Experience With 21.6?

[arabella]

I've gotten a casting for Hexgram 21.6 becoming Hexgram 51. If you have experience in this, please feel free to fill in the multitude of "blanks" that come to mind when I look at this combination. Biting Through with a cangue on my head and getting hit by lightening? OOh, sounds like somewhere awful -- but am I just misreading?

This casting is in respect to the future of a rather up and down association that has aspects of friend, neighbour, business associate and erstwhile romantic interest. At the moment I don't know where it stands, what cylinders are still active -- or not -- and there have been a few problemtic developments for this person. Nothing to do with me, but in general.

I am the more active side of this duo as a matter of personality. This is a straight-ahead individual, one foot in front of the other. He gets things done by sheer persistence and I really respect that. However, most of the ideas we take up, whether business or personal, tend to be mine. His couple of attempts at being romantic unfortunately met with disaster because he was nervous, on edge -- perhaps because that isn't where we started knowing each other -- and some unusual things happened. Like he tried to pick me up for a concert two nights early, with a gorgeous floral bouquet in hand, and was so embarrassed. We tried it again a few months later and he was fielding a family crsis on his mobile phone the whole while. [The crisis was resolved beautifully anyway but dominated our evening. Shades of one of the couples in "Love Actually."]

I'm not sure we where stand now, except that we share a serious interest in music broadcasting and help each other with that. I like him and his support because he is steady and sensible. We are opposites in many ways. Does that cause a Hexagram 51 explosion some day? Is 21.6 how sick he is of listening to my ideas and theories on everything from child-rearing to opera? Or did I entirely miss the point?

 

[Trojina]

Heck noone answered yet ?

I wonder why ?

well because none of us ever cast it of course...


and well we can't tell you what the advice was because we had cangues on our ears and couldn't hear it at the time

I remember someone joking this is a line when, when we cast it, we decide is always about someone else not us

Because fundamentally Yi appears to be saying words to the effect of "look cloth ears ...you just don't get it do you...you aren't listening..and you can't hear"...so what is one to do about that ? It mostly just leaves you scratching your head wondering what it is you don't get and feeling vaguely insulted by a Chinese Oracle


21 is about getting to the truth of a matter that needs some determination in revealing. We are biting through to something, we have to work at it, it doesn't come easy. It is a time when we are using judgements, using intellect...legal processes.

Thats the work of 21 but by line 6 seems we just didn't manage to bite through and whatever it was we just didn't 'get it'.

I reckon it can come up sometimes as an indication the question asked is fundamentally a question you don't need to ask cos you already know the answer but kind of refuse to hear ?

And this can be good things or bad things. I think on reflection I've had it more for good things than bad things....

For example if you know something you want is true, know you are going to get it but keep asking and so on. In this way it shares some territory with hex 4 perhaps ?


So seems to me 21.6 could either be about failing to bite through enough, failing to get clarity...or already have gained clarity and resolution on the issue and still keep going on and behaving and acting as if you didn't already know !!

Perhaps it can refer to a denial of a reality deep down you do know is true....and these can be nice things as well as nasty...like not believing someone loves you for example ,not hearing, knowing deep down but not acknowledging ?


I can't think why Yi should say something so rude to you I mean you seem a pretty self aware person...so only you can say or search for in your own mind what truth you already know but refuse to hear



Or you can get by as many people do by claiming the line is about someone else not you...I think that was Hilarys joke

However Hilary says in her book with 21.6 one is just not taking in any more information, that this person cannot hear the truth it isn't just that they refuse to listen...but then I always wonder what use is it to tell you you cannot hear the truth ? How can that be helpful in anyway ?


Hmmm...perhaps others will have more practical examples ?

 

[arabella]

It is so hilarious that I cast this today and posted it. Because the very person called for a chat. And after two years of not being sure how connected we were -- or not -- I was focused on this because of the casting and I think I purposely turned the conversation and said something extremely pointed just to hear his response. And I did. And his response tells me flat out that we work well together, we are neighbours, and whatever else was there is there no more, because he embarrassed himself in various ways when he tried on the romantic thing -- and couldn't find a way back. I felt really bad for him in the weeks since, he's a basically good person, and I know he's had some tough times that make "dating" difficult -- maybe permanently difficult -- but I was waiting for him to heal and find himself again.

However, tonight when I read what I wrote about me being the one with the ideas and the more animated personality and etc, I realise the fact of the matter is that if i don't make the effort from here forward he probably won't -- except when he wants something, which if I'm honest is when I regularly hear from him because he views me as some kind of music expert, and someone he can rely upon as a resource. Now I suppose you can call that "friends" instead of "lovers." But when I look at it realistically, I think it's best from my point of view to call it "over." Thanks Trojan. It's not about somebody else -- it's about me. Cangue is off. My ears feel better already.

 

[pocossin]

The cangue's off, but I've been meditating on the question and was just about to post this:

What would take the cangue off this relationship?
21.6 > 51

"Shouldering a cangue so your ears disappear -- pitfall" suggests a problem in communication. The resulting hexagram mentions 'laughing words'. Perhaps the relationship would advance if you shared humor while attending to business (not dropping the ladle).

 

[jfas]

I remember someone joking this is a line when, when we cast it, we decide is always about someone else not us

Actually, growing up internalizing blame and judgment, any scary line like this I always immediately assumed it was about me. In fact, it was somewhat of a revelation, only recently, to realize that the Yi might sometimes be talking about someone else in the situation.

In retrospect, I think this created a lot of confusion and fear for me in the past (as well as possibly defensiveness). [/drift]

 

[rodaki]

thank you jfas for your post, I tend to think of 21.6 in a similar way . .
Finding fault is often like drifting along a one way street, missing to see that sometimes there is no blame, on anyone's part . .
Maybe we are so used to our straight causal logic that often what accords differently is hard to listen to . .

Anyway, as time goes by this line sometimes seems to me as one of the most tender in the book . . maybe it is the chuckling end of thunder, it feels more teasing than truly harsh

I think Tom is on to something here too with his comment ..

 

[chucklesthegirl]

I have found it to sometimes mean that the other person involved in the situation is just unwilling to listen to what it is that I have to say or that they are unwilling to acknowledge a communication breakdown.

Most of the time though it is yi telling me to hush and stop asking because the answers are already there. I just have to be quiet/receptive long enough to hear them.

 

[angeleyes]

Maybe we are so used to our straight causal logic that often what accords differently is hard to listen to . .

Anyway, as time goes by this line sometimes seems to me as one of the most tender in the book . . maybe it is the chuckling end of thunder, it feels more teasing than truly harsh

Interesting choice, rodaki, to use the word "tender" for such a seemingly "scary" line! I recently had a 21.6 experience. At first I was terrified. I thought there was a warning or something I should have listened to and didn't and now an unpleasant shock was about to strike me!

Well, it turned out it was not about a warning at all. It was more like I was refusing to really "listen" to the (positive) signs that were all around because of the noise of my own fears and anxieties. Looking back at it now that everything is a lot more clear, I think what I was really told was something like " You already know. The answer is all over the place. Just quiet your mind a little. Oh come on..was that really a surprize (51)??".

So I have to agree that my experience was indeed a tender and teasing one. That's not to say that I won't get scared the next time 21.6 comes my way..

I can't be sure about your reading arabella. Lines seem to have different meanings to different people. However, i have to ask just in case it makes any sense to you. Are you sure you really "listened" to that talk over the phone?

 

[arabella]

Interesting choice, rodaki, to use the word "tender" for such a seemingly "scary" line! I recently had a 21.6 experience. At first I was terrified. I thought there was a warning or something I should have listened to and didn't and now an unpleasant shock was about to strike me!

Well, it turned out it was not about a warning at all. It was more like I was refusing to really "listen" to the (positive) signs that were all around because of the noise of my own fears and anxieties. Looking back at it now that everything is a lot more clear, I think what I was really told was something like " You already know. The answer is all over the place. Just quiet your mind a little. Oh come on..was that really a surprize (51)??".

So I have to agree that my experience was indeed a tender and teasing one. That's not to say that I won't get scared the next time 21.6 comes my way..

I can't be sure about your reading arabella. Lines seem to have different meanings to different people. However, i have to ask just in case it makes any sense to you. Are you sure you really "listened" to that talk over the phone?

Exactly what Rodaki is saying here is what's kept me in a quandry the whole time. Is this a question of fear of progress in our communication? What is that block, that cangue, about? Because it's practically perceptible that something is in the way, and yet we've never put a name on it. We've made assumptions and we've managed to blur the lines of conversation with business-speak that here and there spills over into personal matters. We use each other as sounding boards for advice, yet never acknowledge why we like and trust each other in the first place.

I confuse myself with this all the time to a degree that I'm just tired of being confused. He's a great guy, whether we're communicating on business, our work on radio, our families, or anything else. But we never talk about the elephant in the room -- past disasters that leave us wondering whether we could sustain another relationship, whether we even want one and what it would all achieve.

We both have a tragic past in relation to marriage and major loss. But that's hardly the issue anybody mentions when anxieties are so high he arrives two nights early for a date. We're just talking about a nice evening out for pete's sake. However, that gives you some idea of the fear levels and what it took for him to go out at all.

Actually, if I'm totally honest, on the telephone yesterday I think I set him up by asking something in a way that he would answer as he does -- practically/sensibly -- and I could say it was a cold reply and write him off. The rest of the conversation was very caring and he listened to my concerns over one thing and another for half an hour. Can this kind of confused motivation in conversation be 21.6?

And, if it is, what on earth is Hexagram 51 as an outcome?

 

[Trojina]

That's not And, if it is, what on earth is Hexagram 51 as an outcome?

broken record time the relating hexagram is not an outcome..its the context...it is the thunder of hex 21...however you choose to interpret that

as you had just oneline moving that line is paramount in interpretation

unless of course you have decided the relating hexagram is the outcome....cos thats your choice.... i was assuming you'd inadvertently swallowed the line in the books about the relating being the outcome

 

[Trojina]

Actually, growing up internalizing blame and judgment, any scary line like this I always immediately assumed it was about me. In fact, it was somewhat of a revelation, only recently, to realize that the Yi might sometimes be talking about someone else in the situation.

In retrospect, I think this created a lot of confusion and fear for me in the past (as well as possibly defensiveness). [/drift]

yes I always tend to do that...I was joking about always thinking its someone else.

I actually find it pretty difficult to take any answer as about someone else...even if i do ask about someone else's POV which is rare...though I do try sometimes

 

[arabella]

broken record time the relating hexagram is not an outcome..its the context...it is the thunder of hex 21...however you choose to interpret that

as you had just oneline moving that line is paramount in interpretation

unless of course you have decided the relating hexagram is the outcome....cos thats your choice.... i was assuming you'd inadvertently swallowed the line in the books about the relating being the outcome

Not sure what you're quoting here Trojan. Seems to be part of what I said and part of what rodaki said?

 

[Trojina]

Not sure what you're quoting here Trojan. Seems to be part of what I said and part of what rodaki said?

just gone back and highlighted what I was quoting...all it was was where you asked "what on earth as hexagram 51 as an outcome ?"

I thought you said that... I was just saying the relating hex isn't the outcome....IMO

 

[arabella]

OH, ok. Well what is the significance of the hex 51 then? If i'm thinking from the point of view that 21.6 could be missed communication or confused communication rather than interpreting 21.6 as my not hearing a message that should have been clear?

 

[Trojina]

OH, ok. Well what is the significance of the hex 51 then? If i'm thinking from the point of view that 21.6 could be missed communication or confused communication rather than interpeting 21.6 as my not hearing a message that should have been clear?

Personally I don't think 51 is very significant in the reading since you had 1 line moving that is where the emphasis is... but it has to be of some significance I guess. If the relating hex is your position to the question, the context, what its about, then thats 51 stuff isn't it. Excitement and all the 51 type things

Pocossin mentions 51 in his post above, post 4, about laughter and not letting the ladle fall.

 

[arabella]

Personally I don't think 51 is very significant in the reading since you had 1 line moving that is where the emphasis is... but it has to be of some significance I guess. If the relating hex is your position to the question, the context, what its about, then thats 51 stuff isn't it. Excitement and all the 51 type things

Pocossin mentions 51 in his post above, post 4, about laughter and not letting the ladle fall.

I think I generally look at the changing hexagram "becoming" the hexagram it generates. Whether that's "outcome" in a pure sense, well probably not. But I've always though the moving lines create a new dimension that can include future developments, or the way in which the situation alters. Doesn't have to, but could. I don't know -- it somewhat depends on the circumstances.

In this case, I haven't seen any shock, surprise, or overt 51 element -- so I'm assuming that it appears somewhere as a result of what's going on, what's being miscommunicated, that I'm not understanding and responding to. When I saw hex 51 i was thinking: shock, explosion -- because I'm not getting past the blockage of 21.6 so it eventually erupts.

 

[Trojina]

Hey 51 can just be a frisson

not always a shock or explosion

its a buzz

and often crops up around having a bit of a thing for someone

thats all

perhaps the 21.6 occured against a background of a certain frisson between you or in him...or you..or both of you

 

[arabella]

Hey 51 can just be a frisson

not always a shock or explosion

its a buzz

and often crops up around having a bit of a thing for someone

thats all

perhaps the 21.6 occured against a background of a certain frisson between you or in him...or you..or both of you

Aaaaaah, interesting way to put it. I wonder how i clarify what the 21.6 is about then. I like everybody's ideas here about the possibilities and what that line means -- or at least I can see/feel some potential truth in all of them -- and they simply can't ALL be correct.

 

[angeleyes]

I like everybody's ideas here about the possibilities and what that line means -- or at least I can see/feel some potential truth in all of them -- and they simply can't ALL be correct.

Uhm..Really? I mean..why not? The i ching speaks through symbols. Words are symbols, images are symbols and symbols do have more than one meanings. Don't they? They refer to different levels at the same time.

In this case for example. You are talking about a blockage in communication. IMO what happens when two people fail to communicate effectively is that there is a need for something to be said but inner thoughts and feelings prevent them from doing so. Nevertheless, we do not have complete control over what is actually being communicated. On a subconscious level, we do communicate our truth to others and that goes both ways. Your subconscious always knows what the other person is talking about even if it is not being said in words. Not knowing that we know (or not trusting it) makes things complicated. Because then we simply react with words to the words we hear and most of the time words just don't make sense!!

So, between you and this man, there is indeed a blockage in communication. What lies beneath that is probably what you already described. Feelings of pain and loss and fear of reliving them. But words left aside, you are both communicating those feelings to eachother all this time, so maybe that's what you already know. 21.6 could be refering to the blockage, the inner feelings and the truth of your communication all at the same time. If that is the case then what better way to remove the blockage than good humor like pocossin suggested. If we look at it this way, maybe everybody is right afterall.. And if you ask me, I think there might be other sides too we haven't seen yet!

Lastly, a comment about 51. I already posted this in another thread about experiences with this hex. 51 in my readings is often followed by a phone call! If your reading was mine I would think that 51 was the actual call you received. Afterall, you did ask about the future and that's a pretty broad sense..

PS:I really hope i am making sense here!

 

[rodaki]

Interesting choice, rodaki, to use the word "tender" for such a seemingly "scary" line! I recently had a 21.6 experience. At first I was terrified. I thought there was a warning or something I should have listened to and didn't and now an unpleasant shock was about to strike me!

So I have to agree that my experience was indeed a tender and teasing one. That's not to say that I won't get scared the next time 21.6 comes my way..

I can't be sure about your reading arabella. Lines seem to have different meanings to different people. However, i have to ask just in case it makes any sense to you. Are you sure you really "listened" to that talk over the phone?

I like the way you've expressed your experience here and agree on being cautious over the scary parts . . Sometimes a warning is a warning is a warning! But I have found that when feelings are concerned readings often work by inversion, reversal, or paradox (must be something about the nature of the darn things!). I find that a delicate place to be cause in divination we are supposed to believe our first impressions -but then who can tell for sure that this wasn't part of some past conditioning?

Experiencing the positive side of such a dark line though for me shows a much longer journey than obvious in order to find how to be kind to ourselves -which is also the only way that we can honestly be kind to others too.
Unfortunately - . . or not? - seeing the light side of things does not come by flicking a switch for any of us, despite what may hastily be assumed by any passing bystander (see some judging from hearsay in 51.6, the line's fan yao). But anyways, to make a long story short, I'm glad you got to see the sunny side of this



hi Arabella,

21 made a lot of great sense for me ever since I saw it as both about getting rid of obstacles as much as about creating barriers . . for 21.6 I have this image of people wearing headphones or earplugs, things we use to cut away incoming stimuli because it had been detrimental in some way in the past but then forgetting to take them off . . What reaches our ears then is lingering past echoes or, as angeleyes and jfas said, the broken record of our own thoughts. 51 could be desire, or past trauma that gets too many of those inner bells ringing, or that buzzing thingy Trojan mentions . .

Seems to me you both have your share of emotional baggage and trauma and your own sets of stopping mechanisms which can turn into obstacles if you let them take over your voice too much . . besides, the trenches of our past are sadly more comfortable rather than making the space needed for being in the present . .

Returning to Pocossin's idea though, I think such blocks are often more eloquently bypassed by laughing them thru instead of thinking them out . .

 

[Trojina]

Aaaaaah, interesting way to put it. I wonder how i clarify what the 21.6 is about then. I like everybody's ideas here about the possibilities and what that line means -- or at least I can see/feel some potential truth in all of them -- and they simply can't ALL be correct.

There will be only one correct undertsanding of the line in relation to your question ...and of course it can only be yours as there is no objective meaning for all time of any line as you know..

People offer their ideas about what it may mean or has meant for them but they can't take you to the meaning for you. Thats your job I'm afraid

I haven't seen particulary conflicting ideas of 21.6 in this thread as it is in the end quite a simple line in that someone cannot hear either because they can't or won't.


I'd say more often than not there will be resistance on our part to figuring out what we resist hearing...otherwise we wouldn't be resisting hearing it ...if that makes sense.

I don't see it so much as a communication difficulty with others ...I think its an internal thing about ones own resistances, a communication difficulty within oneself. You stopping you hearing what you don't want to....

 

[arabella]

21 made a lot of great sense for me ever since I saw it as both about getting rid of obstacles as much as about creating barriers . . for 21.6 I have this image of people wearing headphones or earplugs, things we use to cut away incoming stimuli because it had been detrimental in some way in the past but then forgetting to take them off . . What reaches our ears then is lingering past echoes or, as angeleyes and jfas said, the broken record of our own thoughts. 51 could be desire, or past trauma that gets too many of those inner bells ringing, or that buzzing thingy Trojan mentions . .

Seems to me you both have your share of emotional baggage and trauma and your own sets of stopping mechanisms which can turn into obstacles if you let them take over your voice too much . . besides, the trenches of our past are sadly more comfortable rather than making the space needed for being in the present . .

Returning to Pocossin's idea though, I think such blocks are often more eloquently bypassed by laughing them thru instead of thinking them out .

This is a good summary of what is going on I think. I speak through trauma, as probably so does he -- although it's easier to see my own limitations than to see his. I realise reading all of this that I see him as far more "entitled" too and suspect that I am probably the "dummy" in the situation. That's all another dimension, I suppose, of someone must be "right" and the other person "wrong," of the blame that was mentioned. The idea of laughing it off rather than therapising it through is a good one, although I'm usually busy being quite serious and looking for "solutions" rather than just admitting the humanness of fear or pain and letting it dissipate. That's a short suit for me too: humour. And yet, making it serious only embeds that trauma and laughter would be a very good antidote, if I can lighten up a bit and stop worrying myself whether I'm looking limited or vulnerable. There's a lot goes into those cloth ears, that makes it hard to listen and believe, not only the flaws in communication, but the good aspects of how we get along -- and there are many.

 

[arabella]

Casting for Clarification

I cast again just now to ask about "the potential of this relationship" and received the reply: Hexagram 11.1 becoming Hexagram 46.

I thought that if the Yi says there isn't really potential in this relationship then maybe the message is to just quit banging my head on a brick wall -- there's nothing to understand. The potential sounds excellent if one is focuing on the ideal of "setting out to bring order." Is this about improving communication? Order to what? LiSe says this line is about blessings coming in bundles. Hmmmmm. So perhaps many good things are possible if I can "bring order"?

Maybe bringing order could relate more to relaxing and laughing and lightening up -- just being ourselves? I'd say that neither of us could have "too much" fun considering all we've survived in the past few years.

 

[arabella]

Not that I mind talking to myself -- I've spent the whole Winter doing it. I've made a more radical assessment of the 11.1 and decided that "bringing order" means declaring order in my own world. It makes sense to me that this is the case since it's the only aspect of "order" I really have any control over.

And with that in mind, I'm more or less back to where I began and my own rules of order which, in relationships with guys, say that if you have to guess then just let it go. Not that any work collaboration with this person is in question. If it works, it works. But beyond into the social realm -- my crystal ball has been stashed back in the cupboard and unless he comes knocking with a declaration of some distinct purpose, I'm outta here. Charades, or whatever we were playing, is over.

 

[arabella]

I came across something from LiSe, just coincidentally, about how to read moving lines versus relating hexes -- or resulting as some here call them. And as a matter of interest, this is what she said, which is exactly my experience as well in terms of giving weight one way or another and which is more primary to the reading:

When I get an answer, and I interpret it the way it 'should' be interpreted, then I can just as well forget about it. Only when my mind is free, I can hear what the Yi is saying. And sometimes the relating hexagram can be more important than the primary one. Sometimes I can skip the lines, sometimes the most important part of the answer is in the lines. Same with relating, and with primary hexagram. The relating hexagram can very well be the overall situation, the enduring part, and the primary the information what you can do about it in this moment, the temporary part.

So I don't think there are rules which are valid in all circumstances

And further she said this:

I do not disagree with what you said about the relating and primary hexagram. Not at all. But I do disagree with this being THE way to interpret them. It is one of the ways, and not a wrong way.. .

LiSe

This is my feeling on the relationship of these as well. It can go a lot of ways and that's all part of the joy and interest of interpretation I think.

 

[Trojina]

yes Lise is one of the sources of my understanding that the relating hexagram is the 'sea the primary swims in'...her phrase perhaps...don't know, but it envelops the primary

However often in I ching books the relating hex is limited to only being 'the outcome' which is a pity and misleading...unless you decide thats all you want it to be or all it is for you as some do

I only mentioned it because I thought perhaps you thought there was a rule that the relating hexagram was the outcome...when you said "what on earth is 51 as an outcome ?" like you were going to wrack your brain over looking for 51 as an outcome when there was no need IMO

But thats the trouble with "I thought you thought" maybe I'll stick just to 'I thought'

so yes i agree with what Lise said rather than the one linear idea the primary leads to the relating and the relating is the future...etc etc...but that is also a valid way to see it if it works for you.

I wasn't saying 'you must do it my way'...I just thought perhaps you weren't aware there were other ways than the linear way that seems to be put forward in many Yi books....but er you were and had chosen to see 51 as outcome which is perfectly valid of course.

 

[rodaki]

Not that I mind talking to myself -- I've spent the whole Winter doing it. I've made a more radical assessment of the 11.1 and decided that "bringing order" means declaring order in my own world. It makes sense to me that this is the case since it's the only aspect of "order" I really have any control over.

And with that in mind, I'm more or less back to where I began and my own rules of order which, in relationships with guys, say that if you have to guess then just let it go. Not that any work collaboration with this person is in question. If it works, it works. But beyond into the social realm -- my crystal ball has been stashed back in the cupboard and unless he comes knocking with a declaration of some distinct purpose, I'm outta here. Charades, or whatever we were playing, is over.

hello again, seemed I missed a couple of posts here . .

hmm, I'm not sure 11 is that much about bringing order or declaring or anything so structured . . There was this post I had come across for Rosada's thread (here's the link) which radically changed my idea of 11 and the kind of effort it takes . .
And while I know 46 speaks of sustained work, I tend to see this reading as one thing bringing forth its next in a natural, almost flowing manner -not because we have decided to make it so but because things follow their own energy levels avoiding as much as possible stagnating spots. I wonder whether you are being far too (self)determined for what your reading is saying

. . just a thought

 

[arabella]

hello again, seemed I missed a couple of posts here . .

hmm, I'm not sure 11 is that much about bringing order or declaring or anything so structured . . There was this post I had come across for Rosada's thread (here's the link) which radically changed my idea of 11 and the kind of effort it takes . .
And while I know 46 speaks of sustained work, I tend to see this reading as one thing bringing forth its next in a natural, almost flowing manner -not because we have decided to make it so but because things follow their own energy levels avoiding as much as possible stagnating spots. I wonder whether you are being far too (self)determined for what your reading is saying

. . just a thought

And a really good thought Rodaki. I had to walk away from it and think and come back. Because I nearly WANTED Hex 11 to close the case. And that was my first instinct with Trojan's initial reading of 21.6. OK CASE CLOSED. And what you have said made me stop and think why I am treating this in such a way. Why I can't wait and see what happens. And I just don't have a good answer after thinking about it all afternoon. It's like I see this switch in relation to this guy "ON or OFF."

I think I've been trying to read him and his emotional "body language" for a long time. My reading keeps changing and his behaviour keeps changing besides. So I think I cast for this in frustration wanting THE ANSWER. And, surprise, it's not that simple.

I've tended to see the barriers in the situation and not the Flow, not a Hex 11 at all. The experience of this relationship has made me impatient to have a yeah-or-nay bit of punctuation and an end point. So, truth hurts, I think I know why. Because I like to end things first. If there's no clear rationale behind the rapport [or, even worse, 21.6 pops up in a casting] I start to get nervous, get sure it's going to be over sooner or later [or that it might get really messy] and decide to make that ending sooner. In fact, right now.

So what do we call this? Fear of rejection maybe. Fear of something anyway. I want it decided NOW and preferably by me. Hmmmm. Not so good.

But what is good is the idea of Hex 11 and learning to go with it, whatever happens. Rather than giving a relationship a premature execution. Scarey maybe, but good.

Looking back through this thread I have to say it has some really good contributions. Not that discussions aren't often good on Clarity, but this has been so helpful and I've learned a lot in these two castings in one big gulp.

 

[precision grace]

I have just cast 21.6 and found this thread while looking for info on 21.6.

Interesting, isn't it - in retrospect. Assuming this is the same guy who may or may not have been proposing to another woman at this point in time? Was that the 51 we never understood?

And isn't it amazing how 11 tends to crop up for ridiculously dense relationship situations? answeredquestions got one for her very unpleasant stalker experience in memory serves.

And 46 too. There will be progress...of sorts... Ah. Retrospective. How pricey you are.

 

[arabella]

I have just cast 21.6 and found this thread while looking for info on 21.6.

Interesting, isn't it - in retrospect. Assuming this is the same guy who may or may not have been proposing to another woman at this point in time? Was that the 51 we never understood?

And isn't it amazing how 11 tends to crop up for ridiculously dense relationship situations? answeredquestions got one for her very unpleasant stalker experience in memory serves.

And 46 too. There will be progress...of sorts... Ah. Retrospective. How pricey you are.

Based now on experience, I think that hexagram 51 can be a person with deeply reverberating problems. Hexagram 11 has become a "cool off and go with the flow" for me where my expectations are just too high -- and the outcome is better if I don't push and let it ride.

Hexagram 46 unchanging was a recent one for me -- I was sending a message and was angry. I can see that it means my progress [venting] comes at the cost of riling somebody up and getting them going -- which means the situation goes on and on when I had hoped to shut it off.