53.6 > 39 help for my father

[yeshe]

This is my first post. I've been a student of the Yi for a few years but still don't feel too confident in my interpretations. Clarity forum has been a great support in helping me learn. I would really appreciate your input in this question about my father. I see the answer in a certain way, but I'm so close to the situation. Does another interpretation make more sense?

My 94 year old father has been living alone since my mom died in 2008. He has no physical problems, takes no meds and has managed quite well up to now, very independent healthy guy, but his mental condition has deteriorated quite a bit the last couple of months. I live 1800 miles from him and have health problems that make long distance travel very difficult right now. My sister lives about 300 miles from him. His strong wish has been to stay in his home of 50 years. I want that for him too, if he can handle it. I'm not in a position to move in with him and take care of him, and neither is my sister. She is also not very helpful for him emotionally.

My health may be more stable in a few months, so I asked the Yi, What if we maintain the status quo with Dad for 4 more months? (Status quo is my sister and I keeping in regular phone contact and my sister visiting him when she can which is usually every 2 months. ) Then, in June or July, I may be able to travel there and participate directly.) What's behind my question is wondering if he's already at a crisis point and something needs to happen now, or if we can wait a bit longer.

The Yi answered with 53.6 > 39.

My first thought is the Yi might be saying that if we wait four more months, Dad will have transcended the situation by dying. His long journey in life reaches its final culmination as he transcends from earthly existence into the clouds, and what is left is the blessing of his essence gracing our hearts like the feathers falling from the sacred dance. As for 39, if I read it as the context of my question, there are a lot of obstacles in the way of my being able to travel to him and help him right now.

Thanks to any of you who can offer your insight.

 

[hopex]

I feel Yi is saying it is critical to be in touch with him daily. Maybe a letter one day a call the next.
keep sending your energy toward him to help hold fast til you can be with him - 39 is a turnaround of some sort

 

[yeshe]

Thanks for your perspective, hopex.

 

[iams girl]

From my experience with 39, I'd also look at the idea of more "helpers" the situation. Maybe for yourself, because the right people can help us navigate the most difficult challenges. Also, for your father, if you are able to make your concerns more well known to others in his community, you may be able to initiate a stronger support network to address his needs even before you get there.

 

[Lavalamp]

"What if we maintain the status quo with Dad for 4 more months?"

53.6
Your Father has led a full, noble life. His presence is light and grace to us. He is gradually ascending, and there will be nothing but great, good fortune - whatever happens now.

> 39.
Obstacles. He can't really take care of himself, and he needs "to see the Great man" - probably the Doctor. Doesn't sound too serious, but he'll need to "retreat."

Going offbook, you might see if you can set up a hospice care nurse to check in on him regularly, until you guys can get over there. His home may be hard to get around in, he may need help with his bills and taxes, stuff like that.

LL

 

[Trojina]

This is my first post. I've been a student of the Yi for a few years but still don't feel too confident in my interpretations. Clarity forum has been a great support in helping me learn. I would really appreciate your input in this question about my father. I see the answer in a certain way, but I'm so close to the situation. Does another interpretation make more sense?

My 94 year old father has been living alone since my mom died in 2008. He has no physical problems, takes no meds and has managed quite well up to now, very independent healthy guy, but his mental condition has deteriorated quite a bit the last couple of months. I live 1800 miles from him and have health problems that make long distance travel very difficult right now. My sister lives about 300 miles from him. His strong wish has been to stay in his home of 50 years. I want that for him too, if he can handle it. I'm not in a position to move in with him and take care of him, and neither is my sister. She is also not very helpful for him emotionally.

My health may be more stable in a few months, so I asked the Yi, What if we maintain the status quo with Dad for 4 more months? (Status quo is my sister and I keeping in regular phone contact and my sister visiting him when she can which is usually every 2 months. ) Then, in June or July, I may be able to travel there and participate directly.) What's behind my question is wondering if he's already at a crisis point and something needs to happen now, or if we can wait a bit longer.

The Yi answered with 53.6 > 39.

My first thought is the Yi might be saying that if we wait four more months, Dad will have transcended the situation by dying. His long journey in life reaches its final culmination as he transcends from earthly existence into the clouds, and what is left is the blessing of his essence gracing our hearts like the feathers falling from the sacred dance. As for 39, if I read it as the context of my question, there are a lot of obstacles in the way of my being able to travel to him and help him right now.

Thanks to any of you who can offer your insight.

I think thats a very perceptive reading and I have to say its the first thought that came to my mind also. Its a beautiful line for a dying. The 39 is less important here IMO as you have only 1 line moving. If I take it into account at all it is the backdrop of difficulties currently faced that he and you will transcend.

The reading could apply to you too.....its just saying one leaves the entire situation behind...and naturally that would appear to be his passing. I can't be sure of that though...if you see any other way to apply it

 

[yeshe]

thanks everyone for your comments which help expand my perspective. I'll revisit this thread in awhile to let you know how the Yi's answer manifested.

 

[simulacrum]

dEAR yeshe,
to me this would mean ,that I should pray for his well-being.
best wishes
Manoj

 

[yeshe]

Thanks to Trojan's reminder, I'm updating this thread--9 months have passed since my question. In May of this year, my dad had a meltdown and spent a couple of days in the hospital having tests. When the doctors were ready to discharge him with a clean bill of health, he announced that he couldn't go home. My sister drove from her home 300 miles away to get him and took him to live with her. In hindsight I understand the 6th line as describing his literal leave-taking of his old life, his home, routine, friends, etc. and also his mental transcendence, because he surrendered so willingly and completely to a new life. He doesn't appear to miss his house, his routine or his friends. He exhibits a detachment probably caused by his cognitive problems, but it makes this situation much easier for him. He really has moved beyond. That it was his choice surprised me. I always thought we'd have to wrest him away from the house when it came time that he really couldn't manage on his own. He has adjusted remarkably well to the new routine. I also see the 6th line in the cycle come to completion, as the father is being mothered by the daughter. I never thought of him as a wise person--he seemed like a very one foot in front of the other kind of man, taking life literally, proudly invulnerable. Now he has softened so much and even though he is distressed by his memory loss, we can talk about it. For the most part he seems happy and content. I've been very inspired by his example knowing when and how to let go--the grace and blessing of the feathers floating down to inspire a new dance.

 

[Trojina]

-9 months have passed since my question.

you posted the question in February 2012 so it's more than 9 months ago...it's 1 year and 9 months.

Time flies !

Thanks for update....so this didn't refer to his passing but to a new kind of life for him

 

[yeshe]

speaking of cognitive decline . . . where did that year go?!