48.2.5.6 >52

[anyah]

I did an iChing reading regarding a relationship with a guy. I don't know if I'll get a response to this, but I didn't find another 48.2.5.6 >52 when searching the shared reading forum. So this might help more people than just me.

I recently moved to the other side of the world for a job. The job is great and I can't be happier. But unbeknownst to me is that a significant part of my happiness was because of my co-worker. He was always volunteering to help me, take me around, do travel errands with me. And I hella enjoy his company. I kind of thought that any guy who would pay this much attention to me must be attracted, but I was refusing to take it that seriously because he's 10 years younger and good looking and it seemed rude to think he could be attracted to me. But he was always in my cubicle or I was in his and I'd go home at the end of the day feeling overwhelmed (beyond my comfort zone) with love and affection. Personally, I'm no good at this kind of thing. I get scared, I get confused and I will ruin it every time. Apparently I'm very charming with guys that I'm not attracted to, but are attracted to me. I have several close male friends who started off that way. But if I like I guy I WILL make him run away from me kicking and screaming. Anyway, I think, after 4 months I kind of fell for him even though I was trying not to. And sure enough, he's started running. The thing I'm guilty of (I think) is being a bit cold towards him because of my confusion and fears. Now he's increasingly cold towards me and I can feel him pulling away. I tried compensating for that by maybe initiating too many conversations with him this past week. He's warm, he's nice, but he stopped keeping his promises to hang out even though he still makes them. He's stopped initiating any more conversations with me. I'm at the point where I just want to give up and shut him out completely to avoid being any more hurt. Obviously this is hopeless.

I asked iChing what I should expect so that I can mentally prepare for the way things are going. I'm so wound up I can't just shift between open and closed to follow his lead for whatever he wants. Should I keep my heart open and patiently wait for him to come around or should I shut it down and save myself the pain?

The reading I got was 48.2.5.6 to 52.

I thought 52 is kind of interesting. the one thing I noticed is that when you are carrying someone else's heart around, you have to be absolutely consistent, maybe "still" otherwise you risk hurting it. We are so vulnerable when we put ourselves out there. I know I was way too agitated to take care of it properly. I'm not sure if this is advice to try and do better or if it's telling me that we will stay distanced. I kind of think the former, but I'm too hurt to be able to stay open towards him.

48 the well 2 > the well is ignored, meaning that there's something there, but it's being cast aside and ignored. This is pretty much true.

5. Now the well is being consumed, this is in direct conflict with 2 and doesn't make any sense. But I'm glad that the well is found again.

6. seems to say that not only will the well be drunk, it will be harmonious and satisfying. That sounds nice, is this advice? I have no idea how to get to a place like this line at the well right now.


I tried a second casting. I know that you are only supposed to do one, so feel free to ignore this one. I only did it to experiment with a casting method but decided it counts anyway. It's the same question. Do I need to close myself off or have faith that we can still connect? 6.1.4 > 61

I'm guessing that this one is telling me to back away from our conflict and focus on me "inner peace". I'm reluctant to shut him out because I'm afraid that I can never go back on it. Once gone, gone for good. But that seems to be what the advice is saying?

Can anyone confirm this for me.

Best,
Ann

 

[anyah]

I'm sure that people are probably tired of answer these kinds of readings. I hope you can forgive me for asking. I did it because my feelings are so biased and everyone here has such an interesting depth of iChing. After sleeping on it and morning meditation I think I understand anyway. I need to stop being emotionally involved. It's hard because we've been such good friends for the past 4 months and I started thinking of him as more like family than a friend. But I need to stop and focus on my own center. Whatever the problem is, I can't fix it. I don't think it's my fault or problem anymore. He has to figure it out and I need to not let myself get carried away by it (61 and 52). There's no hope of me winning if I let myself get tangled up in it 6.1 and 6.4. But isn't that the meaning of life, to figure out how to keep one's own peace in the middle of these storms. Life is testing me yet again. I was looking for an answer to the future and if things will ever go back to how they were. I Ching didn't give me that, just advice to stay calm and that things aren't changing anytime soon so I may have to fight hard to stay calm.

 

[diamanda]

Hi Anyah,


I asked iChing what I should expect so that I can mentally prepare for the way things are going. I'm so wound up I can't just shift between open and closed to follow his lead for whatever he wants. Should I keep my heart open and patiently wait for him to come around or should I shut it down and save myself the pain?
48.2.5.6 > 52

48.2 - the well has problems. This most probably shows the current situation.
48.5 - there is still clear water in there, i.e. there's still potential and 'life' in the situation.
48.6 - this line clearly says 'open', an open well.
And 52 shows stability. The well is a stable structure, and 52 is also stable.

I've had this combination once, when I had asked about if a benign cyst would go away soon.
It didn't go away any time soon (but eventually it did).

In relationship questions, 48 is very often about someone that a person keeps 'on the bench', so to speak, for whenever they need them. 48.6 can show sexual availability. Overall, he either has someone stable and he plans to remain with that person for some time to come. Or he wants to place you in such a position. So this is what you can expect from him, if you are open to this type of situation. Since you speak about love and pain, I don't think this is something you'd like, it doesn't sound like he wants a proper relationship with you.

 

[anyah]

Thank you. My intention is to friend zone him. So, hopefully that will work for us.

 

[anyah]

Actually, your response helps a great deal! I just wanted you to know I'm thankful, also, because I think you may be accurately interpreting this. I do know that he has someone, and honestly I'd rather be friends. I don't know how it got so intense, but it did.

 

[Topher]

form what I get from my own intepretation(I didnt read the OP) the situation might have some issues but there is potential on it, there is a need to be clear with ones emotions, and open to the other because the problem caused one to standstill(to not move)

Ok just read the OP and why people dont open up to their emotions, everyone thinks that human relations are implicit in context? this isnt logic based to expect someone to react the way one desires if one doesnt open up completely. if you avoided him you were letting him know you wanted to distance from him and if certainly his mindset wasnt the one about chasing but expecting by their own ego that the people value him as much as he did then dont expect him to return to his normal behavior