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36,6 > 22 Deadlock and misery

U

usilser

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Here is a summary of my life story of the last 10 years...

The last 10 years of my life have been very rough. Relationships with unsuitable selfish partners. Living at an unsuitable place for me. A lot of indifferent moments nothing really happy to remember. Perhaps I have to accept a life like this or leave from here. If I do so, I have to abandoned my family and a business that I love (I manage, the only thing that makes me smile, it is not mine) but my life here does not make me happy. I can't even find a suitable partner here, I haven't got friends and I haven't got the quality of life I want. You see I live in a very small closed society and the men are limited. After 10 years of misery my patience seems to end and I don't know what to do. Should I stay or should I go? and where could I go?

How could I avoid all this misery how could I change my life?
36.6 - 22

This is the last line of hexagram 36 darkness - injury etc etc... Perhaps the darkness will come to an end and beautiful moments are coming (my wish)... I am not sure of course... Could you please help me to understand what is the advice of line 6? Is there anything I can do to get out of the dead end?
 
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becalm

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I've always found this line hard to interpret but I feel it's saying the Beauty is Within You. It also looks like the dark times are coming to an end.
PS when I read your last 10 years I felt like I was reading about myself
 
U

usilser

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It's sad becalm that you feel like my life story is your story too. I feel ashamed about sharing my story but I really looking for a way out of this... Time passes and I 'lost' a lot of years of waiting a change.

What I am thinking about 36.6 is that the line shows that I was capable to change my life but I made the wrong decisions that made me unhappy. For example, I am at this place because of my parents and the fear to leave them alone but mostly about their reaction if I leave them (my sister did and it was a nightmare for years till to accept it) and the true is sometimes they do not appreciate me. I am a highly educated person, beautiful with a very strong personality, sometimes I wonder how I could do that to me.
 
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becalm

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I am a highly educated person, beautiful with a very strong personality, sometimes I wonder how I could do that to me.
So many times I've thought that when I've found myself in less than ideal situations. but I'm learning, usiler. In the past couple of weeks I've spoken up, said exactly what's on my mind to people who could essentially change my life in a way I may have no control over but I just thought too bad I have to stop living in fear and whatever way things fall, they fall but at least I'll be being true to myself.
 

mandarin_23

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Hello usilser, 36.6 says that the dark times will come to its end or is at is ending, and it also advises you about how to cope with suppression and difficulties in outer life, how to keep your inner glow! 36.6. says, as far as I know, that the good will be restored.
And then, Beauty as a relating hexagram. You are beautiful, and the best way to cope with depression might be to see the beauty of life. There is a strong element of seeing in the relating hexagram, the Image is the fire under a mountain.
All the very best, Mandarine
 
U

usilser

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In the past couple of weeks I've spoken up, said exactly what's on my mind to people who could essentially change my life in a way I may have no control over but I just thought too bad I have to stop living in fear and whatever way things fall, they fall but at least I'll be being true to myself.

Believe me, this is what I do for years! I speak up again and again but the people (my parents) do not give me attention to what I am saying and it seems that they really don't care if I am happy here or not. They care only to be here for them. Selfish love, right? I really don't know what I must do.
 

my_key

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Hi Usiler
Your story of the last 10 years shows the misery that your life has become. There is a clearer understanding beginning to emerge that this is related to some of the decisions you have made where you have put others before yourself and shied away from the potential conflict of taking other actions. Your parents and their reactions seem to be central to the decisions you have made in the past and are influencing you as you look forward.

You question to me seems to be two questions in one, however the advice seems to answer both
How could I avoid all this misery how could I change my life?
36.6 - 22


Hex 36 means outcast; Hex 22 means you begin without a face.

To my way of interpreting the divination you made, Yi is saying the misery could not be avoided. It is a misery (death?) that you had to experience to bring you to a place where you can begin again. You can now choose what to write / draw on that blank page in front of you. From what you have been through, you know full well how to walk the path that tarnishes you and makes you miserable, so equally now you know exactly how not to walk that path.

Line 6 is pointing you towards the new way for you. The time is ripe for this. Adopt an approach where you take a step and aim for Heaven and then pausing and reflecting, working through the consequences of your step. From the hardships that you have experienced you will discover how best to proceed. Perhaps any step you take now will be the best step as this could well be a journey of a thousand miles for you. With it though you become the painter of your blank canvas and will create the face that you present to the world and the face that the world shines back to you.

Good Luck
 
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U

usilser

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Hello usilser, 36.6 says that the dark times will come to its end or is at is ending, and it also advises you about how to cope with suppression and difficulties in outer life, how to keep your inner glow! 36.6. says, as far as I know, that the good will be restored.
And then, Beauty as a relating hexagram. You are beautiful, and the best way to cope with depression might be to see the beauty of life. There is a strong element of seeing in the relating hexagram, the Image is the fire under a mountain.
All the very best, Mandarine

Thank you Mandarin for the hope that you give me with your post.
To be honest I feel like depressed but I am not, my problems are really clear to me, I know very well what I should change but I don't know which way to follow.
 

foxx777

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Here is a summary of my life story of the last 10 years...

The last 10 years of my life have been very rough. Relationships with unsuitable selfish partners. Living at an unsuitable place for me. A lot of indifferent moments nothing really happy to remember. Perhaps I have to accept a life like this or leave from here. If I do so, I have to abandoned my family and a business that I love (I manage, the only thing that makes me smile, it is not mine) but my life here does not make me happy. I can't even find a suitable partner here, I haven't got friends and I haven't got the quality of life I want. You see I live in a very small closed society and the men are limited. After 10 years of misery my patience seems to end and I don't know what to do. Should I stay or should I go? and where could I go?

How could I avoid all this misery how could I change my life?
36.6 - 22

This is the last line of hexagram 36 darkness - injury etc etc... Perhaps the darkness will come to an end and beautiful moments are coming (my wish)... I am not sure of course... Could you please help me to understand what is the advice of line 6? Is there anything I can do to get out of the dead end?
I think 36.6 > 22 is talking about a transformation. The life you’ve lived the past 10 years needs to die. Your “darkened light” will now give way to 22.6: unadorned beauty and simplicity.
 
U

usilser

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There is a clearer understanding beginning to emerge that this is related to some of the decisions you have made where you have put others before yourself and shied away from the potential conflict of taking other actions. Your parents and their reactions seem to be central to the decisions you have made in the past and are influencing you as you look forward.

Exactly!


Line 6 is pointing you towards the new way for you. The time is ripe for this. Adopt an approach where you take a step and aim for Heaven and then pausing and reflecting, working through the consequences of your step. You become the painter of your blank canvas and can create the face that you present to the world and
The thing is I don't know which approach to follow. That's why I asked the question.
 

my_key

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The thing is I don't know which approach to follow. That's why I asked the question.
Only you will be able to discover which approach is the right one for you. It is tough right now yet hex 36 says 'Constancy in hardship bears fruit'. So paint this quality and sit with all this hardship until a chink of light becomes visible and you feel able to walk towards that. Hex22 (the context in which all this is enquiry is unfolding) is about displaying courage too. Be brave!

Good Luck
 
F

Freedda

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usilser, I see at least two levels of meaning with 36 ...

First, it seems to be describing a cyclic 'darkening of the light' which has been happen every day for billions of years - and will likely continue for a few billion years more: every evening the sun dips below the horizon and 'goes within the earth' - and at every given moment it is happening, right now, somewhere on this orb we call home.

This seems be be quite well described in 36.6:

Instead of light, (there is) darkness
At first rising into the sky
But at last going into the earth (again, and again, and ...)

Or, in other words ... sometimes we are in the light and sometimes we are in darkness - and perhaps too sometimes it is best to embrace that darkness - which is altogether different than being depressed or down, or feeling trapped.

The other level of meaning is more personal, as Cyrille Javary's name implies, to be 'Enshrouding Oneself'. It is about turning inward, either for protection or as a strategic choice - as an artist might chose to not show her work until she's ready to show it - e.g. we 'hide our light' for lots of different reasons.

And as you feel (perhaps rightly so) that outward options are closed to you, maybe it means to look inward, which some might call a meditative, or even a therapeutic, or spiritual, or healing, or curative approach. (One image I have of this is taking shelter within Gaia, within the Earth - which might also be a dark place, but not one that is unaccepting or unsupportive.)

Best, D.
 

moss elk

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You see I live in a very small closed society and the men are limited.

So, is it a religious cult or commune?


Freedda,
I think 36.6 is much worse than the natural cycle of day and night that you described. It's a direct reference to the evil emperor Zhou of Shang.
 
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Freedda

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Freedda, I think 36.6 is much worse than the natural cycle of day and night that you described. It's a direct reference to the evil emperor Zhou of Shang.
Perhaps you are right, but not knowing the 'back story,' and taking the Yi at face value, I don't read such a dire message into this line. In fact there are no 'dire' or 'negative' words in the line text that I'm seeing. (I've also read that the various back stories - including about the evil emperor Zhou - are possible, but not necessarily agreed-upon associations for this line).

On the other hand, a more Confucian take on 36.6 talks about 'At last going into the earth: Disregarding due order', which seems to suggest to me that perhaps one's hiding of the light is not part of the natural order of things - but maybe still necessary or the best course of action?

Looking too at the upper trigrams, we have Earth in the principal hexagram moving to Mountain in the related, which suggest to me an earthly but still approach - maybe a.k.a. looking inward.

All that said, even if line 36.6 was about something 'darker' or more evil, what do you think Yi's advice is, about a way around this situation, or the way to deal with it? I'd still say the advice is to 'look within' (which sounds a bit simplistic, but I mean something with a bit more substance), but that's just my take on it.

Best, D.
 
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moss elk

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Well the main advise of 36 is to hide your light, and the situation is one where persistence is difficult.
That is a pretty powerful statement:
persistence is difficult.
It worse than, the situation is annoying.


Think of something that had great promise to begin with, rose to prominence, but ended up in darkness and fell. If this is an 'intentional community', then maybe it describes the state of it at this time.
 

moss elk

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All that said, even if line 36.6 was about something 'darker' or more evil, what do you think Yi's advice is here about a way around this situation, or the way to deal with it?

I do not think this line carries 'advice' per se,
like most other lines do.
I think it just shows a picture of the situation.

About evil,
imagine if you asked my opinion about someone that I knew, that you didn't.
If the first words from my mouth in response began with, "No light, only darkness."
Would you sit up an pay attention?
 
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Freedda

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Well the main advise of 36 is to hide your light, and the situation is one where persistence is difficult.
That is a pretty powerful statement: persistence is difficult ... It worse than, the situation is annoying.

Think of something that had great promise to begin with, rose to prominence, but ended up in darkness and fell. If this is an 'intentional community', then maybe it describes the state of it at this time.
I think Usilser will have to respond for us to know for sure, but the sense I get is she's talking about a small town or community in a country or society that might be more conservative and 'closed' than the US is (though we do have those aspects) - but not necessarily an intentional community; but that's just my guess.

Again, I'm just exploring here, but the version of 36 that I'm looking at says:

36.0, Brightness Obscured
Warranting difficult persistence ....​

That to me says things are difficult, but not necessarily evil - and more importantly, that it's a situation that - with some persistence - can be worked with.

But setting aside my take on this, what do you think the advice is from the Yi for Usilser to address her situation?

D.
 

moss elk

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Imagine if you were talking to someone describing your problem, and they mirrored the situation to you with a hearty, "well, that really sucks."

The ball is placed back in your court to decide what you want to do.

Unless... She was placed in this prominent situation by the family, with high hopes for her, and she one day says, "screw it, i'm out of here." and goes off to greener pastures.
The family would see her as the bad guy.
Although, she would not be the bad guy in reality.
 
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B

becalm

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Believe me, this is what I do for years! I speak up again and again but the people (my parents) do not give me attention to what I am saying and it seems that they really don't care if I am happy here or not. They care only to be here for them. Selfish love, right? I really don't know what I must do.
I know but it’s then taking action at the others response.
If the other person doesn’t validate how we feel or our a opinion and you accept that then why would things change.
It’s about speaking up and then taking action based on the response. You say no ones listening to what YOU want or need then you do have to ask YOURSELF why you stay.
Yesterday I told my boss she handled my recent bullying complaint very badly and in a very untimely manner and I’m considering resigning.
Her response oh well that’s up to you.
My response ok I’ll have a think about this conversation and make my decision over the weekend.
I can’t really afford to leave my job but I can’t stay there either but at least now I know where I stand and can take action with clarity.
 

foxx777

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I do not think the line contained any advice.
Line 6 of 36 has always seemed a judgment: The evil emperor who might have given light to the four corners of the earth has broken heaven’s decree and is plunged into darkness. Sounds like her parents, and that the time has come for her to leave. @usilser
 

foxx777

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I know but it’s then taking action at the others response.
If the other person doesn’t validate how we feel or our a opinion and you accept that then why would things change.
It’s about speaking up and then taking action based on the response. You say no ones listening to what YOU want or need then you do have to ask YOURSELF why you stay.
Yesterday I told my boss she handled my recent bullying complaint very badly and in a very untimely manner and I’m considering resigning.
Her response oh well that’s up to you.
My response ok I’ll have a think about this conversation and make my decision over the weekend.
I can’t really afford to leave my job but I can’t stay there either but at least now I know where I stand and can take action with clarity.
With regard to your boss’ response, her lack of apology and obviously absent empathy would make me want to leave.
 
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becalm

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With regard to your boss’ response, her lack of apology and obviously absent empathy would make me want to leave.
Oh I hear what you’re saying well and truly and I’m already halfway out the door. I had an interview on Thursday and was told if my references check out the job’s mine and I’ve another interview on Monday.
I could just walk away and say nothing but I felt I would be doing myself an injustice and had nothing to lose by speaking up.
I don’t specifically need a reference from her directly as I know others I work with would be happy to provide that for me.

Footnote: I resonate so much with usilser and understand completely.
12 months ago there's no way I felt I could have done this because I lived in fear of the consequences but I learned whatever decision you make or action you take there's ALWAYS consequences. Just got to work out which what is best for YOU.
 
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Freedda

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Imagine if you were talking to someone describing your problem, and they mirrored the situation to you with a hearty, "well, that really sucks." ... The ball is placed back in your court to decide what you want to do.
My general sense is a bit different here - that the Yi gives us advice on how to address our situation, or at least - by way of example - to say, 'if you do this, it will not be very helpful.' It's more like: 'the ball is in your court, and here's some advice on what to do.'

I should make it clear that my take is not that that this is not a difficult situation, but that I see the Yi's advice is to turn inward - perhaps to hide one's light, which may be to hunker down until danger passes, or it could be more meditative, or contemplative - especially since Usilser said she doesn't see many options out in 'the world.'

But generally I don't think the Yi's response is just, 'yeah, I agree, that really sucks' - unless perhaps one has blinders on and really doesn't see how bad their situation / lover / boss really is.

Best, d.
 
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moss elk

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But generally I don't think the Yi's response is, 'yeah, I agree, that really sucks'

Did you ever get 47 unchanging?
The message is this really sucks, link yourself to the high purpose in order to get through it.
 

foxx777

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Oh I hear what you’re saying well and truly and I’m already halfway out the door. I had an interview on Thursday and was told if my references check out the job’s mine and I’ve another interview on Monday.
I could just walk away and say nothing but I felt I would be doing myself an injustice and had nothing to lose by speaking up.
I don’t specifically need a reference from her directly as I know others I work with would be happy to provide that for me.

Footnote: I resonate so much with usilser and understand completely.
12 months ago there's no way I felt I could have done this because I lived in fear of the consequences but I learned whatever decision you make or action you take there's ALWAYS consequences. Just got to work out which what is best for YOU.
That’s good to hear, and yes, absolutely true.
 
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Freedda

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Did you ever get 47 unchanging? .... The message is this really sucks, link yourself to the high purpose in order to get through it.
Thanks. I'm not sure I've ever gotten that, but what you're saying here is along the lines of what I was describing: the Yi tells us about the situation AND gives advice for how best to deal with it - as in 'link yourself to a higher purpose.' I found the same thing to be true in this reading.
 
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Freedda

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What advice do you see in the reading, pray tell?
Hello Moss Elk. As I said in my original response, above:

The other level of meaning is more personal, as Cyrille Javary's name implies, to be 'Enshrouding Oneself'. It is about turning inward, either for protection or as a strategic choice - as an artist might chose to not show her work until she's ready to show it - e.g. we 'hide our light' for lots of different reasons.

And as you feel (perhaps rightly so) that outward options are closed to you, maybe it means to look inward, which some might call a meditative, or even a therapeutic, or spiritual, or healing, or curative approach. (One image I have of this is taking shelter within Gaia, within the Earth - which might also be a dark place, but not one that is unaccepting or unsupportive.)​

D.
 

moss elk

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ok, so you looked at the meaning of 36.
(not 36.6)

I would be surprised if anyone here can say 36.6 is an advice.
 

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