Hi, I posted an update to each of my previous queries last night. As many queries were about a process, the updates are also a sort of process, initiated in full form, by events of the last 2 years.

One of these had been a collision with a man and all the defences, offences and resulting fall out of the end of the affair, that was in equal part precipitated by me. Rather than move on quickly, I chose to take this year very slowly and also to give all of my feelings (obsession) full life, quietly nourishing each feeling as valid and clarifying where the feeling came from and what it would be happier being

This has been an enriching process. Today, after last night's updates on the forum, I asked what this experience with this man really represented for me now it has almost fully cleared.

So, in respect to 33.1.5 > 30:

Each step of retreating from an obsession is a cultivation and purification by recognizing that it isn't a person I've been clinging to but issues inside me.

The withdrawal is withdrawing from the conditions that resulted in the inferior presence within me (so not finding the person inferior because by what set of standards can I so omnipotently gauge someone's reasons for anything)- that working through the situation can clarify, shedding light on what had been in darkness for a long time -

In essence it is retreating from inferior elements and behaviours within me and so, finding clarity and an understanding of what I depend upon... what I admit healthily to wanting to cling to.
:bows:

Ouch, too many words/voices, head hurts.

Simple simple simple...

You wanted clarity in your reflection on the last year and the guy.

33- you retreated from an inferior man
Line 1- you've been dealing with the loose ends from the relationship. (Emotions lingering?)
Line-5 your retreat from him was a good thing, don't doubt it.

How is that?

The words aren't mine - they're copy and paste from the various translations.

Only the bolded text, at the end, are my words.

My point is that when you get obsessed with someone, realize you are not obsessed with someone else but have something sticky in you to deal with that will emerge another way if not dealt with.

Take the time to let the obsession retreat. As it retreats and you don't do anything reckless, it reveals and gives clarity to what you were concealing from yourself, about yourself.

And no, my point is don't bother examining whether someone is inferior or not. To have been involved, unless you happen to have been pure 25 (hexagram 25) YOU are entertaining inferior elements within yourself - Use the opportunity to gain clarity on what YOU are and eliminate your own inferior elements.

Obsessions aren't simple because almost certainly what you're pretending to be obsessed with is not the issue. It's just a way to avoid looking at not changing certain things about you and laying fault on circumstances or another person.

I'll delete the translations as they muddle the point.

No one thought the words were yours.

"And no, my point is don't bother examining whether someone is inferior or not."

Sure, if you want to spend your life feeling miserable with lousy people.
I have personally known murderers, rapists, and robbers.
People who, whether due to monumental stupidity, psychotic derangement, or because they took delight in causing harm to other people, qualified themselves for membership in the "inferior people" club.

I absolutely agree with you about the needing to examine and work things out of oneself:
Particularly obsessions.
That's 42 ish.

Sure, yes, there are noxiously inferior behaviors. Unless someone tells you or you learn or they're arrested, at the extreme end of the scale, you generally have to rely on a feeling.

The feeling probably repels, even if you simultaneously feel a draw. It's hardly impossible to fall in love with or become obsessed by someone with inferior behaviours. But you wouldn't often know about those secrets so it's an exhausting expense of time to try.

We can, though, see what drives an attraction and obsession in ourselves and seek out and uproot the origins so it doesn't reappear.

I agree with you that 42 is the hexagram of getting it and gaining from inside out.

I want to add that we want to be the hero of our own story. Even those that commit acts of violence against others can dress their tales with colour and renegade pride in the telling.

In coming on a forum to ask advice, we are given benefit of the doubt that our attempts to communicate with so called offending parties are done fairly.

Sometimes we are the inferior party. Sometimes that person who beats a hasty retreat does so to preserve themselves from our aggression dressed up as 'helping', 'support', truth.

At times, it is best to say little and depart knowing you will be challenged at every step and after you've gone, you'll bear the weight of the title of inferior.

Throughout our lives, when we say "he/she did this" or an overblown anxiety exists, it is useful to examine our own villany against others and ourselves in what living in anxiety denies from us of true living.

I guess it adds insult to injury to be retreated from for all the right reasons. But it is of great use to face those right reasons and recognise that we must change!

Okay