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hexagram 54 help

milouki

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hi everyone
i asked about the man i ve just met and the situation is complicated so i got 54 ,and the line is the third one ,that gives a change in hexagram 34.any ideas on how to interprate it?? thanks
 

moss elk

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It doesn't seem like a great situation;
Less than ideal.
Why settle for it?
 
G

goddessliss

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Sounds to me like you'd be taking something that's less than ethical - is he in another relationship?
 

Liselle

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Hilary's book (you're brand new; just in case you don't already know, Hilary Barrett is an I Ching scholar and diviner, and the owner of this website):

"Marrying maiden waiting.
Turns it round and marries as second wife."


Is there any chance you're noticing him more than he's noticing you at the moment (you said you just met)? If you were immediately very interested in him (in dating him), maybe it will take him a while to think of you in that way.

Liss makes a good point - you met him, he knows you exist, but if he's in another relationship, you have an ethical obligation to wait until that ends (if it does) to pursue your own. Hilary's commentary (possibly others) mentions "exert[ing] an indirect influence' - but that may not mean you actually DOING anything; it might just mean that he knows you exist.

As an aside, try not to take the word "marrying" too literally - no one knows when or whom you will actually marry, but most of the time in the I Ching things are metaphors. Just because the word "marrying" is in your reading doesn't necessarily mean you will marry this man.
 

milouki

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thank you
i m so new to this site ,i hope i post correctly.
he said that his ex is back and he took her in because she became homeless(situation rising here in greece due to severe austerity measures) .then he said to rethink all the matter because he doesnt know how long it will be untill she is ok ,she was also ill.we are both in retreat after that.
 

milouki

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i m astonished ,your help is immense right now because i was in a turmoil.
thank so very much.
 

milouki

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hi,thanks for answering,i guess you mean say something about the situation.well i m single for about a century or more and i met this guy through a dating site.we fell for each other by talking hours and hours and we met only to find ourselves very attracted to each other and extremely compatible.then a few days later a lot of things in our personal life got hectic and we waited out to find a proper time to meet again ,we both had to make our deadlines.a dear morning he called to say his ex appeared asking him to take her in and he did because he felt sorry for her ,they had broken up since april but it lingered on since she was very sick and he was feeling sorry for her. he said that he is very upset but maybe we should slow our pace because he is afraid that i will fell bad and cause stress to myself.he is a very protective person generally.i got freaked out but just retreated. then had another reading about how i should behave towards him and got 64 line 2 ..going to 35. well... in the meantime i see this her and decide to take some distance although painfull and see....... thank you soooooo much
 

Liselle

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well i m single for about a century or more

:rofl:

Thanks for making me laugh :D.

You're right, this is a complicated situation. He sounds like a nice man who feels empathy for people, which is nice, but it does make your situation difficult.

Just because he's letting her stay with him doesn't necessarily mean they'll get back together as a couple, although I'm sure that's what you're worried about.

After reading this additional information, I don't necessarily think it means you have to stay away altogether. The ethics of it aren't the same as if he was married or actually dating someone else.

I wonder if the reading is suggesting it would serve you best to try to be accepting of the circumstances, rather than expressing jealousy or something like that? If I'm remembering correctly, the second wife in the line furthered her own interests by NOT fighting for position.
 

jzy369

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Here is my version of 54-3 interpretation, pretty much a literal translation from original Chinese I Ching text:

"54-3 Concubine seize an opportunity to become wife, but encountered a setback and back to be a concubine. Subject seizes opportunity to seek further needs, but is disappointed to be bounced back to the previously inferior position."

To supplment the interpretation, I also need to refernce to 53-3. Again, this is pretty literal translation of original Chinese text.

"53-3: Swan goose flies further and lands on solid earth, but this is not the destination and this land is full of dangers. Subject faces misfortunes as the consequences of erroneous decisions, like man leaving for battle and not returning, like women experiencing unrighteous pregnancy. One’s mistake can cause pain to oneself and many other related parties."

Above texts seem to be pretty relevant to your situation. Hopefully they help. Comments and suggestions are welcome.
 

milouki

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thank you for great insight

the most astonishing thing for me is your level of undrstanding the book of changes.i ve been studying on my own for a million years and i m not even close to comprehension.i found my new field of study in this web site and an immense thank you to Hilary and all of you .:bows:
nevertheless i have decided to cool my self on this situation because i ve been hurt one too many times and just wait to see if this is the right guy or if we do have timing.
in this decision which i feel is the best way to go in a situation presented from the cosmos with an inherent obstacle, i am strengthened by the reading and your insights.thank you each and every one personally. sensitive people tend to be overwhelmed i guess with such little things of life like love ..
:bows:
my take on the oracle was 54!!! oh no!! ,some serius mistake is going to be repeated and my place in this realtionship is again inferior.but whta about 34? so it puzzled me.thus came your help.
 
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Liselle

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tsuch little things of life like love ..

I don't think love is a little thing - relationships are a major part of life. People can act foolishly about relationships (e.g. being hopelessly in love with someone who shows absolutely no interest in them, is happily married, and lives 1000 miles away), but even there, I don't think the person can entirely help it.

In your case, I don't think the reading is suggesting you give up on this relationship entirely, or forever, but your idea to let the situation rest for a while could be a reasonable thing to do for now. I don't think the reading is suggesting giving the man the cold shoulder, though - the "second wife" in the text was still part of the life of the household.
 

milouki

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so true Lisa.thanks. indeed relationships can be a great source of harmony and happiness. in the current greek reality though ,seem like a bit overestimated.truth is they are not. the advice you give me is the course i feel to follow .wait and see.
its his move now anyway.
 

anemos

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indeed relationships can be a great source of harmony and happiness. in the current greek reality though ,seem like a bit overestimated.truth is they are not. .

I think, being a Greek, we go through times that among other things, our relationships are tested. Some become stronger and some apparently have no substance. This is , imo, the bigger lesson we learn.

About your reading, generally speaking , 34 is in a hurry to express itself while 54 asks to slow down. What makes me wonder is whether the "concubine" of line 3 is you or his ex-wife , that she has "return"
 

milouki

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hi anemos, thank you. i preety much think that line 3 is me ,snif, and not his ex girlfriend.
he has retreated as well and i think because he is overwhelmed by two things .one is the unexpected almost encounter of a kindred soul and second his feeling of obligation to help a woman that spent with him a decade. so ....
but yes one more time the great book of changes guides me and i feel so lucky to be here and get so much help through your insights.
 

jzy369

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Interpretation For 34 Itself and 34-3

In references to earlier messages, here are the translation to 34 itself. Again, these are pretty much a literal translation from the original Chinese text:

34: At a position of strength, it is best to adhere to righteous principles and sustain the current momentum. Subject shall not irrationally venture off the current forward path.

In some I CHing augury, 34-3 is considered instead of 34 itself.

34-3: After periods of stability, unrighteous ones are accustomed to thrust forward with force, but righteous ones are cautious and worrisome, because continuing forward shall encounter entangling dangers. This is depicted as strong Ram got its sharp horns entangled with the perimeter fence.

Again, they seem to be pretty relevant to the situation you were describing. Thanks.
 

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