Love issues. Pls help, total newbie.

[eastern_girl]

Hi there!

First of all, sorry for my English, I don't have a very good command of it and I'm also a newbie here.

I would very much appreciate if you could give me some interpretations of my reading. I had a few tosses about a guy that I haven't talk to at all for almost five months now. He is an ex co-worker and before I left my job, few months ago, there has been something going on between us, only he told me he was not ready for any commitment at the time, although he liked me (or so he said), as he had just ended a 5 year relationship (true, I also know his ex).

Anyway, I didn't react very well after this discussion we had, and though at first I gave him the impression I was ok with the situation, I ended up deleting him off my contacts list on Facebook. Soon after that I left my job and stopped having any contact with him, though we have friends in common. He didn't contact me either and it's been 5 months.

The thing is that I have this intuition that he is missing me, but he would not contact me unless I make the first step as I was the one giving him unfriend. He send hello through a friend two times. I know he is single at the present, but he doesn't know very much about my current situation.

So I asked I Ching these questions:

- does he think of me? Got 45.4 changing to 8. This one seems positive.
- I am kind of sceptic, so I asked the same question again. This time I got 38.3.5 changing to 1
- why doesn't he contact me first? Got hexagram 4 unchanging. Does he think I am immature?
- finally, I asked the I ching some advice: what will happen if I contact him? I got 50.2.5 changing to 33.

I could really use some help with the interpretation, as I am very confused about these results. Is the Yi saying I should just retreat and leave him alone? Is he really missing me or am I actually influencing the response by thinking of him?

Thanks a lot, your help would be very much appreciated. :bows:

 

[answeredquestions]

- finally, I asked the I ching some advice: what will happen if I contact him? I got 50.2.5 changing to 33.

I could really use some help with the interpretation, as I am very confused about these results. Is the Yi saying I should just retreat and leave him alone? Is he really missing me or am I actually influencing the response by thinking of him?

Hi Eastern Girl,

I think your English seems quite good! Welcome to Clarity . I never underestimate the power of thoughts, hopes and wishes, prayers etc.

::My interpretation of 50.2.5 > 33 for your question, "What will happen if I contact him?" ::

I would say that 33 is where you are coming from in the situation. You have been in retreat, haven't contacted him, kept to yourself and away. The advice of 33 is that you hide yourself away to preserve yourself and stay out of problems. It seems you have done just that. Maybe a problem could have started, if you had not initially retreated, because he needed space to recover from his past relationship. Actually could be a number of reasons and circumstances from either side. Everyone needs retreat now and again, to regroup.
50.2.5 could be where the really good advice is.I think 50 can mean so many things to people, and maybe you could search within to find what the ting or vessel means to you. What does it contain for you? What is it cooking?
Line 2 could be in reference to the people around the situation, the mutual friends, and the advice to not let them have influence. It does say "'The vessel contains something real" and so you don't need to worry about other's, because you know yourself there is something substantial in the vessel.
Line 5 talks about the handles of the vessel, which suggests USE of the vessel (the handles are how you move and interact with the vessel), in other words, "things are cooking". Or perhaps it is saying things are already cooking.

I think this is a pretty positive reading that you should contact him!

Take care,
AQ

 

[eastern_girl]

Hi AQ, it's good to be here!

Thank you very much for your reply. What you've said is true, not only that I've been in retreat, but I'm still not sure if contacting him is the right thing to do. He has many girls around him all the time and I'm afraid not to humiliate myself. After all, I'm the one who wanted and he's the one who refused.

I sometimes think that if he cared that much, he would have done something himself by now. You are also right about the "people around the situation", the mutual acquaintance who gives me information about him from time to time and vice versa is also an ex co-worker, not really a friend, and I think she likes him too. I've seen her a few times these months, but I have no idea if she knows about me and him (I have never told her) or what it is that she has been telling him about me (at work, they are pretty close). Complicated...

Thanks,
EG

 

[miakoda]

Eastern girl,

To further your understanding of what you received, try re-reading all of the Oracle and Image commentary of hexagram 4. skepticism of an initial answer, which prompted you to ask the same question more than once (and variations thereof), can actually lead to being told the opposite of what you are asking about or disinformation. One of the most fascinating things wbout using the Yi is that it starts to teach you right from the start about how to approach it. When you continue to ask along the same lines (trying to find out why someone doesn't call after being given an initially positive answer like 45.4, looks like another form of skepticism). Then you received 4 Unchanging, the classic answer to the initial querent who asks over and over. Don't feel badly about doing this or getting this answer (who here hasnt run smack into the wall of 4 unchanging?). Another suggestion: when looking at 4, try replacing youthful folly or the word 'ignoramus' with something that sounds less like you should be wearing a dunce cap -- newbie, perhaps?)

All in all, I'd say yours reading was pretty auspicious. Enjoy the 45.4!

Miakoda

 

[answeredquestions]

Then you received 4 Unchanging, the classic answer to the initial querent who asks over and over. Don't feel badly about doing this or getting this answer (who here hasnt run smack into the wall of 4 unchanging?). Another suggestion: when looking at 4, try replacing youthful folly or the word 'ignoramus' with something that sounds less like you should be wearing a dunce cap -- newbie, perhaps?)

Been there! What Miakoda says, yes, the "Hexagram Four Phenomena", it is the real deal. :bows:

 

[eastern_girl]

Wow, interesting, I've never seen hex 4 that way. Thanks, Miakoda! From what I understand, it looks like the Yi knows exactly what goes through my mind and is asking me to go and revisit the first answer, as it was all I needed to know. Thanks again, I'll stick to 45.4.

 

[steve]

Thanks for the post eastern girl that is one for the records
reminds me of myself ,

incredible eh,

Steve

 

[eastern_girl]

Hi, Steve! Small world, similar experiences.

How did things go for you, did you renew contact with that person? I feel I should, but I still don't have the guts. Maybe it's just my ego, don't wanna go through the same thing again.

EG

 

[steve]

Sorry i meant when you ask the same question
If you keep asking after that you will hear what you want to hear.

I was just impressed you heard the alarm bells so early,, i am just saying you learn fast thats all

Steve

 

[eastern_girl]

Thanks, everyone.

I haven't contacted him yet but yesterday the mutual acquaintance contacted me out of the blue and I made sure she knew I'm single. Anyway, today I asked the I Ching: what are his feelings towards me now?

I received 20.3.4.6 changing to 31. As I see it, the attraction is there but he is taking a step back and looking as his own life before deciding if this relationship deserves a last chance. That means the first reading was correct, he is thinking about me.