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Guidance on my relationship

purpledawn

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Hello!

I am hoping to receive some interpretations on readings I received earlier today about my floundering relationship.

Here is some background: We have been together for 3 years, of which the first 6 months were magical, and then it swiftly changed after that. Since then it has been tumultuous, nerve-wracking, and simply confusing to me. We separated 2 weeks ago, but are committed to a living arrangement for the next half year. He approached me again today about wanting to remain together and start afresh.

My questions to the I Ching this morning were as follows:

What will happen for me if we get back together? 10 unchanging
Is is a good idea for us to get back together? 29.2 changing to 8
What will happen for me if we separate permanently? 1.2.3.5.6 changing to 51
What should I do about my current situation? 41.1 changing to 4
What will he offer me long-term? 3.5 changing to 24
Can I trust him? 7.3 changing to 46

Maybe I have, in part, gotten confused with my interpretation because I asked so many questions, but I really am befuddled with this relationship. Better said, I am really confused with his conduct in our relationship.

Any insights? I'm curious to hear the interpretation of someone who is emotionally unattached to this.

Much appreciated!
 

gene

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Hello PurpleDawn

Too many questions to give a full answer to. But first of all, if he says he wants to stay together, then why are you confused? Have you determined what you want to do?

Hexagram 10 has to do with protocol and conduct, but here you just need to understand that "You do not get burned, so to speak." It indicates success. However, it is necessary to figure out what kind of success. It seems there is a lot of danger. You are "treading on the tail of the tiger. As far as hexagram 29 line 2, It says that great success cannot be attained. But small things may be done. In other words, don't expect a lot out of this.

You need to figure out what it is that is causing the problem, and then decide what you want to do, and that is the question you might ask the I Ching, something to the effect of, "What is causing the problem?"

Apparently there is an issue of trust. Now I see that that might be causing the problem. What is causing that issue? That might be something to look into more deeply. According to 7 line 3, it is not so promising. You need to figure out why you don't trust him. You will have to look deeply into this situation.

Gene
 

purpledawn

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Firstly, thank you for your response.

I'm confused because I have come to realize he has been unfaithful, dishonest, and fickle, as well as stating increasingly over the last 6-9 months that we should just simply separate because we are at different phases in our lives.

I entered this relationship wanting a long-term commitment, even sharing with him prior to dating that I want to ultimately marry and have family someday. And I shared with him my willingness to wait until he felt ready; which has become a shifting timeline for him.

My instincts have continued to warn me that something is amiss here. A month before we planned to move in together, another woman (his girlfriend of 9 years) whom I knew nothing about contacted me to confront me about our relationship & plans to move in together.

I decided we could overcome this together so long as we were truly committed to each other and willing to work on it, ie. rebuilding trust.

There have been various other minor instances of untrustworthy and/or odd behavior (for example, disrespect and negative talk) on his part which I've elected to overlook the last years. But then, the other day, he tells me his last names and birth month are different than what I know them as! Even different than what he put on our marriage license about 18 months ago.

At that point, I ended the relationship; although we are still sharing the same living space. Since then, within the same conversation he'll tell me he wants to start anew together and yet, that he finds it best for us to separate. I get the sense he's just playing mind games.

Based on your suggestion, I just asked the I Ching "What is causing problems with he & I?" The answer is 4.1 changing to 41.

I had really been trying to remain supportive, enthusiastic, and committed to this relationship, but all this does not seem to bode well.

What is your take on it, including the last reading, Gene?
 

gene

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purpledawn

I think the answer is right there. You do not trust him, and to be honest, I don't think he can trust himself, and is probably pretty confused himself. Hexagram 7 line 3 is not very promising. There are better fish in the sea.

Gene
 

long yi

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Can I trust him? 7.3 changing to 46

占婚姻以體為主,用為婚姻。用克體,不可成,成亦有害.

In English, this means the upper trigram is earth (mountain), the lower trigram is wood. Wood suppresses the earth. For marriage inquiry, this will not lead to a marriage.

This love relationship is already finished. Forget it.

Hexagram 10 means if you are in love with a man. It is a man with a girl-friend or wife. He is attached. Your affiliation is abnormal. In addition, you have male friends.

What should I do about my current situation? 41.1 changing to 4
Take the loss. Avoid any future disaster (change line).

The relationship is over and will not result in a marriage.
 

purpledawn

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Long yi, I appreciate your interpretation, but your reading of my having male friends (referencing an inappropriate relationship) is false. How did you come to that???

Thank you kindly.
 

long yi

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出生时间:年 性别:女 起卦方式:直接指定
起卦时间:2012年08月06日18时57分
起卦农历:壬辰年六月十九日酉时
神煞:天乙—子申 福星—未 日禄—午 羊刃—巳 驿马—巳 桃花—子 华盖—未
干支:壬辰年 丁未月 己亥日 癸酉时
旬空:午未  寅卯  辰巳  戌亥

Hexagram 10
六神  伏神    艮宫:天泽履 
         【本 卦】
勾陈       ▅▅▅▅▅ 兄弟壬戌土  
朱雀 妻财丙子水 ▅▅▅▅▅ 子孙壬申金 世
青龙       ▅▅▅▅▅ 父母壬午火  
玄武       ▅▅ ▅▅ 兄弟丁丑土  
白虎       ▅▅▅▅▅ 官鬼丁卯木 应
滕蛇       ▅▅▅▅▅ 父母丁巳火  

Line 4 is your soul (metal, monkey) and line 2 is him (officer line, rabbit, wood).
Metal suppresses wood. Both are yang line. There is no compatibility. Plus, you two has a fight (tiger vs bird) in the two lines.
Line 3 is another person (ox, earth) who merges with the hidden character female under line 5 (rat, water). This is possibility a man with an merger to a female.

It is extremely exhausting to use the metal in line 5 to produces that female in hidden line 5.

You cannot control him. He left, he comes back and he is free to any association with any female into the future.

If you still have anything to do with him when he starts to have other females, this association in considered improper by Iching teaching.

One yin line (female) and five yang line (male) means that the female has male friends (social friends that's all).

If you still fall for someone with another female attachment, that crush is considered improper. This may refer to any association under the same roof with your ex.

Line 1 is the marriage document (snake, fire) who is empty under your house of spouse. This document is still attached to line 5 (metal, monkey). That is a hollow affiliation in your heart with perhaps him.
 

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