Help with hexagram 55 lines 2 & 6

[hebe]

Hello - my first post, although I have been following for some time. My husband, who I love very deeply, is wanting to leave to follow the pull of his heart and cycle around the world, but without committing to coming back to me, as he doesn't know what will happen. He wants to end up in his native NZ. I understand his calling, but am holding back the grief & confusion and the fear as we work together in a job that also gives us accommodation - so I would lose all 3 not if, but when, he goes. He hasn't decided when as he wants to make sure that I am ok and set up with some kind of plan & career training. It feels frightening & yet I know its going to happen so I have to make plans. Stating the obvious I suppose, I asked the I Ching for guidance ' it feels so chaotic with Paul's leaving plans, I don't know what to do or where to go. Please could I have some guidance.' and it gave me 55 lines 2 and 6. My initial fear was that it could see me in isolation for 3 years if I'm not careful..possibly because of being so fearful. 55 seems from all the threads to be about big life changes.. but it seems an awful prospect and now seems worse with line 6. Please any help with this? Hebe

 

[Trojina]

With 55 everything is coming at you at once...many options, confusion and yet you have all you need already to make a decision...believe it or not. I see this as confirmed by the fact that you have 14 as relating hexagram...which is 'having' or 'great possession'..so it seems from these not that you are stranded all alone without ideas or resources its just reaching the place you can make a decision about what to do next...because its all so bewildering as you know. 55.2 i think says you don't feel you can see clearly what to do yet you do have an instinct, a feeling for the way to go...there is a light in the far distance, and you can sort of feel your way to it even if it seems like you don't fully know what you are doing ? Don't worry that 55.6 means you'll be alone for 3 years...I think its merely a warning that holding back on acting on your instincts or ideas is not a good idea now. If you have any hunches, any inner promptings (55.2) on the way to go, explore them...don't isolate yourself, maybe go outside your comfort zone in approaching any help you need. Its not the time to stay by yourself worrying or being over cautious...yet you may be tempted to because it may feel strange, out of the ordinary for you to take some of the initiatives here...but in 55.6 you have to 'march out' rather than 'stay in mourning'. I think it refers to the story in 55 where it was customary for the prince (?) to stay in mourning for his father yet there was a battle needing to be fought so he broke with the custom and went out to fight.(er well something like that ) Thats what you have to do...also bear in mind hex 14 as relating often suggests you really focus on what you already have and utilize that rather than focus on what you don't have...for 14 shows you do have what you need...even if it certainly doesn't feel that way !



BTW my personal feeling, nothing to do with the reading, is this is really hard on you ...hes your husband and he wants to go but can't tell you if hes coming back ?...well you know the situation better than me...but.......

....the other possibility to bear in mind is sometimes questions aren't answered directly and your answer may even refer to the situation between you and him ? Though the way you descibe the feelings of chaos and so on does sound very 55ish, so to me right now it seems more likley it is answering your question directly.

Anyway you are probably in a much stronger position than you think... Take a deep breath and march out of that mourning hut in 55.6.

 

[gato]

i don't believe he will go. just empty plans, they will die quickly.

 

[chucklesthegirl]

Hi, Hebe.

I am new and not as knowledgeable as many of the more senior members of this forum, but I would like to help you.

From what I understand about hex 55, it describes a zenith event, meaning that once it reaches it's peak, that's it. That could be a good thing as perhaps this means that things will improve from here.

I like to use LiSe's site for insight into the varying lines and hexagram meanings.

For your reading you have lines 2 and 6 of hex 55 moving to hexagram 14.
LiSe says:
Line 2: "Feng was so obscured at noon the Dipper was seen. To proceed brings suspicion and hate. Having verification, Fa gathers. Auspicious.
Circumstances can be totally frustrating. So imagine your life, according to what you truly are or want. Some write their life in concrete, others in their mind, it does not matter how you write it – just do it. Your conviction will make others join in. When one has the mandate, one can act, no matter how bad the omens are or how much doubt others have."

This sounds like perhaps how your husband is feeling right now. He feels as if he is compelled to undertake this goal no matter how it may affect you or your lives together.

Line 6: "In Feng screening off his house from his family, peeping through his door, living alone without people. In three years not seeing anybody. Pitfall.
You are the center of your life, so be present there. No reason can be important enough to screen yourself off. See all that happens and react if necessary, make your own fate, don’t let fate just happen and don’t let others decide about your fate."

This line also appears to be about your husband, though you may feel as if you are isolated, it is him who is separating himself off from you, his friends, his work.

IMO hex 14 points to a certain overzealous desire...just something that tends to be in great measure. Could emphasize the critical nature of hex 55 and the moving lines.

Sometimes in my own readings, I have noticed that hex 55 can portray a kind of distorted thinking, like the kind that goes along with heavy depression or just a feeling of being overwhelmed with stress or anxiety.

Do you think your husband could be going through some sort of depressive spell or even possibly a midlife crisis?

 

[willowfox]

I asked the I Ching for guidance ' it feels so chaotic with Paul's leaving plans, I don't know what to do or where to go. Please could I have some guidance.' and it gave me 55 lines 2 and 6 > 14

It would seem that his main thought is of himself and his need for freedom, therefore you need to learn to adapt to the changing circumstances, and don't try to hold him back or whatever as that would be counterproductive and cause him to become distant.

So, what can you do, nothing to stop him and don't try, but rather many things to encourage him to go, help him because he needs to find whatever is supposedly "missing" from his life. I don't know how old he is, but if he is around 29/30 years old then blame his behaviour on a Saturn return.

 

[hebe]

Thanks to you all - I need to think about your answers and let them digest. Initially, I was ridiculously happy to hear from you all and feel the support - it brought tears to my eyes, which probably in indicative of the underlying stress & anxiety of all of this. I will go to the post reply bit now and can reply in depth. Off on holiday to Wales on Friday - tommorrow - so it will be a good break for us - you wouldn't know anything was going on as we are just the closest of friends, lovers, mates etc - just this almost inevitable compulsion - as chucklesthegirl said - for him to move into his freedom (as willowfox said).

 

[hebe]

Response from Hebe

Thank you very much for all your insight. Willowfox, he's a Scorpio 1960 so will be approaching his 50th, which has been on his mind - ' if I don't do it now, I never will'. Your thoughts were very accurate as I have learnt from the past that anything to discourage a mindset he has will bring distance. I know deep in my heart that he has to do this and he said that, unlike, perhaps, other men, he really doesn't know what lies ahead and therefore can't give me 'false promises' that he will 100% return. He wants to go back to NZ - I lived there for 7 years and got very low & was forced back by an accidental illness in India and loved being back here in UK a couple of years ago. He doesn't want me just to follow him, but to be strong in my self and stand in my own space & decide where I want to be for this short life. Its not that he won't have me there, but he wants me to make my own mind up. So, I do have to go with his flow - but as Trojan said, its about trusting myself and my resources - which everything points to me having, including my extraordinary acceptance of this deep down - although I know I am holding back a wailing storm of grief - but one which will possibly die down quite quickly as I rise to the challenge of getting on with my own stuck life. Chucklesthe girl - you are right about this 'compulsion' - yes, it does feel like that for him - maybe just a sense of destiny somehow. It's crossed my mind that he will be facing line 6 himself and that is a possibility as he is such a strong loner who loves his freedom - but I also agree that as Trojan says, its a warning - just a warning to heed & be aware of in my own behaviou. I will have to 'march out' that's for sure - and in strong moments like now, sitting in my gloriously pretty cottage with a secure job & all the comforts - but its when I think of that all going that I panick. But Trojan, there IS a wee hunch - even if its wrong, & I have to follow the threads when he goes (if, Gato) and TRUST.

Still want to think about your replies and insights. All very much appreciated, Hebe