31.3 to 45 Does it mean what I think? Oh yes, another relationship question!

[backfive]

Hi you all.

I have been around here for a while, reading the posts and trying to learn some more about the I Ching with I got first contact many years ago. It's not what many people think, a divination tool, but a book of wisdown.

Well, I learned here I Ching doesn't go well with certain kind of questions, so I was reluctant to ask mine; but then that one was the question I really wanted to ask, all my energies and mind was in it so asking something different maybe woudn't have work....

I recently broke-up with my partner of 6 months, his idea and I asked to I Ching in plain words
Will he and I go back together? I got hexagram 31.3 to 45

It seems to me that is a yes, but I would like to hear what others think. My interpretation of the reading is obviously biased, cause that is what I want. So please guys, help me out here.

Thanks in advance

 

[Trojina]

i think it suggests theres an unhealthy element of dependence/addiction in the relationship and so it goes beyond your yes/no question and suggests its not a particularly good idea for you to get back together as you lose yourself, your independence in this relationship...nevertheless you may be tempted to fall back into it but thats your choice

 

[backfive]

Hi Trojan, thanks for the reply.
I am completely open to receive any advice and I appreciate it very much; being so, could you give me more light in that dependence/addiction you mentioned? Where in the context of the hexagrams you see it?
Thanks
Backfive

 

[rosada]

Trojan can tell you what she was seeing, but meanwhile I thought I'd give an interpretation.

31.3 is about running after someone, even if it is someone we know isn't all that good for us. 45 is about gathering together with others and the need to be vigilant as even amongst so called friends we can be taken advantage of.

Seems to me to be saying that yes, you could re-connect with this person but it may not be in your best interest to do so.

 

[willowfox]

Will he and I go back together? I got hexagram 31.3 to 45

The answer is that you may indeed get back together but unfortunately you are going to make a big mistake if you do go through with it.

 

[backfive]

Rosada and Willowfox, thanks for the insight.
If I am getting this right, there are chances of us go back together; but all seems to point that wouldn't be good for me at all.
Those mentions you do of "be taken advantage of" and "make a big mistake" definetely make me think I need to see the situation from a different perspective.
About the relationship itself, it was a good one; he is indeed a good man, but I can say I see he's too scared to be hurt. I have seen him strugling, like he's in front of two roads and honestly he doesn't know what way to go.
Thank you very much.

 

[willowfox]

It is a case of don't let your feelings overrule your good judgement.

 

[Trojina]

Hi Trojan, thanks for the reply.
I am completely open to receive any advice and I appreciate it very much; being so, could you give me more light in that dependence/addiction you mentioned? Where in the context of the hexagrams you see it?
Thanks
Backfive

'Where in the context of the hexagram' ? well its written in line 3..what book are you using ?

Wilhelm says for 31.3 "The influence shows itself in the thighs. Holds to that which follows it. To continue is humiliating" This is an image of the situation. The thighs i think can symbolise sexual urges or other impulses we aren't in control of, hence dependencies and addictions. If one is at the mercy of ones impulses one can endanger oneself, like when one is very attached to someone who isn't good for you. Just because you badly want something doesn't mean its always the best thing for you in the long run..like with any drug.. and romantic relations can be like this..you want it but it doesn't nourish you, like say wanting a cigarette.

In your case as you describe the man it sounds like the old story of you feeling sorry for him because he says he is confused about his direction with you ...and you are hanging around incase he gets less confused and decides he wants to be with you ? 31.3 says don't be a puppet on a string. If he wants you he'll let you know and he won't be confused. As long as you hang around waiting for him to make his mind up you aren't in control of your own life, your're living under his control...which is fine if thats what you want..but you are running after something that isn't actually that good for you anyway. Your feelings aren't a good guide for you at the moment, take back some self control..then decide what you want to do