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Divination for a friend

my_key

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A friend of mine is in a quandry at the moment. I consulted the I Ching asking what was stopping my friend from taking a certain path. The reading was 2 unchanging. This seemed to be saying that he is not sure how to proceed and if he let go of teh past and went ahead non-judgmentally taht things would come out for the good.
This is the first time I have consulted teh I Ching for someone else and wasnt sure if I should tell them so I asked teh I Ching "What should I do about the divinations I did for X?" I recieved 23 changing lines 2 & 3 to 18.

One transforming line seems to be telling me to tell him (3)and the other says not to (2).

I'd appreciate some assistance on interpreting the way forward that the I Ching is indicating to me here.
 
P

peace

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Why doesn't your friend ask the question?

I don't believe you can ask for someone else. No matter how well you think you know them - there are things they don't know they know....so you don't either.

Rosalie
 
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rosada

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Hi My key,
You may have noticed I got 2 when asking about what was keeping my father from taking action. From that I got that 2 is about the importance of having a clear idea of what one is wanting to do before a clear path can manefest. 2 is The Receptive and is about how the Universe is Receptive to any intention we put out there, but this also reminds us that we do have to have an intention. So in answer to your question, "What is stopping my friend from taking a certain path?" I see 2 as saying nothing is stopping your friend, if he intended to take that path he could. I suspect he does not have a strong desire to do it, or does not realize that if he really wanted to do it he could. So I think your instinct that if he were to let go of the past and focus on the future his life would open up for him is essentially correct. The I Ching is encouraging him to focus more on what he does want.
The real question then is "What should I do about the divinations I did for X?" 23 Splitting Apart certainly is not encouraging for sharing them with your friend. My own experience with friends who have tried to give me advice they think I may not value on it's own - and have therefor have sited the stars or an I Ching referance to bolster their case - has been that I have felt somehow that information wasn't as trustworthy as it might have been had they simply expressed the ideas as their own. I mean, it's one thing if you tell your friend, "I think if you just focus on the future it will all work out." Your friend would most likely nod and agree this is good advice. But if you say, "The I Ching told me to tell you you 've gotta forget the past and look ahead," I suspect your friend will feel manipulated, especially if your friend is not as devoted to the I Ching as you are. You make it too easy for him to say, "Yeah? Well you and your I Ching go jump in a lake."
So anyway, I think 23.2.3 - 18 is telling you to Split Apart from your original divinations but stay close (23.3) - talk more to your friend and then you may find out the REAL reasons he's not taking the path that seems so worthy. Then with this new deeper understanding you can move on to 18, Working on What Has Been Spoiled, which may mean you throw out your original divination that you did on your own and together - if your friend is open to it - make a fresh consultation asking the I Ching the question your friend comes up with. He may get the same advice the I Ching gave you for him, but he maybe more open to it if he consults the I Ching himeself.

It also occurs to me that hexagram 2 is saying your friend is not following a certain path because it is not that clear to him yet what he should do. Again, an encouragement to talk things up with him a bit more.

Hope this helps. Your friend is lucky to have someone who cares as you do!
 

hilary

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Rosada, those are really interesting ideas on Hexagram 2, thank you.

Personally, I feel very moved when someone tells me they divined on my behalf. But I can see your point that for most people (read - for normal people!) it probably wouldn't work that way. The best way, more often than not, can be to share the insight you gleaned from the oracle, without saying where you got it from.

For Mike...

What's stopping him? 2, the open Field. Maybe nothing is stopping him at all? Perhaps the whole mental image you have of an obstacle on the path is a false picture. The noble one in hexagram 2 does have a sense of where he wants to get to, but he is open and willing to accept guidance on how to get there. And he will take the time to prepare, to gather allies, before he sets off on his own.

What to do with the reading? Strip away the corruption... Well... all I can go on is how I'd respond if this were my reading, about what to do with a divination I'd done for another person.

Nothing wrong with divining for other people, in my view, but you have to be able to take your own preconceptions, desires, issues, etc, etc, and put them very firmly out of play before you start interpreting. Preferably before you start phrasing the question, in fact. If you're personally involved, this is immensely hard to do, and this reading would suggest to me that you haven't succeeded.

I think you have reasons of your own for thinking about obstacles and about letting go of the past. (Hexagram 18) If you're to divine for your friend, you need to strip all this away (23). Accept that you don't know what's going on (line 2, pointing to hexagram 4), that it's all still to learn. Your secure, solid framework for thinking about the situation has to be taken away, carved up by new ways of thinking. Don't put away your loyalty - or your loyalty to truth, no matter what it is.

And then, when you are solid as a rock personally, not moved by your own reactions (line 3, pointing to hexagram 52), you can clear the ground without fault for a new and authentic understanding.

I hope this doesn't sound too harsh - at least, I hope it sounds just as fierce as 'Strip Away the Corruption!' (which is pretty fierce - but also a powerful opportunity) It doesn't mean you can't read for your friend, or that you can't learn, personally, from your friend's situation and the readings you do about him. (It's not at all unusual for a reading for someone else to have messages for you as well.) Just that this is hard, and requires knife-edge clarity from you.

One other suggestion - a question you can use either as well as divining for your friend, or instead:
"How can I best serve him now?"
 
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peace

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Hilary -

I think that's a great question:
"How can I best serve him now?"

That takes the question out of the specifics of the situation - which I don't believe we can ever know as well as the person who is in it (consciously or unconsciously)!

You are so right. What we think is an obstacle - may not be one.

I can just recall how many times a friend had problem with someone that sounded so awful.
The next day I was still thinking about it and these people were best of friends/lovers again.

Rosalie
 

my_key

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Rosada - Thanks for you interpretation of 2. It makes good sense.

Hilary - I think you have hit the nail on the head !!!. I do have a degree of involvement in the situation and perhaps some of the obstacles are coming from me. Being relatively new to teh I Ching I hadn't appreciated the importance of clearing up my thinking and the influence it could have on a reading for someone else. Your comments have made a muddy pond a lot clearer. I'd not worked through the Steps of Change before on the reading , but hex 4 and then 52 tell a good story for me. Have no fears, your words are not harsh - It all makes good sense. Clean up your act, serve your apprenticeship and then you'll be able to leap forward.

I'd agree with Rosalie the question you suggest is very powerful. So I went ahead and asked it.
"How can I best serve him now?" = 1.2 - 13. I think this says that I have to carry on working through my obstacles, believing in myself, and by doing this can have a big part to play in helping my friends situation. As a result we'll both achieve things to our mutual advantage.

But then I'm all a bit close to this one and as I still have my L plates up I may be barking up the wrong tree again here.

Many thanks to you all.

Mike
 

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