Looking for help

[sela]

Hi, everybody! I am looking for help with my reading because being emotionally deeply involved I cannot explain the answer I Ching gave me, or I can find way too much explanations, which is the same.

Here it is: years ago I used to be lovers with this man, but living on two different continents distance put an end to our relationship. We stayed close friends, and he now has someone else. He admits his feelings for me hasn't changed a bit but he has made his peace with our living separated and being friends only. I turned to I Ching for advice in this situation because I don't seem to be able to give up hope despite of reality.

The answer was Hexagram 62 with moving lines 2nd, 4th and 5th, turning into Hexagram 48.

Please tell me what you read out of it. I know that nobody can do my job of the understanding but I'd like to know what others who are not at all involved read. Thank you very much!

 

[edge]

Hi Sela,
what was the specific question you asked? I assumed something like 'will be ever be together?' but wanted to be sure.
E

 

[sela]

Hi, Edge,
it wasn't really a question more something like "Please give me advice in this stupid situation because I cannot tell what is real and not real anymore, what am I supposed to do?" Oh and saying "I can find way too many explanations" I meant I translate I Ching's answer many different ways trying to make the best out of it for me, so I guess, I am cheating.

 

[my_key]

Hi sela
There is one train of thought that says that the Yi gets the real question that you are asking even when you don't form it into exact words. Living in hope can be a difficult place and does create all sorts of emotional backwashes.So here's one possibility of what might have been coming to you as an answer:

The answer was Hexagram 62 with moving lines 2nd, 4th and 5th, turning into Hexagram 48.

62 - Stay away from grand plans and wild imaginings
62.2 - Sticking with what you have now will bring certainty to your life.
62.4 - Whatever you choose to do it's important to meet face on the reality of the situation. It's best to keep things to yourself about how you really feel.
62.5 - Things are looking gloomy for you now, but remember every cloud has a silver lining....somewhere. Let go of what is wrapping you up for now and take a few small steps towards something, some notion that you have. See what has worked for you before in similar situations and embrace that.

48 - Find a way to use the well to bring a spring to your life. Everyone and every bit of you needs to cooperate for the benefit of the whole.

Be Well
Mike

 

[ginnie]

Transitional Time for You

I'm so sorry, Sela. You must be feeling very bad from this situation.

To me, the H48 is the context, how we all need love, and how we need to feel that people are around us and supporting us in our lives. It's so sad that your lover is far away . . .

Sometimes there is nothing to be done. We must attend to our own lives. With regard to that, don't let the mind wander to another continent where your lost man is! Keep your mind on the little things of life that need to get done; and make sure they get done. Eat properly. Count your change. Look in the mirror before leaving the house and look carefully both ways when crossing streets!!!

In other words, don't do anything with regard to this man and just concentrate on other things. Just take care of your own matters. It's a transitional time for you and it will pass.

 

[willowfox]

The answer was Hexagram 62 with moving lines 2nd, 4th and 5th, turning into Hexagram 48.

All 3 lines suggest the same answer that you won't meet and Hex 48 is the "well" which cannot move as it is in a fixed position.

As you said your friend has moved on, so any expedition to see him now would not bring about the end that you desire, stay home.

 

[rosada]

Hello Sela,

I'm seeing the hexagrams you drew as being a mirror of your situation. 62 talks about how "small things can be done; great things should not be done." I think this is simply affirming that in your circumstances - the great distance between you - it simply isn't possible to have the sort of intimate partnership you would prefer.

62.2 "Extraordinary restraint is not a mistake"
62.4 "Do not act."
62.5 "Seek out helpers."
-Wilhelm

Really nothing you can do about the situation. I think 62.5 may mean you should seek out some friend that could help keep your mind off this man.

48. advises, "The superior man encourages the people at their work, and exhorts them to help one another." Is this saying you should be happy for your friend that he has found a companion in his home town? Hard to swallow, but perhaps that is the only alternative if you wish to continue any sort of connection.

Best wishes,
Rosada

 

[sela]

Thank you all for your answers! I am so moved you read it and took the time to try to help to a stranger. It was more than helpful that you looked at my problem with your objective eyes, I have already read many comentars and many explanations, and have tried to switch them in a way to read a satisfying answer out of the Hexagrams. You kind of grabbed me back to the ground. Some of your words gave me brand new things to realize to. Thank you!

But one more trying... One of the commentars I read epxlained Hexagram 62 as to bottom something big to come, to lay the foundations (small) step by (small) step. So, do I wish for the right thing at the wrong time or do I wish for the wrong thing completely? What do you think?

 

[my_key]

HI sela
It appears from your posts that this is time of emotional turmoil for you and that you cannot see a clear outcome at the moment. While this is difficult for you it would be helpful for you to try to gain a solid perspective by continuing to work to gain the insights to your answers yourself.
My viewpoint or anyone elses for that matter is not yours.....and in all this emotional cloud there is an answer that is yours and yours alone. It is yours to find.
It might help to start thinking of things, and the times, not as right or wrong but more as the best decision (answer) that you can come to at this time. When you make the best decision at this time there is nothing else that you can do. What more can you offer beyond your best?

Be Well

Mike

 

[ginnie]

So, do I wish for the right thing at the wrong time or do I wish for the wrong thing completely? What do you think?

It means you are feeling exhausted from thinking about a romantic situation that has no answer. Attend to yourself, Sela. There is no way on earth you can attend to a man who is so far away.

 

[willowfox]

But one more trying... One of the commentary's I read explained Hexagram 62 as to bottom something big to come, to lay the foundations (small) step by (small) step. So, do I wish for the right thing at the wrong time or do I wish for the wrong thing completely? What do you think?

It says that if you stay home that is good fortune enough, as trying to go beyond the usual will cause you to fall heavily.

 

[sela]

No way I am trying to make you find my answers, guys, but I very much wanted to hear what others see when look at this situation and the answer of I Ching. It was very helpful to me because indeed I was lost in fog. Thank you for your help!!