How Can I Win His Love? 43.2 to 49

[Enlightenment23]

There's a guy in my life that my heart yearns for, but he's a womanizer and a commitment-phobe. Still, I have a sliver of hope that he just might settle down if he meets the right woman -- and I'm wishing its me.

I did an I-Ching reading and asked "How can I win his love?"

I got Hexagram 43.2 changing to 49.

What could this mean to you? Please be brutally honest. Thanks =]

 

[innertruth]

You must not move until major changes completed, i believe in ways he behaves towards women. Only then your plan can work and there is a favorable promise.
Meanwhile forearmed is forewarned. By being aware of his shortcomings, aware of the dangers that a union with him might entangle,
you are protected from harm.

 

[Enlightenment23]

I understand. Thanks Inner Truth. It's not until he completely changes his mentality about how he sees women that I can "win him over."

For now, I see that this reading is telling me to stay alert and that being with him would bring a lot of difficulties.

Thank you so much for clarifying this reading for me! Much appreciated and it is very conducive to the situation that I am going through

 

[innertruth]

It means as you perfectly described to be aware of dangers that being with him could provoke. So even if you are with him, you know his ways, and not a subject to some unpleasant surprise.
The line itself speaks of the night time, where dangers such as robbers or else is present. It does not mean it will necessarily materialize, however it further says if you are well armed to meet any danger,you have nothing to fear.
While with him, awareness is the key.

 

[innertruth]

49.2 could also mean that it is you who are ready for a decisive change, but you need to think through such change, thats is where forewarned forearmed line comes up.

 

[sooo]

Why do women think they can change a man? I think this reading has two meanings, at least. One is that 'a speaking staff' is who one is, and any change will be for a time only. Two is that I think line 2 speaks to your own sense of peace and concord, with things as they really are.

Another peculiar thing I've observed over many years. A woman falls for a guy for the way he is, very often traits like being his own man, maybe a rebel, a loner, an artist. Then they marry, have a child, and at first he may even appear to conform to his new role, but before too long he reverts to his original and actual ways, only now this angers her; she resents and even hates the very things which attracted her to him in the first place. If he yields to her will, that's not satisfying either because she has lost what she was originally attracted to.

Brutally honest? Forget him. Move on and be content.

 

[Enlightenment23]

49.2 could also mean that it is you who are ready for a decisive change, but you need to think through such change, thats is where forewarned forearmed line comes up.

Uh oh....that forewarned, forearmed line doesn't seem like a good omen for a relationship. I don't always want to have to be on my guard in a relationship -- that sounds exhausting, no? Haha. But thanks once again for your interpretation.

 

[Enlightenment23]

Why do women think they can change a man?

For me, there's something alluring about attracting the interests of the bad boy rogue -- that's because it's much more satisfying to win the affections of an elusive man. I am wowed and I say, "What is it about me that has allowed him to soften up and settle down, despite his past transgressions?"

So there's something much more rewarding about changing a man -- being the cause of his growth and development. But the problem is, like you say, there's a very small chance that this man really is willing to change his ways.

I think this reading has two meanings, at least. One is that 'a speaking staff' is who one is, and any change will be for a time only. Two is that I think line 2 speaks to your own sense of peace and concord, with things as they really are.

Well that tells me that he'll always be a scumbag, huh?

Another peculiar thing I've observed over many years. A woman falls for a guy for the way he is, very often traits like being his own man, maybe a rebel, a loner, an artist. Then they marry, have a child, and at first he may even appear to conform to his new role, but before too long he reverts to his original and actual ways, only now this angers her; she resents and even hates the very things which attracted her to him in the first place. If he yields to her will, that's not satisfying either because she has lost what she was originally attracted to.

Brutally honest? Forget him. Move on and be content.

Thanks for your brutal honesty.:bows: And awesome anecdote! As much as I'd love for him to change, this reading is just not looking promising. And if we did end up together, I don't think I'll be as happy as I think I would be.

 

[sooo]

Well that tells me that he'll always be a scumbag, huh?

Um, owie. Just speaking from personal experience. LOL

What's the old saying? You can't change the stripes on a tiger nor the spots on a leopard. All you can do is lock them in a cage. I never understood why they chose those examples for 49.5 and 6. Or maybe that's really the whole point. The Great Man doesn't change his stripes?

Before bed last night I watched the classic movie: Urban Cowboy. He did change in the end, in a positive way, but not until after a lot of rough riding, for he and his new wife, who was quite the tigress herself. Maybe that's the secret.

 

[kincadefoster]

"What is it about me that has allowed him to soften up and settle down, despite his past transgressions?"

So there's something much more rewarding about changing a man -- being the cause of his growth and development. But the problem is, like you say, there's a very small chance that this man really is willing to change his ways.

If anyone changes, it isn't FOR YOU... stop being codependent and find someone who treats you the way you really want to be treated. I realize us nice guys aren't as "exciting", but the day will probably come eventually you will wish you took a chance on a nice guy.