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Relationship Potential ughh

herrmyte

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I posted what was for me a long standing question a few weeks ago and the feedback was very helpful. So I have one more big question in my life right now. A little background: I was a grad student instructor and after the semester a student seemed to show interest and I was so I contacted her to see about meeting. We emailed a bit and had a meeting for coffee on campus set up. (She had since went on to grad school at a nearby campus) The entire situation had me way off my equilibrium and I canceled the meeting since I was in the midst of a hectic semester where I needed to do well and I was afraid of emotional turmoil being fairly new to dating and such strong feelings. I was also leery because she had just got out of a 'very intense and long' relationship and didnt want to be a rebound. So contact stopped for @ 6 months until earlier this year. I was graduating and leaving for Buenos Aires for the summer so I thought I should finally pursue things. We met for coffee and had dinner. We emailed afterward but never made it out again before I left. She invited me out with her friends after but I balked/chickened out. However I finally asked where things stood and she seemingly, or actually, ended it by saying that she didnt sense any chemistry between us. That killed but subsequent emails were much more honest and with definite exchange of affection. Midsummer I replied to her last email and sent some pictures. I got no response so I figured OK fine its all over. But a few weeks ago since Im back in the country, and for the most part over it, she contacts me again. So over email I find out shes now in a relationship but seems to have questions about it. Our bouts of long emails seem to be over for this round and things are at a standstill. So I asked:

What is the outcome if I release hope for a relationship with X? 43.4 to 5

Is X interested in pursuing contact towards a relationship? 43.0 Unchanging

Why did she contact me at all? 34.3.5.6 to 10

What is her position? 17.2.4 to 60

What is my position? 28.0 Unchanging

My situation feels too unstable to try to 'steal her away' right now but Im just wondering if thats a possibility. If not and shes just seeking a sort of friendship fine at least it would ease my mind. I should also add that there have been a few synchronicities surrounding the situation that keep me thinking I should pursue her. But apologies for the long post. Some help interpreting the reading would sincerely be appreciated. Thanks all
 

bamboo

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Hi Herr,

43.4> 5 seems to say there is not much choice in the matter.

as far as why she contacted you, the 34> 10 seems to reflect what she said to you: she feels stuck and uncertain about her current position with the new guy.
I dont really like the sound of "her position".......It makes me question her motives for contactng you, and you are understandably stressed by it.

I rather thnk the 43.0 advises you to take heed of what she said already. "No chemistry" is disappointing for you, but really hear what she said, and don't waste your time. There are a lot of other fish in the sea, and you sound like a guy with a lot going for him. I wish you well!
 

willowfox

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What is the outcome if I release hope for a relationship with X? 43.4 to 5

This says that you would really like to make this happen, your mind is in a whirl but the best advice is to back off and wait because at the moment there is absolutely nothing that you can do to change anything, fate is against you at the moment.

Is X interested in pursuing contact towards a relationship? 43.0 Unchanging

Yes, something is brewing in her head but listen again to the advice of your last answer, wait, let her do the action.

Why did she contact me at all? 34.3.5.6 to 10

Perhaps because she knows that you are there, perhaps because she does not like the relationship she is now in and wants out.

What is her position? 17.2.4 to 60

It looks like she has involved herself with some kind of stupid and feels stuck.

What is my position? 28.0 Unchanging

Like I said before you want to do something but can't, you are going to have to wait but in the meantime be friendly when she emails but channel your energy into work.
 

herrmyte

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Thanks bamboo and willowfox, the interpretations ring true and gave some confirmation and relief. Ive felt both ways..but I just got another email. Ill try to keep my wits, keep it low key (im not into triangles) and just see what develops. Again, thanks very much
 

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