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How to meet the father of my children? 36.1>15 and 49.2>43

Olga Super Star

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I have no children and sometimes wonder if I will ever meet a man in time to have children of my own.

I asked in the past about my fertility.

This time I asked How to meet the father of my children? 36.1>15
Brightness hidden
Flying away
His wings hanging down
The noble one is on the move
For three days eats nothing
Has a direction to go.
Those in authority have something to say.


Me Mother 49.2>43
Your own day
So make radical change
And set out to bring order: good fortune, no mistake


The second cast makes me think if I had a man right now I would be able to get pregnant.

But 36 on how to meet someone makes me think it would be risky? 🤔 I have to conceal my true nature?
Can’t be.
Maybe it’s an invitation to avoid such an encounter, maybe it wouldn’t do me good to meet a man and have children?

Open for suggestions ..
 

marybluesky

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What a cute question!

How to meet the father of my children? 36.1>15
Move in the direction of finding him but slowly, don't expect much. It's not the time to be seen.

Me Mother 49.2>43
You can decide to be a mother when the time is right; in your own day,
 
L

legume

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How to meet the father of my children? 36.1>15
maybe it's one of those literal readings, are you planning a journey or at least a walk? ;)
there's a place to go to and there's possibly a master or a host, does that give you any ideas? a trip of some sort with a sleepover?

that is if you're considered the noble one. but it could also be that he's the noble one, so if you wanna meet him just keep your eyes peeled for a hungry guy on the move? :D to be fair I've actually no clue...

as to 49.2>43 not sure about this based on the question itself. it could well be that you might completely change your mind on the matter and that's the good fortune of the situation, or that once you're certain of what you want, you'll get it.
 
W

Willem D

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Hi Olga Superstar,
Here is my take on 36.1 > 15

If you put aside the text and only look at hex. 36 and the trigrams of which it is composed, you see the image of a situation where brightness, clarity and truth (trigram Fire) can not be expressed because of a passive situation/environment (trigram Earth).

Trigram Fire is unbalanced because line 1 is moving -> too much yang energy.
Position 1 is the position of the beginning, the idea, the formless. So this moving line in trigram Fire suggests too much worry, overthinking, too certain, wanting to controle, etc.
Unbalanced Fire is balanced by trigram Mountain (lower/inner trigram of hex. 15). This says keep still, turn inwards, meditate, take a step back, let go etc. The upper trigram in hex. 15 is still Earth -> passive situation/environment.

So the way I see 36.1 > 15
'No matter how much I worry or think about how to meet the father of my children, I am not in a position or situation to make something happen at this moment. So I take a step back, let go and relax.'

Hope this will help you!
 
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Topher

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I think you are adviced to whoever you think will have a relationship with to not tell them the idea you would like to have children because like 36's core meaning is hiding what you really feel/want but in 36.1 the man deserts when he sees evil meaning probably that having children might be seen as something that cause them fear. so as 49.2 suggest sooner or later(on your own day) you will have children because you can but you have to not be ovrly defensive or pushy with the idea with this person(as 43.2 mentions)
 
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Liselle

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I think you are adviced to whoever you think will have a relationship with to not tell them the idea you would like to have children
I doubt that sort of deception is a good idea.

in 36.1 the man deserts when he sees evil meaning probably that having children might be seen as something that cause them fear
Olga didn't ask what she should say to the potential father, she asked how she can meet a potential father. Therefore the line pertains to Olga, not the man.
 

Topher

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I doubt that sort of deception is a good idea.


Olga didn't ask what she should say to the potential father, she asked how she can meet a potential father. Therefore the line pertains to Olga, not the man.
It isnt deception men sometimes feel fear with something that could be possibly too much responsability take for example engagement for a long term relationship(I havent considered having children myself but I know commitment gave me a huge fear even though I loved that one person). now think that there is a slim possibility that whoever she meet has that fear or sees having children as a bad thing. 49.2 as anwer could be on her own day she could tell him that she wants to have children
(why do I consider this line to be for the man? because it's a yang line) but possible a better view could be obtained checking the trigrams for what sort of action to take
she asked how she would meet he father's children, one possibility among milllions to meet her father's children is not telling that the need for her relationship is having children. there could be many other men and even many more different advices but maybe the possibility with the man she might meet in the nearby future is this.
 
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marybluesky

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men sometimes feel fear with something that could be possibly too much responsibility take for example engagement for a long term relationship(I havent considered having children myself but I know commitment gave me a huge fear even though I loved that one person). now think that there is a slim possibility that whoever she meet has that fear or sees having children as a bad thing. 49.2 as anwer could be on her own day she could tell him that she wants to have children
OMG, this reminds me of myself when a guy I loved to the point of obsession started to talk about children and how I should treat our potential kids; and that made me feel suffocated in the throat to the point that it was hard to breathe for a few moments, as if the throat was physically blocked.
 
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Willem D

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I think you are adviced to whoever you think will have a relationship with to not tell them the idea you would like to have children because

The question is "How to meet the father of my children?" and not "What to do when I meet somebody while I have a wish to have children".
 
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Topher

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The question is "How to meet the father of my children?" and not "What to do when I meet somebody while I have a wish to have children".
Well in my interpretation sometimes to know someone you have to know how to act with them. I dont think iching always gives a prediction on how you will meet someone but how to do something in order to achieve your goal. there are times I have asked on how to act about something and the iching has told me how I would meet someone and didnt answer my original question

she could try asking if this person would like to have children in the futurethen see whether or not this line fits the answer from this person then she will know what the hexagram meant.

OMG, this reminds me of myself when a guy I loved to the point of obsession started to talk about children and how I should treat our potential kids; and that made me feel suffocated in the throat to the point that it was hard to breathe for a few moments, as if the throat was physically blocked.
To be honest in that occassion I was telling I was going to gift her something made of silver(It was a silverneck lace with a silver heart ) I know she mentioned is it a silver ring? are you going to propose me? and I felt like I wanted to flee away from there(even I was just sending her a text) I told her it was too soon to talk about commitment
later I saw that I had found something special and I saw I was losing her since she got angry with me(at the time she talked about a engagement ring and when she got mad she said we were friends and she said she only said "I loved you" and"I want you" and"I miss you" because the support and conform I gave her..., since when friends gift each other engagement rings and propose to them?, WTF)
 
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Olga Super Star

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Me Mother 49.2>43
You can decide to be a mother when the time is right; in your own day
That is a nice answer. But I'm getting older and older.. I guess if the time is not right this year, there are little chances I will ever be (unless I adopt).

maybe it's one of those literal readings, are you planning a journey or at least a walk? ;)
there's a place to go to and there's possibly a master or a host, does that give you any ideas? a trip of some sort with a sleepover?
I was indeed, yes. But while corona is around, it's difficult. But I was planning a long walk in Europe and a big trip in the Middle East. About a month long.

as to 49.2>43 not sure about this based on the question itself. it could well be that you might completely change your mind on the matter and that's the good fortune of the situation, or that once you're certain of what you want, you'll get it.
Yes, some time ago I had 24 UN about that, which meant "turn out from this idea". It's more a wish of my Mom's but she gets into my life so much that her wishes get confused with mine.

'No matter how much I worry or think about how to meet the father of my children, I am not in a position or situation to make something happen at this moment. So I take a step back, let go and relax.'
Thank you, that can also be it.


so as 49.2 suggest sooner or later(on your own day) you will have children because you can but you have to not be ovrly defensive or pushy with the idea with this person(as 43.2 mentions)
This on your own day makes you two feel I can get pregnant. I am curious to know what will happenn. And I shan't be pushy, of course!

It isnt deception men sometimes feel fear with something that could be possibly too much responsability
Yes, that happens a lot with men. I have to say I often fantasize about getting pregnant and letting him know after a few months. I never have the idea of forming a traditional family in a traditional way. I see pregnancy as something happening to me, not to me and someone else - which is what actually happens in real life. Men are socially constrained into something that doesn't belong to them.

Thank you all for your kind thoughts - I shall update!
 

marybluesky

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That is a nice answer. But I'm getting older and older.. I guess if the time is not right this year, there are little chances I will ever be (unless I adopt).
Your own day is the day you can do what you want. So, maybe the line invites you to decide & go & get pregnant. Recently there was another thread on the subject. I don't remember its title. There, Trojina had suggested that the querent find a man to have a child, without him being necessarily the "partner material" or the "father material".
 

Olga Super Star

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You mean a man whatever?

It's not easy to find one. They are very careful nowadays to always wear protections especially if you are not their girlfriend, but also if you are.
 

marybluesky

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Here's the post I mentioned.

Of course you may be in a different situation, and I can't say how 49.2 applies in your case.
That said, I didn't mean getting pregnant by an unwilling man. I rather thought about some sort of contract where both of you focus on having a child. For example, finding a man on a dating site who wants children, but may not be that attractive to you. Just a thought.
 

Olga Super Star

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Thank you but insemination is not my thing.

To share parenthood with someone you don't know could turn into a nightmare. I know of women who can't even accept a job in another city as the father of their child wouldn't allow them to move. They are forced to be unemployed in the city where the father lives, and be kept by him.

I want to feel free to move wherever and not depend on a stranger's dictations.

I guess those magic encounters that happen in your 20s are rarer and rarer as you get older.. I am glad I didn't get pregnant in my 20s. Looking back, I would probably do it all different. Here now it's constant unemployment which lowers your self esteem. My friends who got a job before 2008 are doing fine. I wasted my best years.

Usually people either focus on family or on their careers. I feel I missed both. Also all the people I know and that have been around me are dying. I have always been around elderly people. All my energy was put into my 80 year old aunts and acquaintances for so long that I have no friends at the moment. Well I have but they are scattered around the globe. Immigrants to other countries or cities.

We are all very connected, knowing what the other person is eating tonight for dinner, but spend New Year's Eve alone. Is that the Liquid Life recalled by Bauman?
 
L

legume

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in the light of what you shared about change of travel plans and the influence of your family, maybe this quote from Bradford's commentary on 36.1 could also be of help in a way:

"Since gossips will talk anyway, if he (the noble one) says anything now he might plant some well chosen rumors to send them off in a different direction. But he also has a right to stay silent if any thing said can be used against him."

and also another bit from 49.2: "Thus we wait until we can point to the day when the old starts falling apart: it’s time for alertness, not certainty."

i would see the two readings complementing each other, 36 giving some advice on how to raise above the opinions of others, a "day" in 49 indicating a cycle or an end of a cycle. not sure if you're into numerology, but, depending on your date of birth, mid 30's for some can actually be just end of the first of the 3 main life cycles. so your own "day" could be metaphorically speaking of some start of time in your life when the previous misconceptions or influences of others are being shed, while you only begin to find comfort and confidence and basically yourself in your own skin? the commentary says to stay open to what comes, rather than seek certainty at that point.

i also feel this could mean that becoming independent from the influence of mother and aunt's opinions (36.1 - those in authority who have something to say ;)) will help you find the right guy / make the right decision about your own future.
 

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