Good old Hex 44, unchanging

[bloke]

I have this terrible crush on a woman I work with. I'm married and I love my wife, but I haven't been able to get this woman out of my head for the last four years, so it's a really persistant, long running thing. There has certainly been some mutual attraction at times.

It does drive me mad sometimes. I don't believe that repressing our feelings is good for us, so I acknowledge the situation to myself, but sometimes I feel like a dog chasing my tail - there is never any resolution.

I have been asking the I-ching a few questions about this situation, to try and work out how to deal with it. One of the questions I asked was "Why can't I let go of my feelings for X?"

The answer I got was hexagram 44, with no changing lines.

This seems very appropriate to the situation, but I am not sure how to interpret this in relation to my question. 44 seems to refer to a potentially dangerous situation in some ways, but without the changing lines, it doesn't seem as dangerous. It seems to imply that this attraction is indeed quite powerful, but is it important?

I really want to try and get to the bottom of why I feel like this, so that I can somehow get a resolution.

What are your thoughts? Thankyou in advance for any advice you can offer.

 

[anemos]

Hi,

reading your, post the story of Odyssey and the Sirens, which I associate with hex 44 comes in mind. If you google it you may find some usefull thing to ponder on

there are many treads about 44 and many different opinions.

My impression is that Yi , by giving you 44 asks you what makes this woman so attractive to you and how far you really want to go, and which are the coincidence in your life ?

 

[elias]

Hilary's interpretation might be useful in a most literal sense:

The Oracle warns not to take this woman -- not to try to seize control of her, and not to marry her. Do not imagine that you can bring her under your control, assimilate her into your life and continue as before. Such a marriage cannot last.

The woman has more power than any system where you might try to contain her. She might bring desires that undermine a well-balanced life, or an irruption of feeling into a realm of abstractions, or chance and irrationality to threaten a logical, ordered mind....

Carol Anthony:

We should certainly not entertain any idea, or become involved in any situation which contains the element of seduction. Receiving this hexagram often indicates that we are entertaining ideas which are incorrect, seductive, or flattering.

The easy, seductive, or flattering thing is pictured as a 'bold girl who lightly surrenders herself and thus seizes power.' Whether it be a flattering person, situation, or idea, the fact that it comes boldly and easily should be warning enough to stand by our inner guidelines of what is correct and essential.