newbee needs help 18.3

[polishgirl]

Hello
am new and trying to understand Iching. I was wondering if you can give me some insight to a relationship I've had.
Some background....
I was in a relationship with a military man. His whole actions towards me confused me.
He would be extremely interested in me, calling wanting to see me... then without any notice.. just stop calling me, and would not answer any of my calls. He did this 3 different times. We are now on the off stage.
My question was what happen between X and me. and got 18.3.

Hmmm working on what soiled... Is there something am doing that is scaring him off ?

Asked what is my role in X's distance towards me and got 58.1

Can you give me some insight please
Happy Holidays!

 

[lloyd]

Hi polishgirl
The sequence of the hexagrams says: Making those who follow you (17) happy you may run into problems (18). The text of 18 suggests that it furthers you to find somebody to help you deal with this in a way that would be new to you. Line 3 indicates that you have the capacities to solve this problem quick and come out the better for yourself. The transformed hexagram indicates the inner growth.
Your second question covers the same ground and is not all that clear, so I'd forget about that one.

 

[polishgirl]

Thank you for your time on this matter. I have been thinking about 58.1 and my role.
My interpretion of this is: That I shouldn't let outside opintions and or action effect the way I feel and see myself. Who knows? maybe i wanting more of his time and he wasn't able to do that, he felt that it wasn't going to be enough to satisfy my needs in this relationship.
Is this part of the meaning of 58.1?? am I on the right way path?

 

[lloyd]

I feel that your 18 answer points at a re-defining of your needs; which are not necessarily directed to a certain person (military man).
Also, you can make ANY projections on what it is that HE feels or thinks, but you will be guessing (when you question or apply the answer). Besides, HE will be there in corresponding lines. Asking questions that have your needs as a starting point, you will get personal lines corresponding with other lines that may explain how the man reacts to you.
I'm not saying it is THE approach, but it seems to work well for me.