I need your help please.

[jojo]

Hi. I?m writing to get some help with the answers I got to my question. I have my own thoughts on what I was given but I wanted to get other peoples thoughts as well. I?m in a relationship that has been somewhat strained for a long time. I love this person but there are essential things missing from this relationship. Through a strange series of events, I met another person who I?ve been having a bit of a relationship with. Well, the first person found out about the second person and needless to say, was not pleased, even though there has not been any physical contact. And this brought things to a head. My question was: In light of what this situation has become now, what should I do?

I got hex 34 with lines 1, 2, 4, & 5 moving towards hex 39. I wasn?t quite sure about that answer so I asked for clarification and I got hex17 with line 5 moving toward hex 51.
Like I said, I have my own ideas about what this means but I would really like some more input.

 

[jte]

Hi, Jojo -

It seems like you're partway out of one relationship and partway into another. To me, this indicates that you're not really sure how you feel - do you want to stay with the person or do you want to move on?

It's not always easy to know. Maybe one thing you should do is take some time to really get in touch with how you feel and what you want to do. What do *you* want, based on how you feel; also what is the *right* thing to do given the details of your situation, consider both.

I think that *after* you figure that out, your 34 lines will make lots of sense - which one is the "toe" that is not worth advancing with (and to whom, perhaps, a relationship with you is not of much benefit); which one is the "goat" you should lose (and who will lose you). And in which direction advance will be made beneficially (lines 2 and 4).

To me, there are 2 lines in 34 for each side of your decision.

17.5 is a beautiful line - but I'm not sure how it applies... Maybe the one who is "sincere in the good" is the one you should pick - not sure though.

Hope this helps. If I'm being way out of line, well, my apologies...

- Jeff

 

[heylise]

My imression, only from looking at the hexagrams:
34 You are the one now who has the power. No need to 'do' anything, except finding your own best way to stand in life.
39 by beginning anew.
With 'do' I mean, acting to the outside, mending things. If you can use it for a higher goal, finding your own new start, then it is a very big power.

17 You bring value into a relationship, but the other one too. Is it enough, on both sides?
51 It is very good that things get shaken up, it is the only way to really find out.

LiSe

 

[jojo]

Thank you. Anyone else...?

 

[RindaR]

Jojo-

I'm wondering if the obstruction might have had something to do with a rigid expectation somewhere - yours for the other? the other for you? you for yourself?

...removing it might be a matter of concentrating on being rather than on doing/controlling as you work toward managing the discomfort that has been generated by the unmet expectation?

This is consistent with LiSe's read if you see backing off a bit as consistent with mending things. Life is what you make it, and sometimes simple awareness/how you see the ownership of problems can change them incredibly.

Rinda

 

[jojo]

Does anyone want to explain how they dealt with the 4 moving lines in the first casting?

 

[candid]

Hi Jojo,

First, its important to understand that the Ching is based on a set of high ideals. Based on these ideals it is said that power and rightness must become one and the same. That means seeing the big picture, not just the part we want for ourselves at the moment.

Your change lines show levels of power, beginning with the toe (lowest) in line 1 to the highest in line 5. In the highest, one gives up stubbornness and yields to move more easily along the path of least resistance toward your goal.

17 reinforces this with the idea of allowing yourself to be led by your highest ideals (line 5).

51 is remaining calm in a storm.

Sometimes by insisting on having our way we achieve exactly the opposite. By making our aims clear to ourselves we can then persevere in the right way and at the right time to accomplish our goal.

Candid

 

[jte]

I thought more about your casting after I posted, so since you want more, I'll suggest the following interpretation:

If you go with the new guy, you are the strong 34.2 who advances and your original love interest is the weak 34.5 who "loses the goat with ease" - i.e. loses you, but maybe it's not so bad, since you both appear to be having a difficult time of it.

If you stick with the original love interest, you are the strong 34.4 who continues the advance (past line 3, which was not drawn but can be seen to represent the difficulties you are having) and your new love interest is 34.1 who expends his strength on you but the effect is just a flash in the pan. (Naturally, if things fizzle out between you, this new person will seek love elsewhere, since things hadn't progressed too far...)

So there are two correlated pairs represented in the reading, you and your original love interest and you and the new potential love interest - which possibility becomes actual depends on your decision to go with one or the other.

The good part is that you are calling the shots either way. But remember, the hex calls for strength WITH morality. Of course, it's not for me suggest what's morally right, having no idea of the particulars of your relationship(s).

All above is IMHO, of course. Others might interpret quite differently...

- Jeff