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24 Unchanging on relationship closure

aiyana

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Hi,

I'm in the throes of finishing a relationship of a year and a half. It's been exciting and different and has engaged me fully which is a great thing for me. I'm very upset by information that's recently come to light, and we separated a few days ago with plans to meet at the end of the month - he wants the relationship to continue, and I typically stay in touch with ex's. The rational part of me knows that going our separate ways is for the best however am caught in the emotional maelstrom.

I asked the Yi, how can I get completion/closure around this relationship, and received 24 unchanging. Just back off, meditate & chill out? With potential of relationship renewing?

The Hex speaks of cycles, but also regaining balance - the benefits of which are obvious. The advice of a return to normalcy brings up sadness as normalcy has included loving this man. I read in another post that it refers to the Winter Solstice which this year falls almost on an eclipse, which in certain camps signals momentous change, so perhaps I just hang out & see what the astrological fates have in store for me...

Thanks for any insight on this one.
 

tiziano

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In my opinion your question to the Yi is best answered in the Great Image: "The ancient kings closed the borders at winter solstice. Itinerant merchants did not travel, the prince did not tour the regions." The ancient Chinese didn't even exit their own home for three months during winter. So, just avoid seeing or having any relation to him for some time and stay with yourself. Allow the closure to naturally complete and your energy to start growing again.
And this is what the Judgement tells you: "Going out, coming in, without anxiety." People and situations enter and exit our lives, let's try to accept this without excessive agitation. "Partners come, not a mistake." Staying home also means being surrounded by a supporting community: this prevents us from sinking. "Turn around and return to your path. The seventh day comes, you return." Turn to yourself and let time do its work. "Fruitful to have a direction to go." Your closure has causes but also an aim, try to be conscious of what its aim is. Use this time to meditate and individuate your scope and direction.
 

elias

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24 is generally about returning to an established pattern in your life, and starting a new cycle. You mention having several ex's, so you are probably aware of the pattern of getting your own life back. The grieving process will happen in its time and there are no shortcuts.

Just curious -- in another post a few days ago icaste mentioned that 24 in reference to a man indicates many many lovers. Is this an issue in your relationship?
 

aiyana

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Elias, I looked at the post you're referring to stating that the 5 yin lines can refer to other girlfriends, also I can see how thunder below earth could be construed sexually. In this case, I'm his second serious relationship. To my knowledge there haven't been other lovers during our time together. Prior to me he was not a Lothario by repute (or disrepute:D). He does have stereotypically feminine qualities - sensitive and much more emotional than I.

Vederedentro, your interpretation is a validation of my plan to hole up upon returning home & focus on at last creating my own business. I am in the middle of a month's travels so I'll try not to take the Yi too literally on being at home on the Solstice; unless it's saying that had the trip not happened the issues resulting in the split wouldn't have occurred.

On 'What are the consequences to me if we continue the relationship received 7.1.4.5 changing to 58.' The lines in Hex 7 seem a bit tenuous (1), advising retreat (5) with a happy result. Can anyone comment on this?

On 'What are the consequences to me if we split received Hex 6 unchanging.

Taking into account the initial reading probably best to focus on my aims, keep some distance and see what happens.
 

elias

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This looks like the basic choice between a rock and a hard place. 7.5 rules the first reading, about continuing. A very tenuous situation requiring maturity and a very gentle touch to negotiate the issues. 58 can lead either to a rich symbiosis with another or a shallow relationship where you stay together out of convenience rather than attachment.

6 static indicates a very long span of internal conflict as you relentlessly replay the issues. "...a significant breach with the object of your inquiry. You may be facing a major disillusionment in your life as you begin to realize what you believed to be universal truth is only your subjective view of the situation. You will have to reconsider your premise more realistically. The need for an inner adjustment yielding a more harmonious outlook is indicated" (Wing).
 

aiyana

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Elias, your interpretations make sense in my personal situation. The 7.5 has been a continuous & sometimes frustrating factor in this relationship. He's much younger and anything he would construe as negative or threatening needed to be handled with care & considerable forethought, or else drama. :rolleyes:

Yesterday I finalized the break-up and set out for a road-trip. Have been absolutely exhausted to the point of skipping dinner to hang out in this crummy motel that a friend of my traveling companion owns. I asked the Yi 'why am I so tired' as it's been a beautiful and relaxing day overall. Result: 6.1.3 changing to Hex 1. I see this as struggling to move beyond the internal back & forth, with line 1 advising not trying to figure things out right now. Am not sure of the (3) 'For achieving one has to renew and prove one's value day after day.' Perhaps it's stating that the internal conflict will continue and needs to be honored and worked through ongoingly. Am hoping the associated energy of Hex 1 kicks in soon...:eek: I'm thinking the Hex 1 could also refer to the act of initiating the break-up. I recall somewhere on the forum reading that in 'situational' questions the secondary hexagram is often background information.
 
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elias

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oops-- I got behind on responding here; all this is probably old news...

I agree with your assessment of 6 -- trying to get past a situation, knowing in your heart what's right but still the ego continually jumping in with "solutions" or playing the same film clips over and over and over.
"We have true hearts, but they are blocked by the harmful action of moods, desires, and opinions. So we should criticize ourselves and be aware of that which is within -- this will lead to good results....

Now we are in the dangerous miserable cave of afflictions, yet the intelligence is brave and strong, enabling us to intend to criticize ourselves and change for the better...

It is enough to get the fault to disappear; do not stifle yourself with too much regret. (Chih-hsu Ou-i trans Cleary)

line 3: I agree with your assessment here also. It's not a time of great personal strength, but your past good actions, and reliance on friends, can get you through this difficult time.

So... going through a rather dark cave and ending up at Hex 1-- the Creative. Dynamic change, with all the complications that implies, but on to new and (hopefully!) better things.
 

patro

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I've got a a mart answer from Yi.

you know the situation.. isn't a news to you... the advice is to relax.. to take it easy!
if you want to exit from the situation the doors is at the begin of the situation...
I think yet and know.... it's time to change it. if you miss it... you'll begin a new cycles with your ex... a cycles that you can't stop before it will come again to the end.

Patro
 

aiyana

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patro, your comment resonates. I will be traveling home at the end of the week and he wants to spend xmas eve together. His pattern (like many people's) is to shift only when significant losses are imminent, and he is making declarations of change. If I do agree to try again a new cycle will begin, it's happened before. The inevitable conclusion will be ending up in the same place due to age difference and conflicting personal goals.

elias, thanks for your follow-up, I didn't expect it given your previous time on this thread and very much appreciate your insight. Obviously I'm in a Hex 6 milling 'round in my head phase or otherwise I wouldn't still be posting here!

Out of morbid curiosity regarding your question about whether the initial Hex 24 referred to other lovers, I did ask the Yi if he has been faithful and received 8.3.6 changing to 53. My personal interpretation is that he's been fantasizing about other women but it's not going anywhere. Here's how I got to it: Regarding Line 1, different translations unique implications: 'Associating with non-people' and another says 'standing by bad people'. Bad people could be unproductive thought patterns; non-people, well, taken literally that speaks for itself. Regarding Line 5, found a recent post by lisa: 'Wilhelm-Baynes says "The head is the beginning." This won't go right from the very start, or won't even get started, or shouldn't/can't get started'.
 

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