Getting rid of a fear and anxiety. hexagram 60 2.3.4> 49

[zumi]

Hi everyone,
I asked I Ching today what do I need to to to get rid of an anxiety and fear. the Oracle replied with 60.2.3.4 going to 49. It's very confusing for me to interpret it. The second line says to act on something, but I don't know on what. It is related to the X, with whom we made up, but I think I don't entirely trust him, because he wants to be with me now after breaking up a month ago. The third line says that I have to blame myself for this fear? Maybe because I am taking things with him too seriously but I should not, so in the end I will blame myself? And the fourth line says that I have other things to do thus I limit my time with him and it's good for me?
Please help me.

 

[innertruth]

I might be wrong, but to me 49 shows your relationship going through changes (breaking up, distrust).

49.3 says that relying on self-control and openness in this situation will help (looks like the changes that happened to you were quite painful). In this condition - action should be weighted, no rush. "This depicts a situation in which one must find the proper balance between action and inaction. The line is an unambiguous warning about being clear in one's mind and cautious in one's transactions. Balanced differentiations (perhaps augmented by mature advice from others) are called for."

Lines 4 of both 60 and 49 are auspicious. They call for not restraining yourself for more that you can bear, and that only when you are entirely confident about what to do - the change will be complete and favorable.

So to me, 60 speaks of your own limitations applied by yourself in the way you look at things, some disorder in mind, something that you think you "must" do with him. (like you said he wants to be with you, you are distrustful - might be for a reason).

But 49 says that situation runs its course. And now, it is up to you to be in comfort with yourself (first of all) and decide calmly what is it you really want.

 

[zumi]

Thank you very much innertruth!

I do like him, but he is younger than me and is definitely not ready to be serious, he broke up with me out of confusion because of unfavorable conditions in his professional career, but then he realized he still wants to be with me. I told my friends about us, they are very sceptical they he will stay. That is when i started to be scared that i will be broken hearted again. My fear is that he does it out of convenience, because he decided to settle in the city for a bit more. I know that he is not ready to be serious, neither I am right now, but I would like to know that there is a potential.

I asked I Ching "What should I do to keep him"? It replied with 63.5 going into 36. So I should not display ant big ambitions to him, I actually started (but now I have to cover my intelligence, just like hexagram 36 says.

I am very aware of the next reading I did"what does he think of me? " I got 16.4.6 going into 23. Line 6 talks about changing its course with out a blame, that he is deluded in his perception of me??? And a 23 hexagram "disintegration" doesn't sound an optimistic as well.
I want to be with him, but I am very confused because of not being able to relay on him as a long term. True, we know each other for only 4 months, maybe I just want too much from him???