16.4.6 to 23

ok, i know i need to go to him and ask directly. but in the meantime ..... i just learned some information that makes it very possible xx (who i wrote about over the last few days) may have told me a significant mistruth about his family. i am shocked. i can't help but wonder if this isn't the 8th month misfortune? so i asked yi a question, not a very clearly crafted question: "i need some feedback about whether or not xx lied to me?" my answer is an enthusiastic splitting apart, 16-23.

please push back, give me feedback, tell me to not bother interpreting this and go to the source, suggest a better worded question, something - anything, i'm just so disappointed.

16.6 talks about awakening from a false enthusiasm and this being a good thing. does this mean i'm waking up from believing this was a great guy to learn that's he's actually a liar? it could also be, given how i understand the lie, he wasn't mistruthful about himself directly, but was mistruthful about others. maybe there is a good reason for this?

16.4 advises not to doubt, and not to be suspicious, but to gather friends together. maybe i'm being told to hold off on making decisions until i know more information?

Hi Millie

Just in case the comment could be useful

When one ask unfair questions about others, Yi Jing answer talks not about the situation or the other person; but talks TO YOU, as an adevice.

16, you are leaded by enthusiasmic; 23 you need to take a step back, take some distance to view better the situation.

I would suggest this order of question (from general to concrete):
1.- General diagnosis of my relationship whit xx
2.- How you do qualify mi position within the relationshp?
3.- How doy you qualify xx's position within the relationship?
4.- How should I act related to my relationship with xx?

Each answer must be understand at the light of the previous answers. It means, don't ask the 4 question together: Ask the first, and understanding it; only then, with the previous answers as context, do the next question and understanding it.. and so on


Hope this exercise give you more clarity.

Best wishes

jesed, thanks for this good help. i'm just reading up on 23 and have come to a somewhat similar conclusion. this is advice for me and how i'm handling this situation. i was first quick to interpret this in the most negative way, but also see the other side now. my intuition is telling me i don't have anough information to really know anything. the lines are suggesting i should not doubt and should keep friends near, and stop getting caught up in this potential lie. but what needs to be stripped away and lost? this line of thinking on my part? i'm just going to hold tight for a moment. i like your suggestion of questions very much, but i'm going to wait before using yi any further becuase i think i just need to talk to him.

I think that the second hexagram is often not a part of the answer but more a reflection/image of the question and the state of mind or situation of the questioner.
In this case it may reflect your disappointment as well as your intention to discover the "naked truth".

Yes you are right its time you communicated with him not the Yi. For all you know 16,6 here could mean you latched onto the new information too enthusiastically.
And 16,4 is a pretty strong statement that trust is correct.

Just go ahead and communicate with him. I think it will now be a better way than consulting Yi about it. If you keep on asking the Yi or other people about it you're not getting at his reality. I hope it turns out how you want - and if it doesn't you know its because theres something a million times better round the corner. Sounds trite but its true.

I see 16 as your excitable nature over this. Line 4 is free of doubt, and therefore holds everything together. Line 6 is extreme visions, either of grandeur or catastrophic failure. 23 strips (seeing through or beyond) both phantasmagoric influences, perhaps putting things into realistic perspective.

A mutual decision is all that?s required, the guru told you. That does require open and completely honest communication. Phantoms are born out from the unknown.