9.5 Experiences?

[zelion]

Hi everybody , I was wondering what type of experiences other people had with this line...

In this forum a lot of the people agrees having this line when someone helped them out, but there are other situations where this line does not seem to fit...

I got this line today when asking about what could expect tomorrow about dating someone who alredy cancelled a date with me 2 days in a row..but at the same time looks like still wants to meet me... I was thinking is this worth? Since she seems to be dating another man right now...

Could it be that I need to be more trustworthy, or that I need to share her with another man for now????

What do you think? I'm just being negative and the Yi is telling me not to think bad about her?

Thanks!

 

[zelion]

mmm maybe I posted this in the wrong spot.. Hilary maybe you'll want to move this to Shared readings..?

Ops!

 

[bamboo]

well, since the thread is still here...and in the spirit of exploring divination we might say that 9.5 issue denotes sharing the wealth for the benefit of all parties.

sorrells say " dont be a user, nor permit yourself to be used. " So intentions are important, and as your intentions are noble, it may be appropriate to woo her, but more important to see if you can establish trust with her. Mutual trust seems to be the key..

But if she is cagey, and unsure, missing dates, and dating another man as well, it seems like her credibility is in question. She flirts withyou presumably, but her actions seem incongruous.

Perhaps you can decide if you think it is worth more effort, or that she possibly could be using you, ie, likes you, but is too undecided, fickle and playing the field.

if you are really interested, you could approach it as it is, accepting that she has other suitors, but still be willing to throw in your hat. Undeterred by the fact that you may be sharing her with other suitors, you present yoursef boldly with sincereness and loyalty to your aim. Your sincerity and loyalty to what you want may win her over. At a certain point, you need to be mindful of her intentions. does she want a mutualy beneficial relationship? Is she in or out? Is the trust mutual? Is she credible?

I guess only time and your willingness to try will see. YI may not be telling you what will come of dating her, but you are given the guidelines for what to look for, what to be wary of.

you are not being negative or thinking poorly of her, you are just looking at the track record so far, and the issue Yi brings to light is "is she trustworthy? Mutual trust is the basis of a good relationship. will she rise to the occasion?"

hope it helps.
my own experiences with 9.5 have been similar. the issue was money, and around the exchange of the money there was a lot of time spent on trust issues and working out the mutually beneficial exchange,.love is a tad more difficult, but the guidelines remain
good luck

 

[zelion]

Thanks Bamboo, I think you hit right on the spot!

Actually, we have been friends for many many years, but 2 years ago, we began a switching relationship going to and fro from being best friends to on/off lovers...

But we were stranded for 3 months,this summer, because , as you said, her actions really seemed incongrous regarding her relationship with me.. but we are in touch again now, but I didn't know if it was really worth to try to woo her again, because it looks like she likes to comes back to me after other relationships with other man fail... She wants a serious relationship, she is trustworthy when in love, me too, but she is looking for that worthy relationship with man that only want sex with her... I gave her more than that, but maybe too much, since she told me that she sees me more like a brother and best friend for her... oh no!

So before trying to date her I asked the Yi if I really should go for her:

I got 27.4 two days ago, and it looked like it was working, but after cancelling me 2 days in a row, I asked what type of meeting I was able to have with her, it was worth, since meeting each other involves lots of strong emotions for both of us... and right now, she seems pretty busy and having lots of fun right now.. (the 2 times, friday and saturday)

So now I realize that when I got 9.5 when thinking, indeed, about what level of trust I would find if meeting her, because even we talk for hours everyday over the phone, she's been extremely cagey lately with me regarding her weekend plans after being stranded from me..

So I thing 9.5 in a situation like this, points to the importance of regaining that trust with this person..

 

[zelion]

sorrells say " dont be a user, nor permit yourself to be used.

Another possible meaning of 9.5 could be a warning not to being used by another person..

This could be the other side of the coin for 9.5.. maybe is just, as Jesed usually says, a model of the reality.. but the Yi is not teeling who you are in the "drama" that this line represents....

 

[zelion]

Here's the update on my 9.5 experience...

I think the message for me was: Yes, you'll date her tomorrow but, as Bradford translation says ... "There is no enrichment alone..." What happened was really awful for me, some other friend called her while we were having a drink together, she was having fun with me, so she told him to meet him another day... but suddenly, the same guy called her again, and finally she told him to come on over...

After a while, I was with her and another man, talking very closely, like in secret in front of me.. I felt really humilliated...

Anyway I decided to stay until the bar closed so I could have a talk with her after the other guy leaves......

Once we were alone, she told me that she was sorry because his friend told her that he was just coming in for a few minutes while waiting for another people,but the guy stayed all night long!! that she was sorry if I felt like an outsider...

When I arrived home, I decide to call her.. I told her that she should understand that it was awful for me for being in that situation, I felt like I was almost invisible for them while in the bar...

Suddenly, while talking over the phone at about 5 am... Somebody rang on her door!!!!! She told me that it was the neighbors ring.. the walls were very thin... obviously she was completely drunk and thought that could make me think that nobody was ringing at her door... she said I have to let you go and hung up.. I called her again and she was like in a bar with more people... and told me call me tomorrow... and hung up...

I decided to go back to her apartment....and I saw her with a man and another copule coming in to her apartment!!, just in that moment I arrived, so she, instead og going to sleep, she went to some bar in her area, and came back with more people and invited them to her apartment... I felt like a complete idiot.


The divinatory lesson...

So, in a nutshell, today she was having several dates together... I think that this woman maybe have some issues...today I found that my best friend for years .. and lover for a while... is a wild powerfull 44 that can cope with lots of men at the same time, and at the same time pretend to be really shy, like a cat...

I feel like already dead...

 

[zelion]

Btw, the 27.4 I draw before, was pointing that I had possiblities of hunt her...of woo her into intimacy, like I did before, like another times I drew this oracle... maybe having sex again with her... becoming lovers for a night again... What I didn't know is that when this had happen, it was because she really need it and another "handsome" man not was around to satisfy her...

I feel like she has used me for a few years...

 

[zelion]

Update

From a divination point of view, The Yi, with 9.5 was giving me a picture of my future date with her... A date shared with 2 other "neighbors"...

 

[rosada]

Thanks for giving us the feedback, Zelion. How awful for you. I hope there is some comfort in knowing your experience has added to our store of knowledge - 26.
-rosada

 

[zelion]

Thanks Rosada...

Very odd, but anyway ,with what happened, I still was having that "soul mate " feeling about her, and feeling like she could change her ways, since in our last conversations with her before the famous date, she was acting like she was doing something bad in her life, altough she didn't gave me enough information about why, but she was feeling "guilty"....

Today I found out that she may be into drugs now, and that could be an explanation for her wayward behaviour... and, somehow, I was the one with whom she always felt like at home, although she was dancing between a crazy life, and having a normal one with somebody....

Today I called her to speak about what happened, I reprimanded her about her behaviour..

She became really angry with me, hang up.. called her again, and a man answered the phone!!!! And told me to explain him what was going on.. I told him NO, please hand the phone to her.. she told me NO, tell me what is going on.. So in the end I told him about our common lady friend having several dates at the same time, and I just needed to tell her some last words and saying goodbye.. then, this man handed the phone over to her, but she hang up and didn't talk with me...

After I while, she called me back really upset, really crazy, because of course, finally I burnt all the ships and I told his friend that I was upset with her because she was dating several man, she yelled at me some sweet words, why I told her friend! You are crazy bla bla bla ...and hung up..

Anyway...

Since I always believed that this person was my soul mate...and she always told me that she felt the same even when she was not regarding me exactly as her boyfriend... So I decided to ask the Yi about the role of this person in my life, but waiting for a negative response so I could forget about her!!!! But I got:

Hex. 14 unchanging

It was the last hexagram I was waiting to see...

I asked how could that be that we can be still together with all that is going on?

Hex 21 unchanging ... applying the penal code??

Well, its what I did with her

So I asked what do I need to do now regarding her?? (I was waiting for a negative response again)

Answer: Hex 41.3.5 to 9

41.3 I should look for another partner... Sure I need to...

41.5 She will come back to me????

Hex 9 Hope???????


Maybe sounds crazy, but I cannot stop loving this person, Its the same like when someone of your same family is doing lots of wrongs but you still love this person.. like it happens with child, parents, and so on...

Just wanted to share this with you, so maybe you could tell me if I went crazy and I'm not seeing the reality of the whole situation... But I think its a really tricky one...


Thanks

 

[44bob123]

Hi Zeleon, I was scanning the posts and read your traumatic experiences. I'm not sure I can be of much help but I'll try.

1. If you are consulting the Yijing, spend as much time as possible trying to get the question right. If you're very emotional it might have to be just "Help".
2. I think the Yijing helps us get at the answer we already know, but perhaps don't like for whatever reason.

I've copied some of your comments about the situation:

I was thinking is this worth? Since she seems to be dating another man right now...

I need to share her with another man for now?

because it looks like she likes to comes back to me after other relationships with other man fail... She wants a serious relationship, she is trustworthy when in love, me too, but she is looking for that worthy relationship with man that only want sex with her...

what level of trust I would find if meeting her, because even we talk for hours everyday over the phone, she's been extremely cagey lately

After a while, I was with her and another man, talking very closely, like in secret in front of me.. I felt really humilliated...

I think that this woman maybe have some issues...

I feel like she has used me for a few years...

From your comments, I think you already know the truth of the situation, even without consulting the Yijing. Perhaps the question you need to answer is what you would get out of continuing to see this girl ?

As I said, disregard my post if it seems off the mark.

Kind regards, Bob

 

[zelion]

Yes, you are completely right... and it helps.

Its true, even if she comes back to me, there's no point in meeting her while she acts like 44 on steroids ...

She definitively have lots of issues, while at the same time its true that she seems to try to fix herself, its also true that at this point, she will never make it by herself..

So I sent her an email, a really long email, where I dared (although in a humbly way) to depict some of her problems in her life and what she should do about it, I put it out everything straight and simple to her, indeed it took me hours to do this...

She is pretty inestable, and wanted her to really understand what I was telling her, for helping her, just for that, because she's having lots of fun at nights, but also lots of tears in the day.

Thanks

 

[44bob123]

Hi Zelion, I struggled to make sense of your hexagrams. When I'm in that position I often go to "the Tao I Ching" by Tom Leworthy. He only provides hexagram readings without the lines. I've copied some of the text that seems appropriate:

Hex 9: Work
The indications are that you can get too involved in matters, to the point that there is no room for anything else.
You have an over-active mind, sense of duty, or emotional involvement. Even though.....purpose or pleasure are important, you come first.

Hex 27: Duty
Your duty or responsibility is defined by others, which you may accept, exploit, or feel exploited by it.
Uncontrolled, selfish or unreasonable behaviour must always be tackled, even if it causes temporary distress. If you have to compromise, consider the nature and desire of what is asked for.

Hex 14: Fail
You have to cope with the disappointment of failure - personal or events - and come to terms with it.
Let go of disappointment, it is of no use to you now, even though it may have given you some comfort in the past.

Hex 41: Growth
Something beyond you present awareness needs you attention. There are creative, personal, spiritual or psychic avenues open to you. Seek out others of a like mind. This is a time of inner development.
Make plenty of room in your life for the unexpected, and "unexplainable".

I've shortened the readings dramatically and only included those bits which make sense to me. Please throw it away if it seems rubbish. His style is not to everyone's taste. I think the book can only be bought as an e-book from his web site.

All the best, Bob

 

[zelion]

Unchanging hexagrams 14 great possessions

To be honest I think that is a big mistake to use the interpretation of the unchanged hexagram if I had changing lines... moreover if I had a single changing line, then in that line only lies the heart of the interpretation... although obviously, the judgement, image and relationg hexagram along with the Fan Yao can help decoding the meaning of itself...

Neverthless, these unchanging interpretations sound interesting to me (If receiving only unchanged hexagrams) this e-book could be really handy, because I'm always weary of the supposed good fortune of some unchanging hexagrams, although I'm really surprised that 14 could be one of these cases...

I've heard that in some traditions (I think Jesed's knows a lot about it...) some unchanging hexagrams are really bad, especially if they are double trigrams.. including Hex.1 and Hex. 2 But I'm not sure if this is applicable to a regular, traditional text method reading... and moreover less applicable if you are not asking a yes/no question

Anyway this brings up a question I'm really curious about right now...

What means drawing 14 unchanging using the matemathical method? The good or bad fortune here depends on which day the casting was made?

Anybody had bad experiences or received 14 after something bad happen?


Thanks

 

[zelion]

For wrapping up this story, I really wanted to know if the email I sent to her really did something regarding a much needed revolution in her mind, I din't have any reply,(maybe its still reading...) so I admit I was wondering if the words I wrote to her had any impact on her deep need of changes in her psyque, so she would able to correct her 44 behaviour and find the right path on her life...

I didn't wrote that email in haste, I had no anger in my heart, actually I took one whole working day to do this carefully, meditating about every word

The Yi said Hex. 49.2.5 to 34

So I Think that even if I never hear again form her in my life, the words I sent to her did something for her...

Btw, before sending the email, for everyone as a reference, I asked if it was ok

The Yi said Hex.19.4 to 54

Best

 

[44bob123]

I hope things work out for you.

All the best, Bob