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1.5 to 14

jadefalls

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What is it about me that always makes me come in second in the mind of a love interest? and Yi's answer, 1.5 to 14

I've been reading posts about 1.5 to 14, and I'm not seeing the answer, because the posts seem to be specific in the subject, where as I am talking about all of my past romantic relationships where they never got off the ground so to speak.
This hex seems to be positive, so I am wondering how this is supposed to help me understand what it is I am doing, that puts me in the position to become second.
There is one post by the banned willowfox, that may shed some light on my condition.

http://www.onlineclarity.co.uk/friends/showpost.php?p=96977&postcount=4

Hex 1 has very fiery, passionate feelings towards a person but passion can easily turn to anger.

I see this as true, but usually I am only like this if I feel I am being rejected. I don't end relationships well. I don't know how to change that, and I am not sure that I should because If I am still attached to the person, I can't watch them be with someone else without it breaking my heart over and over again.

On thinking about this, I don't go into a relationship unless I want to be in it. I don't give myself lightly to anyone, so if they decide to change their mind, it feels like I am being used, and rejected and it's painful. I have only been in 4 long term relationships, where we were cohabiting. 2 times there was a marriage. The first one, Billy, we were young and his parents made him get an annulment. He did not want to break up with me. He still wanted to see me even after we went before a judge. He asked when we were leaving.."Do you want to go to the beach?" I loved him, but I felt that he had stabbed me in the back, and rejected me, I could not stay with him. He was the closest to being my best friend of all of them. Is it wrong to consider your partner as your best friend? Am I really supposed to treat my mate like a God because I am female? Is this my problem? Trying to be equal?

The second marriage, Steve, we had 2 kids. Hhe cheated on me, not once, not twice, but 3 times, and he wanted to stay with me. 2 times I tried to forgive him, but after the 3rd time, I said no more. While he was living with his soon to be second wife, he tried to come back, but I said no, I told him that we were not friends and that he should go talk to her and be her friend. He married her a few months later, but they divorced after 10 years, she left him for another man.

The other 2 relationships wanted to be with another woman, and I got the boot. My heart was broken. They both tried to do it in a friendly manner, but I got really pissed, and showed my ass, :rant:

9 at 5: Flying dragon in heaven. Harvest: seeing great people.
When the creative spirit becomes visible, it influences everyone who has a spark of it. One's own thoughts and behavior and everybody who is able to see. Associate with valuable people, who are able to give or receive value.
(Changes to hex.14)

here is a higher purpose behind your abilities, behind all gifts from Heaven. And there is a desire to respond to that higher purpose. Talents derive their value from the target they are used for.
If you use every talent you have as best you can, then you will attract the blessings from Heaven. Don’t expect Heaven to carry you though, its gifts come with the condition to use them and also use them free from egoism. The talents for living and loving are the really big ones. But small ones can also achieve a lot.



DA YOU. The upper character is a grown up man: big or great. The lower one is a hand: to have, to be, there is, to be rich, offer. Later a piece of meat was added (3), to emphasize possessing. According to others it is the moon, which resembles 'meat' very much, but the little diagonal lines are straight in the moon, and in meat they are not.
In former times YOU also meant a good harvest, and DA YOU 'best year' or 'best harvest'. According to Wieger the oldest meaning of 3 was eclipse or phase of the moon, but the oldest form of you (2) does not have the moon (or meat).
DÀ: great, big, tall, large, much, very, extremely, eldest, senior, an adult, to make large.
YOU3: To possess, to have, to exist, there is, to acquire, to get, again.

I really would like some help with this. I realize that I have gotten offended by some readings on this site, but mainly because of the advice given, without helping me understand the interpretation of the hex. If am here to learn about the i ching as well as myself. I promise to try to keep an open mind. :D
 

meng

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Maybe the Yi is suggesting that you aim higher, that you're worth more than you estimate.

edit: You know, I've done experiments with retail clients who had difficulty moving a certain product. It was a good product and the price was low. Hmm, I thought, maybe that's the problem. In advertising and marketing, it's often said that perception is ones reality. So we'd mark the price up, not too high, just enough to create a higher perceived value, and the items would begin to suddenly start moving.
 

meng

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After giving it some thought, if you'd like assistance in figuring how I derived that from your reading and circumstance, just ask.
 

jadefalls

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Thank you for responding meng, and yes, I really would like to know how you came up with that. I'm sure it has something to do with hex 14, and I supposed that if I took the advice of yi, I would get to that point, or at least that is what I am hoping. :)
 

meng

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Thank you for responding meng, and yes, I really would like to know how you came up with that. I'm sure it has something to do with hex 14, and I supposed that if I took the advice of yi, I would get to that point, or at least that is what I am hoping. :)

Yes, 14 is self evident in terms of true self worth.

See, you're on your way to getting the point!

H1 is symbolized by the heavenly dragon, or what we'd refer to on this material plain as lightning. Line 5, this powerful energy is not within the earth, lake, ocean or mountain. It is in the heavens where it is currently (no pun intended) and visibly active - the dragon makes his appearance in the heavens! See great people: increase yourself and the caliber of people you associate with.

Understand, these are each big images that contain many implications. We can only narrow these large interactive forces down to size through using the context of the question. From doing this, I applied your self-worth to raising your own power to improve upon all facets of your life, including those who have a way of determining your happiness and well being.
 

gene

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Hello Jadefalls

I would take a different tack on this than that you are not aiming high enough. I would say more that your “head is in the clouds” so to speak.

First off, you mention Billy and say you felt rejected, and yet it appears that he did not want to leave you. Why did you feel rejected? From what you have written, I would say that it appears more that you were rejected by his family than him. I suppose you could make the argument that he did not have to follow his parent’s wishes, but they can be pretty persuasive sometimes.

I really think things are happening to you the way they do because you perceive them to be that way. You never got over your rejection from Billy, and it colors and transforms your relationships in the present. Therefore you tend to get involved with people who will do what you expect them to do.

As much as I distrust western psychology, it might be a good idea to talk to someone you can trust and can help you overcome a certain type of negative programming. Confucius said about this line, “Things that accord in tone vibrate together…” In other words, your reality vibrates in accord with your thoughts. Your thoughts have “reached the heavens” and are bringing down your perceived reality.

There is no easy solution to this. You will have to reprogram your mind. That is what a good counselor or friend can do for you, or even a psychologist, if that psychologist has any spiritual understanding. I think this is the key here.

Gene
 

jadefalls

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Hi Gene,
Thanks for responding. Yes I felt rejected when Billy listened to his parents and annulled our marriage, because I had moved with him all the way across the Country as his wife, and all of a sudden, I was in this place abandoned by the man whom had promised to honor, love and protect me until Death do us part, and yes when we married my head was up there in the clouds and going to the Beach just did not seem appropriate to me after that. We were in our early 20's so it's not like we were fresh out of High School. I had to make a decision to stay there or move to where I had family support. I could not afford to stay there alone, so I had to leave New England and move to South Carolina, where my Brother lived. He never tried to make any contact with me.

I'm not sure about the getting involved with men who will do what I expect them to, but I do agree about the negative programming, and yes I believe it started then, because he was my first love, and that is why I posted about him. I just recently purchased a book by Michael J Losier, Law of Attraction, and I sent a copy to my sister as well, we are reading chapters and discussing it. It talks about Positive and Negative vibrations and he says that what we give out is what we receive more of. So maybe I am on the right track after all.
 

gene

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Hi Jade

I spent years in that negative mode without even realizing. I was playing victim and did not have the slightest knowledge I was doing so. The Law of Attraction is a fascinating thing. The movie "What the bleep do we know" goes into a scientific explanation of this. Also, the series of movies starting with "The Matrix" gives a lot of good information indirectly. And the movie Inception does as well. I still haven't overcome all my negative programming. After years of seeing things happen a certain way, it is difficult to expect a different outcome, but the more we let go....(see hexagrams thirty three and forty).

Gene
 

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