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49 changing to 31: The boyfriend or the stranger

Ratatat

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I broke up with my boyfriend of many years less than 1 month ago. Although i am still pretty young, I did think most of the time that i would be with him forever. Anyway it came down to our ideas in life and what we want to do, where we want to live ect.
Immediately after i felt a relief and met quite a few guys. One of them i really fancied alot, we went out and i was determined to make sure i was in charge as he seemed like he could be a bit of a repeat of some of the boys I was with when i was younger.
I might have been abit too sassy because we never really managed to meet up again as i was busy ect and he lost interest..
For the last 7 days this has obsessed my mind, i feel like i am a child again and i have made the same mistakes i always make..
I asked could me and this boy have had fun together if i had behaved different and i got the 49 to 31...

What do you think, i need to get my head straight..

Shouldn't i be more worried about my boyfriend and are the two inter-related?
 
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Hi, The way you phrased the question is about the past. How would you phrase it for the future? I sense that your phrasing may confuse your intentions for the question and the clarity of your answer.
How I see this:
49.1 - bound by yellow oxhide
yellow is an auspicious sign, that the change you are instituting is well-thought out. That might be a reform in your character (being less sassy or in charge) or it might be the reform with your boyfriend (in breaking up with him). It is because you put this reform into place that you can preserve 31, your mutual attraction -- in your romantic life.
So, it may be giving you the go-ahead, and a thumbs up, that it's good for you to be reforming your character in order to attract love in your life.
You are still at the beginning stages of this character reform. Keep at it. Be solid and committed to it. Bind it with yellow, the color of moderation along with firmness.
 

thisismybody

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I second loverofknowledge's post. My first thought was, girl, get rid of the attitude. You may think you're protecting yourself, but your lead foot is fear and in no way is it going to lead you to your life partner. Or if so, he might scurry away, afraid you might swallow him. Don't be 44. She has her place. She's best when helping you get to know all her strength and power. But, another kind of woman is needed to maintain the intimacy and depth for love to bloom. Take 49 as a directive to 31. You're at the beginning. Yi says, yep, you're obsessive because it's time to make a change. But it's not 18. It's not spoilt. Just change you're approach. Or your ideas.
 

rosada

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Could you and the boy have had fun together if you had behaved differently?

49 . Transformation is about being yourself. 49.1 is about being cautious. 31 is about being open to another.
So yeah, if you'd been a bit more careful before hitting him with the full force of your personality you'd probably have been able to get to know each other better.

But don't beat yourself up about it. Be 49.1 gentle with yourself. Recognizing you've got this pattern is the first step to Transformation.
 

Ratatat

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Thank you all for your responses! what you have all said has made everything much clearer for me! I am feeling much better and I think I know what I need to do now :)

Thank you all for your thoughts!!!
 

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