40 unchanging, enduring relationship?

[dboy89]

Hi everyone,

I am new to this forum, but have been reading this website for a few months as I've been beginning to explore the I Ching.
Recently I had a very strange feeling about a girl that I had thought was totally out of my life. I was never in a relationship with her, but always had feelings for her and have experienced so many synchronicities regarding her. I had tried to communicate with her after she moved away, and our relationship got very sour. A few months ago I decided it would be much better for me to forget about her and completely ceased contact with her and erased her from my phone. I haven't talked to her in several months, but a few days ago, I just started having the strong feelings about her again that were totally coming from my heart, not my mind, I could easily make the distinction. Something seemed different, so started asking the I Ching several questions about her and have been getting what seem to be pretty positive reading about reconnecting with her. I've grown a lot as a person in the past few months and wonder if she has grown.
The one question that I need some help with is "Would a romantic relationship with her be enduring?" and received hex 40 unchanging, deliverance. Can anyone help me with some insight into this hex?

Thank you so much.
D.

 

[Lavalamp]

Well what romantic relationship? You're asking a hypothetical question about something that doesn't exist.

40 means how complicated things were is finally changing, there is forgiveness and tensions are relaxed and things are just getting back to normal.

I think this is talking about how things are right now. She might not want to stir up the tensions of the past again, might not appreciate that at all is I think implicit in the reading. But ask again with a better question.

 

[chingching]

I think 40 can also be as simple as , surrender... let go. Coming from a different angle I see the answer answering you regardless of what exact words you used in your question. The image of 40 is about forgiveness and rising above pettiness, in hilary's book she has great questions that one might ask oneself when receiving a certain hexagram and at 40 she writes:

If nothing could bind you where would you go?
Do you 'have to'? Who says?
Which path leads to where you want to be?

Pocossin views hexagrams as an image, a picture, I don't know what he associates with 40 but its a good technique to give a go, I see a tangled slinky, and everyone knows you have to finesse those out of a bind.

 

[answeredquestions]

"Would a romantic relationship with her be enduring?" and received hex 40 unchanging, deliverance. Can anyone help me with some insight into this hex?

I think Ching Ching is right, that it will answer to your intentions regarding the question. I don't think you have to ask again, but it wouldn't hurt if you yourself are confused about what your intentions really are.

People on this site can not only give you good insight into your answers, but they can also give you wonderful information about the nature of asking questions. It is so important to have the question clear, so that the answer can also be as clear and as helpful as possible. And sometimes that is harder to do than we think!

I often phrase my questions like, "Please advice me on ___". or Please tell me something in regards to ___". Don't be discouraged either.

I found myself in a similar situation, not too long ago on this site: 40 unchanging about if I should go on a date
http://www.onlineclarity.co.uk/friends/showthread.php?t=14209

 

[lilita]

About how we phrase our questions... I believe that since Yi is communicating with us from the spirit world, it knows our intention, our secret question, the one that we sometimes can't form ourselves. And that's the question it answers. Like in Hex 8 when it asks the querant to go back and ask WHY they asked the question they did. Where was that coming from? Maybe looking at the answer can better help us understand not only what we asked about, but also what our true question really is.

For me, Deliverance (H 40) is about release, or relief from tension - stress, worry, painful situations.You will be, or are, delivered from the knot you are, or were, in. That suggests to me several possibilities in this situation. One, that all is well, and that will soon be understood by all concerned. Two, that Dboy may find some satisfaction in whatever action he's considering, releasing HIS stress. Perhaps desire fulfilled. Or maybe even that it doesn't really mean so much to him as he thinks it does, so no need for tension in the first place!

But I do not see anything in this hexagram unchanging that speaks to "enduring". However, some of the lines could be read that way, but he didn't get any lines. I think Yi is just telling him not to stress over it, because everything is okay. What okay means to him, I couldn't say. But I'm sure somewhere in his heart he knows.