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tess

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This is going to be very vague but that means I just expect vague assistance which is ok with me because sometimes thats what I need. I have a tendency to look too closely at every detail that when someone gives me a general overview or a holistic idea of a situation, something clicks or becomes clearer for me so any feedback is appreciated.

I have been feeling like I have been doing a lot of waiting in the recent past and that now I am nearing a crossroads so my very vague question was "Where should I go from here?" Answer=33.4.6 to 39
Ok, obviously I need to willingly retreat from something even though it will lead to hardship.

Then I asked "Who or what should I retreat from?" Answer=44.1.2.4.5.6 to 36
This creates some confusion. I read this like a series of events and that makes sense because events in a certain area of my life read similar to the moving lines in 44 and the resulting line of 36. What I am unsure of is am I suppsoed to retreat from the person that the 44 represents or is it saying that I should stop darkening my light now? I haven't been with this person for almost a year now because of outside circumstances but we have talked at times throughout and both still feel very strongly about the other. I don't know if I am supposed to retreat from the situation as a whole, namely 44>36, and stop hiding my feelings and waiting to be with him, or if I am supposed to retreat from the person which would cause me to have to hide (or deny) my feelings for him which means I should darken my light. 44 isn't really seen as a positive hexagram for relationships but there is part of Wilhelm's translation that sounds mroe hopeful.

"Although as a general rule the weak should not come to meet the strong, there are times when this has great significance. When heaven and earth come to meet each other, all creatures prosper; when a prince and his official come to meet each other, the world is put in order. It is necessary for elements predestined to be joined and mutually dependent to come to meet one another halfway. But the coming together must be free of dishonest ulterior motives, otherwise harm will result"
-Wilhelm

Also this thread made so much sense to me, at least in this case.
http://www.onlineclarity.co.uk/friends/showthread.php?t=2649

Finally I asked "What is the proper action to take towards successfully accomplishing this retreat?" Answer=35.6 to 16.
I guess this means I need to just do it and be enthusiatic about it but not forceful.

Any takers? :)
 

my_key

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Hi Tess
You look to have identified something important too you in your opening paragraph, and your opening interpretation. Here's a starter for 10 with the other two Q's you posed to the Yi. I have tried to prod a little here so I hope that you will not find it too blunt.
Then I asked "Who or what should I retreat from?" Answer=44.1.2.4.5.6 to 36
44 - Old habits are coming back to bite you if you are not careful.
44.1 - Even the smallest of poor behavious can grab a strong foot hold. Look closely at how you really are now after all that has gone on recently.
44.2 - How you are acting now is keeping something under lock and key. Is it the real you?
44.4 - Are you too remote? Choosing how to behave to allow people into your Team would be to your advantage.
44.5 - Are you being too sensitive? Perhaps you are trying to gain approval for things in the wrong manner. Do you really need other peoples approval to do what you think is right?
44.6 - Putting on that brave face may not be all that you need for the future. Allow things to grow and take shape and stop banging your head against the brick wall.

36 - The wounded child needs all the support that you can muster for it at the moment. Being compassionate and considerate will take you down the right track.

Finally I asked "What is the proper action to take towards successfully accomplishing this retreat?" Answer=35.6 to 16.
35 - You are on the way up if you are open minded and accomodating, while see things for what they are. This a great opportunity for you.

35.6 - Look closely at your own attitudes and behaviours , but there is no need to beat yourself up. Quoting from Desiderata "Do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and lonliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself."

16 -Enthusiam brings positive results.

Be well

Mike
 
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Trojina

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The 'who or what ' you should retreat from was in the first answer..33>39 retreat from difficulties..whatever you are expereincing in your life as 39 right now, the hard lonley raod..retreat from the struggle.
 

tess

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Thank you my_key and trojan for your insight.

Everything seems to be a hardship right now but most of everything seems to stem from my relationships. There are two people that I have been with in the past with whom I am dealing right now. I feel very platonic towards one but he can't be friends with me because his feelings are too strong. I am currently working on things with him but still have very strong feelings (which may be too intense and unstable for a relationship) for the other one who lives at a great distance from me. I am torn between doing the right thing by the guy I am with (let's call him A) and the one I feel strongly towards (let's call him B). I feel like I owe A to be with him and see if things will work out because it ended badly the first time and I do care about him a lot. Also we have a very special bond that I know is based on something true and firm and deep. B, although I feel so much for him on every level, creates much fear in me because my feelings are so intense and impulsive (both positively and negatively) and I am not sure if the feelings have duration or if they are equally reciprocated (although I do know that he wants to be with me and that he cares very much for me but I am just not sure if it comes from a deep and lasting place) and I am afraid of hurting someone very precious to me for something that isn't good for me. I suppose my biggest problem is trying to do what is right for my head and A by giving things another shot, and yet remaining true to my heart and doing right by B without letting it lead us all needlessly into a possibly hurtful situation. I suppose I am just trying too hard to control everything but I am trying to stay "central and correct" as the I Ching says. Its a VERY hard path to follow.

I did some more readings on this specifically. I asked the I Ching to give me some insight that will help me to know what to do in my situation with A and B. It answered 62.1.5 to 49.
Then I asked "What is the proper action to take according to this last reading?" It answered 29.2.5 to 2.
I feel the need to send B an email but am not sure about how to approach it so I asked the I Ching what I should say to him and it answered 50.1.2.3 to 21.
I also asked what the proper action to take with B is and received 57.3.5.6 to 7.
Finally I asked if I belonged with B and received 37.3 to 42.

I would really appreciate some more input on these readings. Am I asking the right questions?

Thanks again.
 

my_key

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Hi Tess
I asked the I Ching to give me some insight that will help me to know what to do in my situation with A and B. It answered 62.1.5 to 49.

Be modest and stay consistent in the way you conduct yourself- this will help you to understand. Don't try to run before you can walk. But equally don't let this make the picture too bleak for you - follow your heart. This will allow you to let loose the thing that has been holding you back.

Then I asked "What is the proper action to take according to this last reading?" It answered 29.2.5 to 2.

You are having to learn some lessons here. So weather the storm and stay calm and composed. Take it all one step at a time, don't get ahead of yourself. All good things come to those who let them in.

I feel the need to send B an email but am not sure about how to approach it so I asked the I Ching what I should say to him and it answered 50.1.2.3 to 21.

Honour yourself - Do things and say things in a way that are right for you. Look deep within you this is an opportunity to clear away the dross. Focus on what it is you want to achieve. Let it all out emotionally so that you can see who you really are and what you really want. This may be tough, but keep on digging until you get to the bottom.

I also asked what the proper action to take with B is and received 57.3.5.6 to 7.
Take it slow and easy. Decide how you feel and stick to it. You may have struggled to get a clear picture, but once things are clear you'll know what is right for you, so stick to it. Don't over analyse your decision. By lining up your ducks and being honest you will really see the best of the situation.

Finally I asked if I belonged with B and received 37.3 to 42.
What you feel on the inside will be mirrored on the outside. Freedom to be yourself, mutual trust and respect are the foundations of a good relationship. Understanding this will allow you both to grow and develop emotionally.
Am I asking the right questions?
Who can say!!!. We all have the answers - remember these are my answers to your questions. Finding the right answers to the right questions can be really tricky. Sometimes too many questions can muddy the waters. Have you thought that spending more time with one question may lead you to the thing you are looking for.
Be Well
Mike
 
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tess

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Thanks so much Mike. Your insights really help me to see past the literal details of the hexagrams and lines that can confuse me. I really appreciate you taking the time to help clarify these readings for me. :)
All the best.
 

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