Mistaken Bullseye

[s_dandy]

Hello again family. I am having one of those times where some answers all needed. So of course I have sought to query the Yi. I have been working with it before this of course, but this matter might need some fine tuned insights. I will explain the situation a bit.

I just recently filed for divorce which is awaiting final judgments. In the meantime I have cleared everything that I could legally close except for one thing, my bank account that I had my wife on. Seeing that her credit was horrible, I put her on the account so she would have the convenience of a bank account. I was the primary holder of course. Well In January I informed her that I would be closing the account a week after the day I gave her that information. Not to be mean I just dont like the idea of floating credit risks. Well with my life being as busy as it gets 3 months had passed by. Just recently I came to find the account to still be open, she did not close it. Much to my dismay I took a 45 minute trip to the bank in the city where my ex lives. Yes she lives 10 minutes or less away from the branch...I closed the account and unfortunately she had a little under 800 dollars in the account, meaning I would have to give her the money of course. SO Account closed I took 40 dollars for my gas expenses, by the way I paid for the divorce out of my own money. Now she has her mother threatening to sue me for expenses she helped out with when we were living in NC so many months ago before all this. As I recall though, my ex mother in law being a money grubber called day in an day out to get the monies back which we pqaid otherwise we would never hear the end of it. So as it goes, the mother in law is saying she will sue for money i don't recall owing. So here is my query:

What can I expect from my ex-mother-in-law
The response:
48 changing at 3rd and 4th lines to make :
47

As I read over it it sound like the Yi instructs to cover my bases and stand in my power and I shall not be harmed. Does that sound at all right?

Thanks for any assistance, my mind is much a mess.

 

[rosada]

First I'm not clear on your story. You say you told your wife YOU would close down the account and yet you were surprised to discover she had not closed it down? But she wasn't suppose to close it down, right? You told her you were going to. If you told her you were going to close it down and did not negotiate an agreement to share the expense of the gas money to pay for you to get there to do that, then I think it will be seen as being all your idea to close it down, you had no agreement that she would do this for you, and therefore the expense is all on you.

However, I may not understand the story right and I think that maybe what 48.2 is refering to. Perhaps you are not able to get to the bottom of things. Perhaps if you could explain your side of the story in a way that it made it clear that your ex had agreed to close down the account or pay for you to do it, then perhaps 48.3 would kick in - that is, you would be recognized as being in the right. So I think you are being told that you can expect to have to explain your position more clearly to your ex mother-in-law than you have to us here in order to get any kind of recognition of your claim. Meanwhile I think 48.2.3 changing to 47 cautions to expect that she will not acknowledge your side of the story.

 

[ben_s]

Hi S Dandy,

What's up with so many people having relationship collapses and divorces all at once? Sorry to hear about what you're going through.

threatening to sue me

This means you need a discussion with your attorney, not just with the oracle. Here are some questions I would want to ask of legal counsel. If she sued, is there any chance she could win? Is it up to the court's discretion, or is there a law that must be applied? Given that situation, do you have to do anything about the threat? How much would it cost each side to take this to court instead of settling? Should you say, "See you in court," or should you point out the futility of the empty threat, or should you say nothing at all?

Thanks for any assistance, my mind is much a mess.

Well, from where I sit, the real question is not what the mother in law might do, The real question is: how the court might respond to what the MIL might do.

48.3 Someone is available to provide clarity that is like a refreshing drink of water. But everyone overlooks the good that this person could contribute.

Is that you?

48.4 Sometimes the well is closed for repairs. But after the lining is repaired, it will be good as new, so the work is not in vain.

Is that you?

47 The lake is dried up. "When one has something to say, it is not believed." So one might as well quit arguing.

Is that you?

48 to 47: I would guess that when the lake dries up, the well might go dry too. Or maybe the well is deep enough, and so well maintained, that it is still a source of life giving water.

Which scenario applies to you?

 

[s_dandy]

Thank you again for your assistance everyone.

Rosada, I realize what I wrote came out a little confusing, sorry I was typing in a somewhat stressed condition. The agreement we had was that I was going to give her a week to close the account herself so she would have time to take out her own money as well as clear up any financial obligations she may have had set up, automatic bill payment, pending checks, ect. I figured I would give attempt to help her in that way so there would't be a untimley interruption in any of these things. She said she would do that and thats what I left with. I used the money for gas as it was very inconvenient and costly (my vehicle only takes premium) to drive there for me when she said she would have it taken care of. I attempted to explain this to the mother in law, but no, she would not hear any of it. My ex knew that I told her I would give her a week to close the account by her own means and she works right next to the bank so i figured it would work out in her favor to do it herself. I hope this clears that part up for you.

Ben_S, I did in fact attempt to call my attorney, he was out of the office all day though. AS far as my MIL winning? I really don't see how, any money that I/we (she NEVER gave us money she didn't hound to get back) received from her didn't come with permissiary notices or signature requirements, other than the marriage ceremony she paid for there wasn't anything we didn't pay back. In fact In my divorce agreement I took on all financial debt we accrued in the amount of 4,000 dollars as I have a somewhat better job, paid next to last payment on the car that is in my ex's name (my lawyer told me I was not obligated, but i try to be a good guy), left her on insurance until its final, AND left her with everything in the old place we lived in other than my PC, cloths, and other personal things. I just wanted us to go on with our lives as easy as possible you see. So no I don't think she would win, but I haven't actually talked to my lawyer yet so its still got my mind wandering. I feel it might be best to say nothing at all, these people never listen to me and they like to argue stupid things to infinity anyway.

"48.3 Someone is available to provide clarity that is like a refreshing drink of water. But everyone overlooks the good that this person could contribute.

Is that you?"
If it means I am the person being overlooked then yes, regardless of how simple I tried to make all this I will still be the evil man in their eyes, my ex's family.

"48.4 Sometimes the well is closed for repairs. But after the lining is repaired, it will be good as new, so the work is not in vain.

Is that you?"
If I can view the idea of "work" to mean doing the legwork to guard against identity theft and consulting my lawyer and the Yi then yes, plus I must admit I do still feel somewhat broken while this whole process is going on, but its in the final stages now so...

"47 The lake is dried up. "When one has something to say, it is not believed." So one might as well quit arguing.

Is that you?"
Put in that way it really opens my eyes to the fact that not only am I ceasing to be so generous to my ex, but In the most current situation it would be true that neither mother or daughter has heard me at all. I thought it would be enough that I didn't take ALL the money she had in the account to a nearby casino. Yes that sounds like me, and yes I am not going to argue with them unless legal action is a must.