4.1>41 and Self Confidence

[yxeli]

I know that there a tonnes of archived threads on 4.1, but I would really appreciate a specific view for this particular query if you have the time.

I asked why I lacked confidence in a certain situation.

Im not sure if Yi is saying i'm a fool and i had to go through this situation to learn something, or if it means something else.

Ive been so heartbroken here. I think ive asked Yi thousands of questions over the past few days.

If anyone can help me I would really appreciate it.

Yx

 

[answeredquestions]

4.1 is a picture of someone not experienced, but it is not saying they do not have potential. Quite the opposite really. They have all the potiental in the world.

Yi says in 4.1:

It furthers one to apply discipline.

Perhaps the situation you inquired about is a situation you do not have a lot of practice in or know little about, thus creating the lack of self confidence. I think it is just saying that you can build confidence through knowledge/practice/discipline in that particular area of concern. Once you know more about something or work diligently at something, a natural confidence arises.

41 could be saying the way in which to start. That you need to put yourself out on the line more to get this experience and "practice".

Hilary on 4.1>41:

The ‘fetters’ are often self-imposed rules: ‘I’m not ready to try that yet,’ or ‘before I can do that I need to know all these things first.’

I hope this helps. I am new at helping other's with readings.

 

[yxeli]

Thank you so much for that. Yes, i didnt have a clue what i was doing. I fell in love for the first time. i couldnt react at all. i became completely stuck. when he was around i would freeze. even when he tried to interact with me, i would say everyhting that was the opposite of how i felt, i couldnt show him anything of myself.


Thank you so much for your great response! The members here are lucky to have you that was spot on!


Yxx

 

[Lavalamp]

So if it's your first experience, everything is new - and unknown. Hex 4.1, what kind of discipline? Maybe make a plan to know him and to let him know you better. Things to do together he might like, things to talk about. Maybe about his family, what his interests are, what he feels about current events. And know yourself, what do you have to say, how do you feel about things? Allow some flexibility for him to bring up what he wants to talk about or do too, don't make it "20 Questions" - a "drill" like the iChing says.
41, then you will "increase" in your relationship, know each other better, have some good experiences, a happy thing no matter how far the relationship takes you. It's not a committed relationship, so don't put heavy expectations on him, you're really just getting to know each other, and yourselves better.