In certain situations, I find myself reverting into certain attitudes that are not desirable. I tend to feel and act like a spoiled child. What is most painful about this is that I thought that I was over it, until now. This is affecting my self esteem and I want it to stop.

So I asked, how do I avoid reverting into this attitude?
And I got 22.6 -> 36

Yesterday I asked pretty much the same question a couple of times and I got
55.4 -> 36 and
55.1 -> 62

I was also puzzled by the 55 as relating to how to act. The 36 suggests to me to keep things inside, to not act out these impulses. The 62 I interpreted as the situation. Or, could the 36 mean to just retreat from the situation that is provoking these feelings?

Thing is, I don't know how to keep things inside. Is the Yi trying to tell me how?? Can it tell me how not to have these feelings to begin with??

I also asked what to do about the situation that is producing this attitude in me and I got:
24.1 -> 2

Any help is appreciated.

Justanotherme:

36 is an eclipse of the sun - let the light shine on the darkness. You are saying it is time to stop - sounds to me it is being confirmed by the I Ching.

If you feel out of control with these impulses - you may need someone to help you.

24.1 - You are going back to an old, known cycle/pattern and 2 - you are receptive to it.

Hope that helps!
Rosalie

How to avoid reverting into this attitude?

22.6 - 36
22.6 is quite positive, I mean really, it sounds like absolute perfection to me. Then changing to ...
36 Darkening of the light.

Well, I sure agree with Rosalie that this sounds like you've got it absolutely perfectly right, it's time to put the spoiled baby to bed! (36, Darkening of the light, time for bed)

And, considering that the toss did seem to so perfectly mirror your state, I wonder if this includes a suggestion on how to keep from reverting to the old pattern. By looking at the behavior as that of a bratty kid, perhaps you can intuit what you need to do to stop it. Does this sort of pattern come up when you are overly tired or hungry or needing attention? Anyway, the fact that you are now aware of the need to change is a major first step!

55.4 Aagin the I Ching is encouraging you that your decision to change the behavior is wise.
36 Here also suggests to me that you not focus on the negative.

55.1 -62 As 55 is Clarity met with Movement, I read this as let your actions be informed by this clarity. Change line in the first place suggests you plan or think about how this new clarity will be energizes.

62. Don't try to change your whole life in one day, take it a step at a time and acknowledge your successes.

I agree with Rosalie. And if there is an actual situation producing this attitude it sounds like you are super receptive to it. You must be vigilent that you do not let negative suggestions trigger a responce. Do you smoke cigars? If not you probably aren't tempted when you see someone else light up. Have that same sort of disinterested immunity in situations that push these old buttons. (and carry a stick of gum).

Best wishes, Rosada

My last paragraph was meant to be a comment on 24.1 - 2

Thank you, Rosalie and Rosada. I appreciate your help very much. I feel better just by reading this, even if the self control to stop my impulses is still lacking a little bit. You are right, Rosalie, if I can not control them I should look for help. But I hope I will do it on my own.

" Does this sort of pattern come up when you are overly tired or hungry or needing attention?"

This sounds very funny! Like I'm actually a litle kid. But you are right, I guess, specially when I need attention. I suppose this behaviour IS and attention getter, but.. usually not the right kind of attention..

"disinterested immunity"! I like that! Yes, I guess I am letting a situation control me. But maybe because I am trying to control the situation! It sounds confusing, I know, but it's like that, a little bit.

Love both your posts, very insightful and caring. Thanks again.

Hi Justanotherme,
I'm just writing to comment that, by the way, I don't think Rosalie was on her own giving you advice to seek help, but rather saying that this is one possible interpretation of 55.4 which says, "He meets his ruler, who is of like mind". But maybe you knew that.

Anyway, I'm really writing because after posting my original thoughts I saw things from a different perspective (drat, this is happening alot lately). Could 22,6 - 36 be telling you that your so called "Spoiled chilld behavior" is not inappropriate? I mean, I guess it depends on what you're actually doing. Are you disturbed because you have a tendancy to tell people what you really think, and is the IC saying your're correct - but maybe with 36 it's telling you to keep quiet with your insights.? Like don't call the boss a codfish - even though it's true? If this is the case, maybe that's why you're encouraged to talk to someone of "like kind." Maybe a friend can tell you if you're behavior is indeed all that out of line - it may not be!

Okay, just thought I'd stir the ting abit!

Agreeing with Rosadas post above. Before you see yourself so much at fault think about it carefully. For myself I see a lot of times blaming of the self was unhelpful and loving and understanding of the self as if it were another helps so much it can effortlessly eradicate the 'bad' behaviour anyway. Sometimes 'bad' behavior can almost be used to punish ourselves as if displaying to ourselves we are unworthy.
36 may be the context of the question rather than its result. I see it as having to repress and hide ones true feelings in order to survive. This is something alot of us have to do growing up. 22, 6 is not hiding anymore, going simply, being yourself. Maybe you have thought being your natural self was bad or undesirable ?

55 is hard to understand here, though it does advise not to fret but to shine like the sun at noon. Overall I kinda get the feeling Yi doesn't think you are as bad as you think you are, but then i don't know how bad you've been

Justanotherme

Just in case the commentarie could be useful

1.- Before knowing how remediate something, one needs to know the cause of the "spoiled" situation.

2.- Sometimes, the key is not "how to avoid having X feeling (or actitude)" but "how to handle X feeling (or actitude)".

3.- "Fire under Mountain doens't lights in long distance: you can use it to inlight small matters, but not serious matters" (Commentarie of the Image of 22, about how to act in Grace's Time). You need something more than the present aproach

4.- You need to understand that you can not just "decorate" inner reality (line 6 of 22)

5.- Your goal must be an inner work to choose what is right and put away what is wrong: put the darkness out of you (36)

So, one question from the "22.6 answer" is: how much you are commitment with the inner work of solve that actitude? There is nor cosmetic, neither external nor easy solutions to achieve your goal.

Best wishes

Yes thinking about it further its as if what was dark and hidden is coming to light. Its come to the light of your attention and can now be successfully and simply dealt with.

Just - my 2 cents

36 can also imply inhibition
22.6 is unfiltered energy

So the direction is not going inward but allowing to come out.

Just,

Perhaps the spoiled child behaves poorly because he/she isn't being listened to, so he/she makes a lot of noise to draw attention. The more you stuff this child away into a box, the more it cries and carries on.

By 'filters' I mean those things which alter the original impulses of the mind and heart - just as colors appear when filtered through a prism. 22.6 is clear (pure) light, which can only shine through once the causes and conditioning that reinforce this behavior are found and removed.

55 takes action. It's hard to hide from the noon day sun.

I agree with Rosada on 62. This is accomplished in small steps, dealing with small details, observing calmly and choosing what to inhibit and what to allow to act out, and how. Not in one fell swoop.

Void, I really like your take on this. I don't think that I keep my feelings to myself all that much. I think it's the opposite, I tend to express even the fleeting ones, the ones not processed yet perhaps, and that can sometimes be a problem. But I agree that there might be some self appreciation issues, maybe I am not as bad as I think I am! In fact, it's interesting, because in this particular situation I have found a lot of patience and understanding, it's mostly me complaining about me... but I do act in undesirable ways.

Jessed: "Sometimes, the key is not "how to avoid having X feeling (or actitude)" but "how to handle X feeling (or actitude)".
I agree! We can't really control our feelings, they just have to be dealt with. And maybe this is why this can be so confusing, because my approach is wrong. It's not about suppressing but about handling them..

And Bruce! I think you give me the solution.
"I agree with Rosada on 62. This is accomplished in small steps, dealing with small details, observing calmly and choosing what to inhibit and what to allow to act out, and how. Not in one fell swoop."
And, of course, a great insight about having to figure out how to pacify the 'child'... lol It's a tough job, figuring out how to do that.
You know what I think, I think that the irrational behaviour perpetuates itself by making the child feel bad about itself and therefore making it behave bad again. Over and over...

I wonder if many people feel this way sometimes and they just handle it real well. I wonder if the 'pathology' is in the impulse or only in the action.

In any case, I will try to go the 62 way and to observe and choose, observe and choose... and from time to time, act it out... Thanks to everyone.

This is what I got regarding 55:
----------------------------
Thunder and lightning symbolize a brief period in which we are able to have an influence on others When this influence wanes we must withdraw without delay and no longer focus interest on the situation. (From Anthony)
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I read that as - There is a window of opportunity for influencing (this behavior.) You need to know when to influence and know when it is not the right time.

Based on your situation Moonrise - I would say you need to influence this behavior before it gets too late. You seem to have the window of opportunity now - and not to let it pass you by - and to Bruce and Rosada's point - don't try to do everything at once - small steps that are thorough and well done (#62).

Rosalie

Oops - I meant to address this to Justanotherme.
I must have had Moonrise's post on my mind!

Rosalie