of all the wondering I would like to know:
IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE I CAN DO THAT CAN BRING US BACK TOGETHER AS A LOVE COUPLE? 26 (3,6) 19
I still read advice to persevere, and follow and...

Click to expand...

I feel i have to return to the scene of the crime....the crime being my view of the situation totally eclipsed this reading which is of course a sublime answer, a favourable answer.....

but if you have already done many casts and mistakenly read them as advice to persevere and follow I wonder if you reached the stage where no answer means anything very much anymore and you have to look to the actuality and give Yi a break.

My view remains as it was.....but the reading here doesn't support my view, to be fair.

Dear Trojan - thank you!
For being transparent in your reaction and for providing the links. I will only be able to follow them later tonight.
I have to step out to work, there are only some ideas I would like to share b4 I leave:

The aim of this thread was more to discuss how to handle unchanging hexagrams and hear people's overall attitudes towards the idea that some things are bound to happen, or if they see the Y as an instrument of free-will.
I realize I cant be asking about the future if i don't have that clear for myself- and I dont.

From my experience it seems that I get an unchanging Hex every time the book does not want to answer or the answer is not available yet.
If it is not available yet, perhaps its really in the open and it depends on the agency of people involved.

I gave the example of this relationship because yes, I am confused in face of what comes up in the readings, and I keep getting unchanging hexagrams that - for me - are contradictory (46 and 38, for example, though 46 has also been a question that after a while i outgrow..."soon this answer wont even be important anymore" kind of thing) So perhaps time will tell.

What I see now is that the book seems to tell me: he does not want to be with you together again AND keep investing in it.
That can make sense if you think I have a strong-bellic ego which hates to loose. And being rejected often triggers this warlike tendency in me of "im gonna get him back no matter what" that has NOTHING to do with love. Perhaps its time my ego learns to surrender by accepting i wont "WIN" him back but that he can have another role in my life. That, for me, would be Hex 2. But I dont have 2, I have 42, 46, 19 and 32... which I see differently.

Im cool with that, the bitterness of staying friends. its gonna be ego-painful but I can see its needed. I am still trying to WIN people and CONQUER and BE ON TOP, my intimate relationship have too strong power dynamics, and love wont strive there, for sure. Maybe the time has come to learn how to give up power in a healthy way.... I dont know...

I got 19,6 twice when I asked "How to better approach our relationsip from now on?"
That line for me has something to do with taking the process for inner growth, a spiritual dance (of surrender to what is)

The problem is that WHAT IS is that I am always the one putting the effort to be in touch and allowing for continuity and he is totally passive, aloof, careless - not even talking love, just really concerning friendship. And then I feel I dont need that. To chase someone around... Then - Im confused!

So, yeah, there are two levels here: one is the overall WHAT TO DO ABOUT THE PRESENCE OF THIS PERSON IN MY LIFE, what to invest, how to protect myself from further rejection, etc. Right now Im calmer and Im ready to let time show us what it wants from us. He has my number, i am now officially passive!
On the other level, I will keep using the Y and keep getting unchanging Hexagrams and would like to broaden my view on those. So, independently of we ever getting back together again or 26,6 meaning that I finally LEARN TRUE LOVE! beyond ego and power (wouldnt THAT be heavens highway!!!!?) my focus is more on: what is the connection between free-will, determinism, and unchanging Hexs? In your opinion.

Man, Im late now!
=D
Hope to hear more from you and other voices later!!!!!
thanks!
yoana*

What I see now is that the book seems to tell me: he does not want to be with you together again AND keep investing in it.
That can make sense if you think I have a strong-bellic ego which hates to loose. And being rejected often triggers this warlike tendency in me of "im gonna get him back no matter what" that has NOTHING to do with love. Perhaps its time my ego learns to surrender by accepting i wont "WIN" him back but that he can have another role in my life. That, for me, would be Hex 2. But I dont have 2, I have 42, 46, 19 and 32... which I see differently.

Im cool with that, the bitterness of staying friends. its gonna be ego-painful but I can see its needed. I am still trying to WIN people and CONQUER and BE ON TOP, my intimate relationship have too strong power dynamics, and love wont strive there, for sure. Maybe the time has come to learn how to give up power in a healthy way.... I dont know...

Click to expand...

This is quite alien to me....because surely if someone shows disinterest your ego would enable you to let them go.....to keep your pride at least. So I can't really see that trying to get him back is down to ego ....but maybe it is for you.

I'm very different. If I think there's no interest from the other then I'm gone. (maybe thats my venus in Leo kicking in) If that's ego then it's ego working for me.....To me it's never a good idea to pursue a man who is disinterested....surely ? I mean it seems very undignified for a woman to keep pursuing a man who shows no interest. So how can it be egotistical to do it ?

I confess i don't really follow that this is all a power trip to you...seems more like humbling to you to persist where not wanted.

Oh well just more of my opinion I guess

perhaps someone will address the readings at some point


OH BTW the question of fatedness in unchanging casts etc was discussed to some degree in above link earlier in thread

Somehow 26.3.6 < 19 in this context (along with the "circle" imagery) reminds me of how the guy eventually won the girl in the movie, Ground Hog's Day. He finally forgot about pursuing her and got on with developing himself in many ways --- helping people, learning to play the piano, etc. I am not suggesting that if you do that that you will him back. But I do think 26.3.6 < 19 suggests developing a talent or too. Accumulate your Greatness! To me Hexagram 26 doesn't suggest being in the home with the white picket fence and the man with his slippers on.

As far as the question about whether or not the I Ching can give us advise that helps us change things... I suspect there is a lot of individual variation in this. I will share my individual experience so far in case it helps you ferret out what is happening for you. Sometimes it seems that when I ask for advise, the Yi gives me a description of the situation ---as if to say ---"this is what you need to see --- now what do you want to do?" And then when I ask for a description of something, Yi seems to give me advise about it. It's the darnedest thing. I can tell that the advise is wise. And often people on this forum clarify things and I can tell that what they say is wise. What I notice about myself is that even with the clarity of the wisdom, I often cannot follow the advise. Doing what the "ideal Realising Person" would do is often a challenge. I don't anticipate becoming a jun zi tomorrow.

To me it sounds like you are arriving at clarity. If you can manage to "surrender to what is" , as you say, wouldn't that be a HUGE CHANGE? And then you would know, "Yes. We can change the course of things. I can change my inability to surrender." Not so easy in my experience. The I Ching helps us with self control but it does not help us to control others. And for me, self control is difficult enough. (I'm having to develop a forgiving sense of humor and not take myself so seriously.)

Could Yi be telling you to INVEST in WHO YOU ARE rather than in the relationship? What does he have or reflect that you could invest in for yourself and the larger world?

Could Yi be telling you to INVEST in WHO YOU ARE rather than in the relationship? What does he have or reflect that you could invest in for yourself and the larger world?

Click to expand...

yes and the 45 unchanging Yoanna mentioned I find is really often about a strong gathering together of yourself....well there is that phrase "pull yourself together !" often used as admonition for those whose emotions are casuing them to flop about all over the place.

Plus however much we try we can't account for someone who may be being careless or cruel with our hearts when we have invested ourselves there. I had the impression Yoanna he is not always displaying disinterest but picks you up when it suits him and drops you when it suits him and that is not kind it's selfish. So rather than seeing this as about your need to be less of an egotist etc etc 45 would suggest you gather yourself in from such careless treatment, rally yourslef. You have done this by withdrawing I guess....but overall sounds like you aren't accounting for his carelessness with your affections but taking it all on as your fault in some way.


I could be wrong as I don't know the whole story.....just a thought...

trojan said:

Plus however much we try we can't account for someone who may be being careless or cruel with our hearts when we have invested ourselves there. I had the impression Yoanna he is not always displaying disinterest but picks you up when it suits him and drops you when it suits him and that is not kind it's selfish. So rather than seeing this as about your need to be less of an egotist etc etc 45 would suggest you gather yourself in from such careless treatment, rally yourslef. You have done this by withdrawing I guess....

Click to expand...

hm, I like that, poignantly said T!

yoana said:

From my experience it seems that I get an unchanging Hex every time the book does not want to answer or the answer is not available yet.

Click to expand...

Dear yoana,

I know how you feel as sometimes I feel frustrated as well for not having changing lines to go straight to the point. But what I would like to say to you is that in fact there is a lot to get from unchanging hexagrams, the Yi is actually giving an answer with the whole hexagram for you to look into the subject at hand. Just a while ago, over Christmas, I had 28 unchanging and trojan nicely came to my rescue by looking into it from several different angles. So, please consider your unchanging hexagrams as a proper answer and just embrace them

Take care :bows:

Probably due to my own confusion and difficulty to express myself well at this level of subtlety in english this thread took a strange turn away from my wonderings...

I appreciate all your views - thanks! - and now reading everything and the links I am still very unclear about unchanging Hexs but I will keep on studying how they play out in my readings. At this moment in my short path as a student I feel this: the book answers "I really cant answer that yet/right now, but go and think about this" being this the hexagram.

At a certain level I think our path together is not really determined yet, that is why so many unchanging answers. We would both have to learn some lessons, well if not him, Im sure I would.

My intuition tells me we wont get back together but that there is something else I am still not seeing - and that only time will tell.

Im not even sure what I want anymore.

trojan said:

This is quite alien to me....because surely if someone shows disinterest your ego would enable you to let them go.....to keep your pride at least. So I can't really see that trying to get him back is down to ego ....but maybe it is for you.

I'm very different. If I think there's no interest from the other then I'm gone. (maybe thats my venus in Leo kicking in) If that's ego then it's ego working for me.....To me it's never a good idea to pursue a man who is disinterested....surely ? I mean it seems very undignified for a woman to keep pursuing a man who shows no interest. So how can it be egotistical to do it ?

Click to expand...

trojan, im the same. It is not about pursuing a man who is not interested. It is accepting he is not interested and staying for whatever is there when the man-woman thing doesnt work.
I just think its pretty conditional to love someone but only if they love you back exactly in the way you need them too. Perhaps this guy came into my life so I can broaden this scope. Often, for me, unrequited love is just too painful and there is no chance for friendship. Maybe in this case there is some value (26.6!) in giving it a chance.
Nobody referred to this one but the book was VERY CLEAR with 59 (3,6) 48 regarding the space he has to fall back in love with me. He just wont.
Sometimes I feel the Y encourages me to just stay in his life and see what comes.
For that I would need to understand better the nature of 26,3 - any tips?

Listen to this!
Today I was in a part of town I never go to strolling around when I had a zillion other things to do and I bumped into him on a street corner. We had to laugh! He was just arriving from the airport straight home and took the wrong bus... I mean...
There was a warm hug and he said he would call later once he got his luggage home and some rest. He never did.

Trojan, he is not as bad as you paint him - he is just not interested. I can chose to have my heart broken again and again or accept that he made a decision not to share his heart with me and see what else is there to be lived.

I truly dont know if I want to stay friends. But Im very curious about whats in this for me, as 26.6 and 19.6 somehow point to an emotional/spiritual maturity I still very much lack.

Again, I cant get my thoughts around 26,3 andThis is quite alien to me....because surely if someone shows disinterest your ego would enable you to let them go.....to keep your pride at least. So I can't really see that trying to get him back is down to ego ....but maybe it is for you.

I'm very different. If I think there's no interest from the other then I'm gone. (maybe thats my venus in Leo kicking in) If that's ego then it's ego working for me.....To me it's never a good idea to pursue a man who is disinterested....surely ? I mean it seems very undignified for a woman to keep pursuing a man who shows no interest. So how can it be egotistical to do it ?
[/QUOTE]

trojan, im the same. It is not about pursuing a man who is not interested. It is accepting he is not interested and staying for whatever is there when the man-woman thing doesnt work.
I just think its pretty conditional to love someone but only if they love you back exactly in the way you need them too. Sometimes unrequited love is just too painful and there is no chance for friendship. Maybe in this case there is some value (26.6!) in giving it a chance. The book was VERY CLEAR with 59 (3,6) 48 regarding the space he has to fall back in love with me. He just wont.
Sometimes I feel the Y encourages me to just stay in his life and see what comes.

Today I was in a part of town I never go to strolling around when I had a zillion other things to do and I bumped to him on a street corner. We had to laugh, he was just arriving from the airport straight home and took the wrong bus. There was a warm hug and he said he would call later once he got his luggage home and some rest. He never did.

Trojan, he is not as bad as you paint him - he is just not interested. I can chose to have my heart broken again and again or accept that and see what stays.

I truly dont know if I want to stay friends. But Im very curious about whats in this for me, as 26.6 and 19.6 somehow point to an emotional/spiritual maturity I still very much lack.

callingcrane said:

To me it sounds like you are arriving at clarity. If you can manage to "surrender to what is" , as you say, wouldn't that be a HUGE CHANGE? And then you would know, "Yes. We can change the course of things. I can change my inability to surrender." Not so easy in my experience. The I Ching helps us with self control but it does not help us to control others. And for me, self control is difficult enough. (I'm having to develop a forgiving sense of humor and not take myself so seriously.)

Could Yi be telling you to INVEST in WHO YOU ARE rather than in the relationship? What does he have or reflect that you could invest in for yourself and the larger world?

Click to expand...

Probably due to my own confusion and difficulty to express myself well at this level of subtlety in english this thread took a strange turn away from my wonderings... I appreciate all your views - thanks! - and now reading everything and the links I am still very unclear about unchanging Hexs but I will keep on studying how they play out in my readings. At this moment in my short path as a student I feel this: the book answers "I really cant answer that yet/right now, but go and think about this" being this the hexagram.

At a certain level I think our path together is not really determined yet, that is why so many unchanging answers. We would both have to learn some lessons, well if not him, Im sure I would.

My intuition tells me we wont get back together but that there is something else I am still not seeing - and that only time will tell.

Im not even sure what I want anymore.

trojan said:

This is quite alien to me....because surely if someone shows disinterest your ego would enable you to let them go.....to keep your pride at least. So I can't really see that trying to get him back is down to ego ....but maybe it is for you.

I'm very different. If I think there's no interest from the other then I'm gone. (maybe thats my venus in Leo kicking in) If that's ego then it's ego working for me.....To me it's never a good idea to pursue a man who is disinterested....surely ? I mean it seems very undignified for a woman to keep pursuing a man who shows no interest. So how can it be egotistical to do it ?

Click to expand...

trojan, im the same. It is not about pursuing a man who is not interested. It is accepting he is not interested and staying for whatever is there when the man-woman thing doesnt work.
I just think its pretty conditional to love someone but only if they love you back exactly in the way you need them too. Sometimes unrequited love is just too painful and there is no chance for friendship. Maybe in this case there is some value (26.6!) in giving it a chance. The book was VERY CLEAR with 59 (3,6) 48 regarding the space he has to fall back in love with me. He just wont.
Sometimes I feel the Y encourages me to just stay in his life and see what comes.

Today I was in a part of town I never go to strolling around when I had a zillion other things to do and I bumped to him on a street corner. We had to laugh, he was just arriving from the airport straight home and took the wrong bus. There was a warm hug and he said he would call later once he got his luggage home and some rest. He never did.

Trojan, he is not as bad as you paint him - he is just not interested. I can chose to have my heart broken again and again or accept that and see what stays.

I truly dont know if I want to stay friends. But Im very curious about whats in this for me, as 26.6 and 19.6 somehow point to an emotional/spiritual maturity I still very much lack.

callingcrane said:

To me it sounds like you are arriving at clarity. If you can manage to "surrender to what is" , as you say, wouldn't that be a HUGE CHANGE? And then you would know, "Yes. We can change the course of things. I can change my inability to surrender." Not so easy in my experience. The I Ching helps us with self control but it does not help us to control others. And for me, self control is difficult enough. (I'm having to develop a forgiving sense of humor and not take myself so seriously.)

Could Yi be telling you to INVEST in WHO YOU ARE rather than in the relationship? What does he have or reflect that you could invest in for yourself and the larger world?

Click to expand...

http://www.onlineclarity.co.uk/friends/showthread.php?t=12323"] this thread seems to point to a direction opposite of how I read it...

Last but not least I really resonate with callingcrane below - but I also think that the book has many lines and hexagrams that say this explicitly, it wouldnt need such a cryptic indirect way. We can always see self-growth anywhere if we have that lens. I am doing my best to do this here and really just accept what comes. But parallel to that I would love to get closer to how the book communicates and I find some of these interpretations random. (mine included!)

Can you explain me better what you mean in your last question? What do I like so much about him that I could source myself...is that it?

callingcrane said:

To me it sounds like you are arriving at clarity. If you can manage to "surrender to what is" , as you say, wouldn't that be a HUGE CHANGE? And then you would know, "Yes. We can change the course of things. I can change my inability to surrender." Not so easy in my experience. The I Ching helps us with self control but it does not help us to control others. And for me, self control is difficult enough. (I'm having to develop a forgiving sense of humor and not take myself so seriously.)

Could Yi be telling you to INVEST in WHO YOU ARE rather than in the relationship? What does he have or reflect that you could invest in for yourself and the larger world?

Click to expand...

Thanks again!
Yoana*

IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE I CAN DO THAT CAN BRING US BACK TOGETHER AS A LOVE COUPLE? 26 (3,6) 19

Your six line layout
起卦时间：2013年01月03日04时26分
神煞：天乙—子申　福星—未　日禄—午　羊刃—巳　驿马—亥　桃花—午　华盖—丑
干支：壬辰年　壬子月　己巳日　丙寅时
旬空：午未　　寅卯　　戌亥　　戌亥

六神　 伏神 　　　艮宫：山天大畜　　　　　　　　坤宫：地泽临
　　　　　　　　　【本　卦】　　　　　　　　　　　【变　卦】
勾陈　　　　　　　▅▅▅▅▅　官鬼丙寅木　　○→　▅▅　▅▅　子孙癸酉金　　
朱雀　　　　　　　▅▅　▅▅　妻财丙子水　应　　　▅▅　▅▅　妻财癸亥水　应
青龙　　　　　　　▅▅　▅▅　兄弟丙戌土　　　　　▅▅　▅▅　兄弟癸丑土　　
玄武　子孙丙申金　▅▅▅▅▅　兄弟甲辰土　　○→　▅▅　▅▅　兄弟丁丑土　　
白虎　父母丙午火　▅▅▅▅▅　官鬼甲寅木　世　　　▅▅▅▅▅　官鬼丁卯木　世
滕蛇　　　　　　　▅▅▅▅▅　妻财甲子水　　　　　▅▅▅▅▅　父母丁巳火　　
Hexagram 26 consists of 2 male line 2/6; 2 female line 1/5 and 2 third party line 3/4. For relationship analysis, line 3 and 4 are the source of interference. Line 3 and 4 person are at conflict. These two persons are not any kind of love rivals because they occupy the empty position under your house of spouse (day of reading).

Line 3 is a change line. This means another party is the obstacle. This person has taken a step backwards, but it changes to a person tightly bind to the house of marriage (interference).

Line 2 is the host line (you). You think of him, but in a give up hope sense because the line 2 officer line (male, tiger, wood) is the empty slot under the house of marriage. You do not think that you have any chance.

Line 5 is the guest line (him). He thinks of you (female, rat, water) as the person in the house of marriage. He seems to think you are associated with someone else (third party, line 3 of hexagram 19). He thinks that you are not available.

Line 2 and 5 (you and him are at odds) over certain issues.

Hexagram 26 refers to soul mates at the spiritual level and not connected as real friends at a personal level. It may be a type of relationship for the lust and not for the love at all.

Line 3 is the sibling (brother – third party ) line with a hidden line of a younger person (child line). This younger person reappears as the 6th line in hexgram 19 with one step forward. The man in line 6 is moving towards this younger person.

Who is this younger person? A child or a person younger than you.

The overall picture is extremely complex. It is sometimes hot and sometimes cold relationship.
If I must speculate, I will go against all the text section of these Iching readings. BY July/August, all things will come to an end.

Line 1 of hexagram 19 (relationship line, snake, fire) conflicts with woman in line 5 (pig, water) with the movement momentum. When the female leaves, there is no more male and female in the picture.

Lien 2 man in hexagram 19 is in conflict with the line 6 younger person. This line 6 younger person may also mean the soul of the female. One can see disagreement between the male and the female.

In conclusion, it is not a real relationship that works. There may be common interest as soul mates being apart, and not as a couple being together. To try to reach an agreement for a marriage and long term relationship, one must work very hard and try to remove all obstacles. Is it worth at the end? The answer is probably no because there is NO real, sustainable love between the two parties.

Ride the wave, and your answer will become obvious in August whether there is any chance at all.

Do not hurt yourself emotionally and learn to protect yourself in this process.

Thanks long yi - did you receive my private message?
How could I learn more about this method of interpretation?
Do you have any extra comment on 50,6 > 32?

to answer some of your questions in this complex reading of yours: (thank you again!)

long yi said:

　
Line 2 is the host line (you). You think of him, but in a give up hope sense because the line 2 officer line (male, tiger, wood) is the empty slot under the house of marriage. You do not think that you have any chance.

Line 5 is the guest line (him). He thinks of you (female, rat, water) as the person in the house of marriage. He seems to think you are associated with someone else (third party, line 3 of hexagram 19). He thinks that you are not available.

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Its true, I dont think I have a chance but emotionally I dont find closure. Time will tell, in that I agree with you.
I tend to disagree that he thinks im not available. He is the one who broke up and left. He knows I wanted to be with him.

long yi said:

　
Line 3 is the sibling (brother – third party ) line with a hidden line of a younger person (child line). This younger person reappears as the 6th line in hexgram 19 with one step forward. The man in line 6 is moving towards this younger person.

Who is this younger person? A child or a person younger than you.

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He is younger than me. Other than that, no children close to us.

long yi said:

　
If I must speculate, I will go against all the text section of these Iching readings. BY July/August, all things will come to an end.

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What do you mean? Things have ended already... In the summer we can have another perspective on our relationship, is that it?

long yi said:

　
To try to reach an agreement for a marriage and long term relationship, one must work very hard and try to remove all obstacles. Is it worth at the end? The answer is probably no because there is real, sustainable love between the two parties.

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did you mean there is NO real sustainable love? the sentence doesnt make much sense...

long yi said:

　
Ride the wave, and your answer will become obvious in August whether there is any chance at all.

Do not hurt yourself emotionally and learn to protect yourself in this process.

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Thank you...very much.
Could you just tell me how I can learn more about this method you use?
and is the 50,6 relevant at all?


Thanks*
Yoana

Typo; there is NO real, sustainable love between the two parties.
I missed the word "NO".

I received your email. I have limited time and choose to answer one question that relates to your request.

If he is younger than you, than he can be the hidden character under line 3 who reappears with a step forward in line 6 of hexagram 19.

Since this younger person is hiding under another person, if the other person is female or his mother or girl friend, he may be attached that person.

The line 3 person is earth and hidden line is metal. You can tell that he is drawing the resources of the other person. Since line 3 hidden him is the monkey metal and will be set in motion by the month of the tiger wood effective Feb 5 for about 30 days. He may release himself from the other person.

Although this is a step forward to line 6, chicken metal is weak in the spring. He is in a weak position.

This is a very complex hexagram with many change lines. I do not know what happens in between. Hexagram 19 means certain events happen not to the querent's liking in August.

You inquire about six line method.
Try reading this post: http://www.onlineclarity.co.uk/friends/showthread.php?p=170355#post170355
to learn a bit more about it.

I have tried to slowly build a website. In order to learn six line method, one must know quite a bit about Chinese Astrology, preferably knowing quite a number of Chinese character. There are a few books here and there on some basics, but they provide very limited information.

trojan said:

Shared readings seems so often to show women doubting their crystal clear perceptions the man is not right for her...or doubting his crystal clear communications that hes not interested. Thats just a general observation, which includes what i've seen in myself so it's not meant personally.....but to me it's clear this is not worth persisting in and I say that by the outstanding weight of the evidence as you have presented it.

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Trojan
You are so right! I had to laugh when i read this.
I SAW myself...

For me the Yi and all of you, people who answered me and people who posted here, were a big help, and still are, in seing things more clearly. With some detachment.
Once you asked me "what would you say if a friend told you the story you are telling us?" and at the time it was more foggy, but now it is crystal clear what you were saying.

It takes time to SEE...
But eventually on does.

And, yes, this situation brought me to the Yi... In a very strong way! So there are good things even in situations like this!

Can the future be changed

Ty Yoana, for posting this thread. Your question about whether the IChing is simply stating the situation that you are experiencing, or giving strategic advice about how to achieve a goal is one I ponder daily. Since the Yi is a book of strategy, then I have been inclined to believe the future can be changed and the IChing can advise me how to do that. As one senior member stated in a prior thread "you are supposed to win". That being the case, I spent some time analyzing how to get to Hex 11 (peace) from every other hexagram. My goal was to change every stressful situation I encountered into a peaceful one. You might ask, "how did that work for you?" LOL. It was an adventure. It led me to ask questions like "What action Should I take to get to Peace?" The problem was in the understanding and implementation of the advice.

Uau, i love this idea of getting to 11!!
How did you do it? Would you care to share what you did and how it worked?
Which hex do you use, the main one, or the relating? Both?
And practiaclly, how did it work for you?

Getting to 11

Deusa, this was the ultimate kind of control freak experiment. Why throw coins? Why not just plot it out myself? Every Hexagram has the potential to change to 11. I had the book, after all and I knew where I wanted to end up.

I would throw the coins asking "What is the reality of this situation?" If the main hex was unchanging, it was easy. I read the Hex and calculated which lines would have to change to get to Peace (11). If there were changing lines, I read the resulting Hex and read the lines that would have to change to get to Peace. The result was: 1.As a practical matter there were usually multiple changing lines which is complicated to interpret and implement. I wasn't a member of this forum at the time and didn't know anyone who could help me shed light on multiple line interpretations. And, 2. I started to question whether Peace was the best answer to all of my stressful life situations.

It occurred to me that people who memorize the Yi probably intuitively use this process in their lives. The wisdom is not restricted to throwing the coins.

Yoana, I drew the same reading in absolutely same situation. How did it turn out?