Insight into a broken relationship next steps

[cristal]

I am in a difficult relationship moment. My friend and I broke up because emotional issues he has and he cant address it himself, I cant do it for him. He needs a professional help. We are not talking at the moment, and I want to know how this is evolving for us, insight.

I am reading the Iching once during morning and once during evening. I want to understand how our situation is evolving even if we are not in touch. Our emotions are changing, cooling down I guess and understanding better. I want to be guided also by the Iching and understand but not sure how to interpret all, what best steps should I take,

Thursday 07 morningHex 48 Unchanging



Evening
Insight into relationship Hex 5. 5.6 >26

?

Friday 08 MorningHex 46 .1.5 > 5

Isnt it about speaking my truth? dont rush and being patient ?

Some help?


Thank you

 

[Trojina]

I am in a difficult relationship moment. My friend and I broke up because emotional issues he has and he cant address it himself, I cant do it for him. He needs a professional help. We are not talking at the moment, and I want to know how this is evolving for us, insight.

I am reading the Iching once during morning and once during evening. I want to understand how our situation is evolving even if we are not in touch. Our emotions are changing, cooling down I guess and understanding better. I want to be guided also by the Iching and understand but not sure how to interpret all, what best steps should I take,

Thursday 07 morningHex 48 Unchanging



Evening
Insight into relationship Hex 5. 5.6 >26

?

Friday 08 MorningHex 46 .1.5 > 5

Isnt it about speaking my truth? dont rush and being patient ?

Some help?


Thank you

Warning ! Danger Zone ! Hes not talking to you and you want I Ching to tell you his thoughts and how things are right now between you ? Be careful you don't lead yourself down the garden path here. Asking morning and evening each day on the same issue will surely be very confusing and the temptation to look for and ask us to reflect what you want to hear may be ultimately very misleading for you.

I think you'll know how things are when he starts talking to you again. That means waiting (hex 5) and not fretting (5.5). 5.6 may indicate if you just wait without fretting an unexpected solution may come. You got hex 5 several times here which certainly suggests the communication will come in time but meanwhile you must wait

I do not think you will be able to able to judge day to day how things are between you by casting each morning and evening. If someone purposely isn't talking to you the only thing you can be sure of is they are pretty upset with you and want you to leave them alone.

Perhaps it is your own self you need to bring back into balance now in order to cope with the situation. All you can do is leave him alone and wait. That is very hard to do I know but it doesn't really seem you have much choice.


Ask morning and night if you like of course but I don't see that it would help much. It would be better to take the advice of 5.5.6>26 to keep yourself well and free from worry and try to enjoy what you can. You holding back(hex 26) waiting easily without worry (5.5)seems really to be the best path open to you. Afterall if you carry on at this level of desperation you may make yourself ill


The advice of 5 really is to keep calm and live as normally as possible whilst waiting for progress in the situation that will certainly come about one way or the other. Having had it twice as primary and second hexagram it really seems the advice you need right now.

Knowing that there is really not much need to cast morning and evening, but I understand you will do through sheer anxiety. So a key issue I think here is not what hes doing but also handling your anxiety levels about what hes doing/thinking. Whether you love someone or not they are still their own person, a seperate person, and to wait comfortably I think you'd need to pull back to your own seperate individuality a little. You can't have peace of mind without being able to do that. Love is one thing, co dependency is another.

I'm not saying you are codependent BTW, I often think its just a label....but in previous posts you seemed to be saying there was no possibility of you standing back a little from this becasue you fell in love at first sight. I think in love or not in love its dangerous to lose our our own centre of gravity and go running too far down the road trying to save someone else. They have their own path to travel


If you just need to know he is safe, where he is and so on....not sure if you do, maybe you can find out through a mutual friend ? I think you said in another thread you do know where he is. If you do know where he is its some comfort at least. Nothing worse than someone you care for vanishing and you don't know where they are....then doing 5.5 is pretty much impossible though even then we have to try


anyway at least 5.5.6>26 is pretty clear about what your next steps should be ! Your next step is to think of ways to help yourself during this time of waiting. Whats helped before in similar times ? Maybe you could distract yourself by doing something you enjoy. That is certainly the advice of 5.5. Anything that helps you relax now is good and I tend to find 5.5 points to physical things, walking, being in the sun, eating well and so on....sitting in the sun somewhere with a cup of coffee ...anything, just don't keep stewing over it more than you can help

 

[Trojina]

BTW 5.6 asks you to keep a very open mind. The resolution to your difficulties may come in a form you really don't expect or understand, but if you are open to them they may benefit you.

If you are in a lather of agitation you may miss these 'uninvited guests' that is why I advised you to have a nice cup of coffee in the sun or something I was not merely being flippant, you do need to find ways to relax even if only for 20 minutes.

 

[cristal]

Thank you very much, really appreciated your answer. I was pbserving myself and understanding what is happening to me now. And yes I am so concern because I think he can hurt himself and I do not have idea what he is doing now. No, I cant have idea what happen. I am writing and he does not reply. And yes, I must wait otherwise I will become ill I felt it when was reading the Iching this morning. Maybe I will read it every 3 days.. Yes, I do many things and I paint. I 've painted more last days than in my whole life, still the anxiety inside because unknown what is happening to him , it is very high.

Yes, I also think co-dependency is a label, but yes I am spending too much time of my life and isnt solving a situation but probably complicating it. I will slow down, and dedidate more fully to my own life and like I said will read every 3 days.

I am highly perceptive, then I always feel him from any physical thousand miles away, but now is like if I can't find that perception and I know something happens to him, but I can only wait he is taking care of himself. The true is I wrote so much beautiful words that I cant do anything else but wait..

Thank you lots again, I will slow down and will wait till next Monday or at least till perceptions come back and I want help to understand the meaning, if I am confused.

 

[cristal]

BTW 5.6 asks you to keep a very open mind. The resolution to your difficulties may come in a form you really don't expect or understand, but if you are open to them they may benefit you.

If you are in a lather of agitation you may miss these 'uninvited guests' that is why I advised you to have a nice cup of coffee in the sun or something I was not merely being flippant, you do need to find ways to relax even if only for 20 minutes.

I am outside in my garden under a nice sun and painting painting !!

Thank you!

 

[Trojina]

Good !

One thing you can do of course is pray for him and for yourself. I don't mean it has to be a religious kind of praying...but just asking Spirit or whatever you believe in for help for him and for you. I don't know why but the 3 visitors in 5.6 often makes me think of Angels disguised as people or opportunities.

Although you cannot talk to him I don't think we are ever truly alone with our difficulties , they can be shared and heard.

If you ask for help with it it may help you to relax since its not just your problem any more if you also turn it over to Spirit...

Apologies for my religious language...its just I don't have other suitable words

 

[cristal]

I understand, I am not religious, but I pray everyday. Thank you very much! Highly appreciated.