Friendship vs acquaintances

Lodestar · Feb 5, 2014

Some acquaintances/friends I had.. Have moved on, in not the nicest of ways.
I gave too much, I feel hurt.

Simultaneously I'm relieved and happy as they were immature.. And I'm always so wary of hurting others I let myself be hurt instead and don't move on when I actually want to.

I asked 'give me a picture of the way they are treating me'
I got 22.1.3.6 to 2 beauty to earth. I couldn't really understand this.

I asked the same question ' give me another picture of...
I got 29.5 to 7 repeating chasms to the army.

I'm thinking they are both saying roughly count your blessings and keep your cool?

Any thoughts on this?
Or on a better question to ask, to help me deal with feeling a bit humiliated..
Many Thanks

moss elk · Feb 6, 2014

22.1.3.6 2

I think this answer may be describing what has happened in the situation, and giving advice about it.

22: choose your friends based on values and principles rather than whatever may have drawn you to them in the start.
1: stand on your own feet and dont feel the need to ride along with them.
3: its good that they left
6: the virtue of being real and true, without pretension.

2: Losing difficult 'friends' and gaining more fruitful ones.

I think your interpretation was right.
Have you ever heard the phrase "Loving someone too much"?
Its about giving until you lose youself, or suffer losses in other ways.
We need to learn to recognize worthy recipients of our time and attention.
Another expression is ... pearls before swine
Ive experienced the same. You having a giving nature, just be more choosy about who you give to.
and chalk it up as a learning experience.

Regards.

bostonian · Feb 6, 2014

well, it's hard to know without understanding your current emotional reaction to the situation. But I think your question focuses more on what has been done to you rather than on your reaction to it. The Oracle might be telling you that even if you come to understand the current external situation, you wouldn't have really gotten to the heart of the matter which is how you deal with situations like this (which are bound to recur).
"it is not the essential or fundamental thing; it is only the ornament and therefore be used sparingly and only in little things. " So by focusing on the ornament -- the specifics of what they did to you, you might get a better understanding of what happened. But by looking more closely on your inner processes, you can better deal with a wide range of similar situations. The way to do that might be found in Hex 2: not trying to change the world around you but instead changing your mind about the world.

Or if that doesn't seem to fit, you might ask how can I be at peace with this situation?

ginnie · Feb 8, 2014

Lodestar said:
I asked the same question ' give me another picture of...
I got 29.5 to 7 repeating chasms to the army.

In 29 we see a picture of abyss followed by abyss, repeated dangers. In line 5, the water in the abyss rises up to a certain level and then stops rising. So you can feel safe and secure, having let them go. There will be no more danger from them.

sooo · Feb 10, 2014

I think 22 and given lines in this instance means they've treated you and their friendship with you lightly, which would fit into the nice aqaintences catagory. And there's nothing wrong with that. In fact it's much nicer than losing a good friend either due to death or relocation, or worse, a sad misunderstanding. Sometimes though it's a result of realization, with emphesis on real. Some people change while others reach a certain point and then stay the same for the rest of their lives, as though they've reached completion and their minds are made up - this is how it is, period. When one does that while the other continues changing throughout their life, they naturally split apart, and what was once close becomes a deep chasm, represented by 29. That doesn't mean you should dive into the chasm, just hold your own and live your own life without them. Often you can go on together as distant friends, or acquaintences.

My best friend from ages 12-16 is still a friendly aquaintance. He has his life, I have mine, and we still stay in touch and share common interests.

That's life.

Lodestar · Feb 16, 2014

Thank you all so much for your helpful replies.

.. one has just gotten in touch and asked to meet up. It's months since I've heard from her. I don't feel any urge to meet. For me I expect and need some form of regular contact or else there is no reason to maintain a relationship (unless it is an old friend) I asked IChing 'How can I honour my truth in this situation?' I got 17.1.5 to 16 Following to enthusiasm.

We have had good times of mutual support and fun, but if anything exciting arrives she drops you like a hot potato. There are qualities in this person I admire and weaknesses I really don't want to be exposed to. I know one reason can be undervalued by people is because I forgive too quickly. I am not short of people who want to be friends with me, but it's overdue for higher standards.

What is the reading saying here? Confused!

sooo · Feb 16, 2014

I see your new reading as being exactly what you've just posted. 17.5 is your higher standard, line 2 are your lesser acquaintances, and 16 describes the "she" you've just referred to.

You don't need help interpreting the Yi, you just need help in interpreting your interpretation.

Lodestar · Feb 16, 2014

Thankyou Sooo 16 totally describes her!
However I got changing line 1 rather than 2 though..
maybe the message is similar and to stick with my gut instinct?

I don't have hard feelings in the sense I see that was my stage of development at the time. But what can I reply to a direct request to meet? Is it lacking integrity to fob off (like I have been) with 'busy' excuses.. I don't feel it's the moment to say 'look too little too late' I don't really want to give them something to chew on and make me 'wrong' or 'over sensitive'. Yet I would like to come from an empowered space.

So I asked 'how can I responded to this text in an empowered rather than over-humble way?' (I'm the sort who apologises when someone steps on my foot).

I got 1.3.6 to 58
Creative force to opening

Line 3 may refer to the fact that this week I plan to do a lot of artistic work and be a bit of a hermit.
Line 6 bothers me as I am rarely arrogant and err the other way. I may be planning too much creative work this week and isolating myself. But that's not what I asked?! Warns against isolation, yet isolation and creative focus is surely better than spending time with people who don't really care about you? Emmmm....

sooo · Feb 17, 2014

Lodestar said:
Thankyou Sooo 16 totally describes her!
However I got changing line 1 rather than 2 though..
maybe the message is similar and to stick with my gut instinct?

I don't have hard feelings in the sense I see that was my stage of development at the time. But what can I reply to a direct request to meet? Is it lacking integrity to fob off (like I have been) with 'busy' excuses.. I don't feel it's the moment to say 'look too little too late' I don't really want to give them something to chew on and make me 'wrong' or 'over sensitive'. Yet I would like to come from an empowered space.

So I asked 'how can I responded to this text in an empowered rather than over-humble way?' (I'm the sort who apologises when someone steps on my foot).

I got 1.3.6 to 58
Creative force to opening

Line 3 may refer to the fact that this week I plan to do a lot of artistic work and be a bit of a hermit.
Line 6 bothers me as I am rarely arrogant and err the other way. I may be planning too much creative work this week and isolating myself. But that's not what I asked?! Warns against isolation, yet isolation and creative focus is surely better than spending time with people who don't really care about you? Emmmm....

My apology. I should have looked more closely at your first statement, where you said 17 lines 1 and 5, which change to 54, rather than lines 1 and 2 which change to 16. So forget your higher standard idea and replace it with your standard of friendship is changing, and you don't have to be seen as a big man. You still expressed your own answer in your own words.

In your second reading, I'd open up the meaning of line 6 and not worry about sounding arrogant, just speak out directly without apologizing. Of course you don't need to yell or curse at them, lol, just let them know that you're changing your standard of what it takes to be your friend. If one or two decide you're too demanding, well, your standards are up to you, just as theirs are up to them. At least the friends you'll have will be the kind you want. I think you'll be happier if you don't concern yourself so much with being liked or approved of. In the end, you have to live with yourself before others will accept you as you are.

Lodestar · Feb 17, 2014

Thankyou! Well job done! ..in a nice way and with good will, I explained I've moved on. It's feels pretty great and a relief. :bows:

...life can be translucent

Friendship vs acquaintances

Lodestar

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bostonian

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ginnie

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sooo

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sooo

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sooo

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