loving nasty ex and new beginnings...27.2 and 59.3.6

[Energy]

hello there,

my love life is pretty chaotic lately. i posted about choosing between two lovers before. i got 8.2.5 > 7 about whether i should continue being with a man i love but who is a very difficult, wounded man( this seemed possitive). I saw him again and he showed me his nasty side again. I asked YI if it is good for me to stay in contact with him and got 27.2 it seems pretty clear. I love him but he is not good for me.he, my ex, is quite selfish and will not fullfill my needs, still I seem to learn things from the contact...

recently I met someone else and he seems very nice. I asked about what to expect from this contact and got 59.3.6. i just met him but he seems like someone who is not affraid of being real. what could this hex be telling me?I think perhaps to make a clean cut with my ex and give new beginnings a chance. Seeing my ex prevents me from opening up to someone else, could line 3 and 6 be about this?

thank you a lot for your advice!

 

[Cathalina]

Hi.

8.2.5 -> 7 does NOT seem very positive to me (but I can understand why it would have seemed hopeful at the time). 8 itself yes, line 2 however, "do not throw yourself away by worshiping inferiors" is kind of telling you that you're associating yourself with a negative influence or giving someone of negative influence more power than they deserve. Line 5, when connected with and only with line 2, makes hex 8 pretty scary. "Proper relationship flow from proper principles..." And in my personal experience hex 7 is ALWAYS bad when connected to relationship situations. Whenever I get it either I'm in a fight with my significant other or tension is risding and leading to a fight or one of us, sometimes both, is really angry at the other. Basically whenever I get hex 7 I know the relationship is in a time of war (of course, like all hexes from the book of Change, nothing lasts forever.

It seems you have a great interpretation of your first reading. And 27.2 turns into 41 Decrease, it's very clear, decrease your contact with him, decrease his role in your life, decrease the importance you give him, etc.

59.3.6 > 48 gives me somewhat of a negative feeling (not too bad but I definitely feel the I ching WANTS you to proceed with caution). First of all, I personally don't really think the I ching is saying you need to cut clean from your ex and give the second guy a new chance. Not because that's not true (it said to decrease/cut out guy one your last question so that IS a given) but related to what you asked. The first guy wasn't part of your question. And I definitely don't think the I ching is saying you NEED to give guy 2 a chance. What can you EXPECT from the second guy... I think hex 59.3 is telling you that you what you need to do so that you can see things with the second man to their full potential. It's telling you to address your own issues. When we get off relationships, especially when the other person had big obvious flaws or when they wronged us, it's hard for us to see our own faults and easy for us to justify indulging in and hex 48 make me think that there's lots significant risk - either of you doing something wrong or of him doing something wrong that can interfere with the relationship developing into something good.

I'm sorry, I'm having a really hard time putting my finger on this. I feel like I'm not quite there with the interpretation. I really hope others can give you more helpful insight (though I suspect it'll be different from mine) so you can make the most harmoniously beneficial decision. However, bottom line, I don't think the I ching is telling you anything great about what to expect from the second guy nor is it giving you any big warnings. I think it's telling you first thing is first - sort yourself out. Find your balance. I feel you haven't quite reached it because you said 'cut clean from my ex and give this new guy a new beginning'. One thing has nothing to do with the other. The closest most near sighted dangers I see with the second guy (or any OTHER guy) - you might either be too defensive or you might do things for the wrong reasons, unknowingly treating him as if he were the answer to your problems with the first guy (we women, no actually we as people, tend to do that often). Don't see the second guy as a means of 'cutting clean' or escaping the first guy. That will either cause you to be too lenient with him or put a lot of pressure into the relationship. Hex 48 also speaks of this to me, potential, but the rope is a bit short.

 

[Energy]

Thanks Cathalina for your elaborate answer! Ill have to think about it some more..
not only what YI says but how it corresponds with my experiences, however its bizarre how exact
these readings can be sometimes..

I dont really get the hex 59.3.6, but I have difficulty trusting and relating to people in the long run so difficulty will probably be there. i just dont get this one. It could be about working on myself, as you said and focussing on this in stead of relationships. But the relating teaches me so much so a little must be there , can it mean that I should be very relaxed in this getting to know each other and leave a lot of space? I tend to get controlling..

thanks