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39.1.6 to 37 - Extended Family - is that the problem???

Lana73123

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I asked the Yi -- will Dude come over to my house again. I got 39.1.6 _Temporary Obstacles >> 37 _Extended Family

We had been dating casually (off and on for about a year) and he started talking to someone else about 3 weeks ago- but he couldn't break it off with me easily. Finally he broke down one night and said he needed time to figure out what he was going to do. I did not put up a fight but told him I cared for him and wanted to be with him if he so chose to be with me. That was a week ago and I haven't heard from him at all. (this is not uncommon, however, in our relationship - to not talk to each for several days or a week).

So my question - after thinking about 37 - Does this mean his family is the obstacle? Or does it mean that he will come back to me and we will have a more committed relationship? At first, I thought the later - that we would become closer and have a good balanced relationship. BUT - then I had a second thought that maybe his family was the obstacle. this, however, comes from a fear I have with our relationship because I am older than he is and he has said before that his only hesitation with me is precisely that regarding his family. He doesn't know how his family would accept me being 10 yrs older.

thought? Am I over thinking? Should I be asking a follow up question?
Appreciation in advance! http://www.onlineclarity.co.uk/friends/images/smilies/zen2.gif
Lorna
 
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mirian

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Hi lorna,

There are obstacles in the way of this relationship and lines 1 and 6 are suggesting that either he doesn't know how to deal with them or he doesn't think that it is possible at all. My impression is that at the moment he feels that making a move (towards the relationship) would only lead to more trouble. And if he is forced to chose between the relationship and the famiky he would retreat to the family. I cannot tell by this reading what the future holds.
 

Lana73123

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I just read an interpretation of Line 39.1 "going leads to obstruction, coming meets with praise" ...and "the difference between them is -- coming feelings like an invitation and going can be associated with fear, escape and sadness. "

Could this be interpreted as maybe, at the right moment, should I "invite" him over ...instead just waiting for him to come back on his accord?
 

Lana73123

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Mirian,
Thank you so much for your response. So your take is that 39 turning into 37 is related to him only - meaning that the changing lines to Extended Family are his family and have nothing to do with me at all?

I am new to IChing so sometimes it is hard to orient oneself with how to perceive the advice.
 

rosada

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I see Obstruction - Family as referring to your question as to whether he will come to YOUR house again. The I Ching is mirroring your sense that there is an obstruction to his coming to your "family". 39.6 Reads as of he is not intending to return but that if you were to call and invite him he would. Worth a shot...
 

Lana73123

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rosada,
thank you so much for your thoguhts!! and that is how I am leaning with 39.6 as well. that by the time the energy moves up to line 6 - the obstruction is almost gone and to reach out to him could be a victory for me.

the trick is...timing. Since we are not in communication and we have no common circles - it is like I am floating in space... literally. I guess I will just wait until the right time "hits me" in the gut.
Ugh - love - cant live with it and cant live without it!!
 

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