Hi forum friends,

There's a possibility that I may be reuniting with my ex fiance, a wonderful Spanish man I have been in an on-off (often long distance) relationship for almost 10 years. 6 months ago, right before our wedding, I flipped out, broke off the relationship and ran away to South East Asia with a man a barely knew. I have a habit of sabotaging my happiness, I guess, and throughout my life I have had a real problem with commitment in general. Now, I really would like to patch it up with him and try again. I want to change these patterns in my life. anyway we got...

14 Possession in great measure,
changing 2: A big wagon for loading.
One may undertake something.
No blame.

and 3: A prince offers it to the Son of Heaven.
A petty man cannot do this.

to 21 Biting Through

Seems like a lot of work, maybe not even possible at all?? Not really what I would consider "highest good" kind of lines.. But I sincerely would like to try.
Is it a good sign?

I think it is saying that you have great power over the man in question, or at least a lot to offer him, so you can go forward and approach him knowing that he will be interested... But I think it's also warning you that you shouldn't use this to your advantage i.e. as you were the one to leave him, perhaps you should be the one to offer more, and make more of an effort with him... as it says in 14.3:
"He is harmed by great possessions, because instead of sacrificing them, he would keep them for himself"

Changing to 21 could perhaps be saying there is great power and momentum in the relationship, but perhaps don't move too fast or with too much force or expectation or pressure, as you may break something?
Or perhaps saying that you can bite through to the truth of the relationship if you make a sincere commitment to him, and break through your fears of being tied down?

Hope that when you next see him it goes well and that he truly is the man for you.
I can relate to what you said about feeling like you're sometimes sabotaging your happiness, but I just think you can't ignore your feelings... and as you have kept in touch it showes theres more to the relationship than romance, there's friendship there too which in my opinion is more valuable, and it shows mutual understanding and tolerance of difference between the two of you which can only be good You have probably both changed and grown, but hopefully, as the reading suggests, you can share what you have learnt and give to him again...

Good luck!
:bows:

Thanks for your comment... well I've continued contact with him, called him a few times. But today he said he doesn't want me to call him anymore. He is starting a relationship with another woman. I can't blame him, I guess. But I am distraught. I feel as though I have critically messed up my potential for happiness in this life. Maybe I am crazy, but I just can't believe it's over.
Asked the I ching again if there was hope,

42. 1, 2 --> 59
Increase
Nine at the beginning means:
It furthers one to accomplish great deeds.
Supreme good fortune. No blame.

If great help comes to a man from on high, this increased strength must be
used to achieve something great for which he might otherwise never have
found energy, or readiness to take responsibility. Great good fortune is
produced by selflessness, and in bringing about great good fortune, he
remains free of reproach.

° Six in the second place means:
Someone does indeed increase him;
Ten pairs of tortoises cannot oppose it.
Constant perseverance brings good fortune.
The king presents him before God.
Good fortune.

A man brings about real increase by producing in himself the conditions for
it, that it, through receptivity to and love of the good. Thus the thing for
which he strives comes of itself, with the inevitability of natural law. Where
increase is thus in harmony with the highest laws of the universe, it cannot
be prevented by any constellation of accidents. But everything depends on his
not letting unexpected good fortune make him heedless; he must make it his
own through inner strength an steadfastness. Then he acquires meaning
before God and man, and can accomplish something for the good of the
world.


To dissolution.

??? Is it there, hope?

And so...
Well, many months have passed since I posted this thread, and good news...my sweetie did come around. He came back to Cali and we've made a lot of progress in our relationship. The moment he called me to tell me he had left her a huge rainbow appeared outside my door. Incredible.
Since he came we've been seeing a therapist, which has helped a great deal to improve our communication and deepen our connection. In retrospect, I feel 14.2 was a reference to having the opportunity and the cash flow right now to be able to have a good therapist. And 42.1, 2 was the obvious reference to the certain continued karma with this man. I guess the rainbow could have been saying that as well...
Anyway, just thought you all would like a little post feed back, hope it's helpful.