A wishful i-ching throw?

[tabitha]

Hi -

I've posted before regarding a work relationship which was positive and negative- Regardless, I left it. I consider it often, and have asked previously what do about it, and received, a reading I and others interpreted as: let it go.

I'm moving forward, and still thinking about this, and decided to ask again.
My question was: do I reach out to this person, let it go? What's best for me?
I received 11-46, which I feel is positive and suggests reaching out.

Has anyone else experienced this-I know, now might be a good time, but I'm confused.
Does anyone have insight? Thanks

 

[willowfox]

do I reach out to this person, let it go? What's best for me? received 11.1 -46

Line 11.1 is quite positive suggesting, yes, indeed, reach out to the person in question as it certainly seems to be the right thing to do.

 

[rosada]

You've asked three questions here but I think the I Ching is responding to your last one, "what is best for me?"
The I Ching suggests you are now in a position to "extend influence widely" and to "go out into life and accomplish something."

I interpret this as meaning you should not focus your attention on just one person. Reach out to many. Of course, your former co-worker could be one of the many you reach out to ;-)
Perhaps you would have a reason to send out a mass email, "Dear Friends, I am now working for such-and-such company. If we may be of any service to you, please contact me at this number"?

46. says now is the time to "heap up small things in order to achieve something high and great" so it sounds like you don't need to go too far out on a limb here.

 

[tabitha]

O.K. thanks ladies. Here's where I get confused. I asked before about letting this situation go and got 15-56. Willowfox- I appreciate your input which at the time was: forget this dreadful/job and person.
Now suddenly I throw, and it seems like the i ching is all positive. It makes me think sometimes that the i ching is reflecting what I want to hear.

 

[rosada]

I think the problem is not so much that the I Ching is reflecting what we want to hear, but rather that we only hear what we want to hear and therefore no matter what the I Ching says we still don't get it. Sometimes I can trick myself into seeing/accepting a new point of view by forcing myself to interpret an answer in several different ways. That is, you can ask yourself, "In what way does getting this hexagram mean Yes?" and build your case, and then ask, "In what way would it mean No?"

 

[tabitha]

Yes!

Rosada-

Building a case- That's the right way to put this -

I can see it within this question already- Maybe ask: is there a way to continue this relationship appropriately for me? Or do you have another suggestion?

 

[willowfox]

O.K. thanks ladies. Here's where I get confused. I asked before about letting this situation go and got 15-56. Willowfox- I appreciate your input which at the time was: forget this dreadful/job and person.
Now suddenly I throw, and it seems like the i ching is all positive. It makes me think sometimes that the i ching is reflecting what I want to hear.

When did you ask about this situation before because I cannot find it? Last year sometime? Can you tell me so I can look again at my answer. So, before jumping to conclusions about getting answers that you want to hear, we need to check what was said before.

Your question was, "should I reach out to him, let it go, what is best for me?" What was the answer that you were really hoping for?

 

[sophie]

I remember your draw, it was about a week or two ago. I've found it now, and what I answered.

I would not change the answer I gave then - which was to even out your feelings, both the feelings of resentment and the feeling you need to move towards him at all costs: that's because 15 counsels us to get things back on an even keel, inwardly and outwardly. 15.4 is about moving forward in that new attitude of modesty and balance; and 15.6 is about disciplining yourself to keep to the middle path, not blaming others and making sure your own thoughts and actions don't veer into any kind of excess.

I saw 56 as moving on from the episode - not let it poison your life. This can be achieved by applying the advice of 15. We often continue relationships with people though we have detached from an aspect of it - in this case, a negative aspect. I think that distinction is important.

Now for your new draw: 11 - 46.

The fact you drew 11 might reflect the inner harmony you have reached through applying yourself to Modesty (15), to cultivating moderation and tempering excess. As a result, you are now in a situation when you can envisage renewing your contact with this person. Master Huang in fact calls this hexagram Advance, his translation of Tai.

I would go with Rosada and say that the Yi is also telling you that you need to do this as part of a wider professional networking, though I would not be as impersonal about it as a mass mailing. In keeping with harmony and modesty, I would strike a balance between mass mailing and close personal contact - maybe send him a mass mailing, but add a personal note; or leave a phone message ahead of time. This line does suggest that a continued professional relationship with that person might now be possible and beneficial to you, approached in the right way.

It might also lead to the resolution of the initial problem: that is one way I would read "pulling out a reed, other roots come with it" (as per Master Huang).

Stephen Karcher sees this line as indicating weaving. I don't know any Chinese, so I can't comment, but it would also suggest using this particular reed (the professional relationship with this man) together with others like it to weave yourself a secure situation. In other words - don't count only on him, but make him a part of a professional network.

Interestingly, Javary and Faure translate 11.1 in a way that reminds me of the upper lines of 15 - "pull out the reeds whose roots are all tied together, each according to its kind". This would suggest that you need to disentagle yourself from your former employer and go with your own kind - but once that is done, you can envisage advancing in his direction, from a stronger, moderate and disentagled position.


46 is very hopeful - it shows you are now in a growing phase, whereby doing a lot of small actions towards your goal will bring you closer to it. In relation to that hexagram, I think Javary and Faure's translation of 11.1 is particularly useful, because it shows that when we do untangle roots, we grow more freely.


As for the Yi reflecting what we want - I also think we need to examine different facets of a hexagram: that's one reason why I like to compare translations: very often, a different translation will show a very different angle to the answer (though very rarely one that contradicts the other - rather, as above, the translations qualify each other).

 

[bamboo]

I dont think your original answer , 15 to 56, said anything about leaving this "dreadful" person, and it seems wf didnt say that either. It seems to have meant that there was no blame in leaving the job, it was just the balanced decision at the time.

Now, it sounds as if you are thinking more about the employer than the job...you wish to reconnect with him for some reason...and your answer seems to indicate that there is something to be gained from doing that. maybe you will uncover something you need to , finish up unfinished business, maybe you will find more peace of mind - make peace with him, since you left with an argument? There is something unresolved in you about the way the whole thing ended. It could be that you will discover that you are very glad you left, made the right decision, and then you will feel free to move on and flourish. or something like that.

BUt I dont think the two answers negate each other.

 

[enmedio de la tierra]

Ths is not just a "work relationship"; there is no work relationship anymore, isn't?.
This is another kind of relationship; is there any romantic ilusion here?

You are entangled. The question is: is realy this man one of your own kind? If he is, good fortune; but if he is not..how could you expect good fortune?

You need to take a higher point of view, ascend in your perspective.

 

[tabitha]

Hope I wasn't too unclear with my previous post.

I asked previously about leaving an old job- I felt things had ended badly personally, professionally.I asked the i ching how to let go and see the situation for what it was and got 15-56. This suggested and it felt right intuitively that I might just move on and be done with it.

A few weeks later, I somewhat hoped for a different answer, and got 11-46. I wondered if my own wishfulness for an answer that supported reaching out had somehow affected my answwer.

That's all - all the answers here have been helpful- thanks.