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OK, Kind of getting the shakes about this and could use some help.

newlife123

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Around half a year ago I asked for love advice here:
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http://www.onlineclarity.co.uk/frie...this-time-concerning-love&highlight=starbucks
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This new thread concerns the same girl who works at Starbucks.
If you read the thread I posted above you will see that it didn't work out and I stopped trying
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In fact purposely have avoided seeing her completely due to not wanting to make myself feel depressed and not wanting to make her feel uncomfortable. I like(d) her sooo much.
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OK....
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On Saturday I met a friend in front a restaurant near the Starbucks she works at. Now I had to use the bathroom so I go into the restaurant and suddenly see her sitting in one of the sofas in front! We were both very surprised to see each other. So I sit down and chat with her a little and she commented on not seeing me around. The conversation was nice and then she had to go since she was just waiting on food she ordered to go. As she left she said it was nice to see me and remembered my name. She seemed different and more receptive.
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This just felt very strange and I don't believe in coincidences. The next day (Sunday) I decide to go to Starbucks just to see what her reaction is to me but I hesitated at the door and just take one of their outside seats because I didn't feel sure I was doing the right thing since I promised myself to let it go. Well within 30 seconds she comes walking out of Starbucks carrying her purse and says hi to me (using my name again) and says something about how she glad to finally get off work! So I was a bit shaken up but managed start up a conversation with her and it turns out that we have more things in common. We went to the same schools from elementary through high school (not during the same time period) and lived within a half mile of each other for many years.
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I told her a little about myself and she seemed genuinely happy and of course surprised about all the coincidental things we had in common.
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I didn't ask for her contact info or anything because I was too surprised and it just didn't feel right.
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Now today I woke up feeling extremely nervous about the whole thing. I don't know what the universe is doing throwing all this confusing karma at me. Is it setting me up for more disappointments? I have so many insecurities about myself. I feel that my divorce left me so messed up inside that I can no longer be considered relationship material. And I still don't know anything about her like if she is single or not.
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I'm feeling more relaxed now but earlier I was having a lot of anxiety, shortness of breath and couldn't focus on anything.

So I cast a new reading and get:
40.1.2.3.6 to 30. And the questions is "What is happening between me and her?" I did the reading a few minutes after the first meeting on Saturday so what happened on Sunday was after the reading.
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So what do you guys think the reading means and what do you think I should do?

thanks
 
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ginnie

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Newlife, what was your reading? I don't see it anywhere . . .
 

newlife123

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ginnie, I was so nervous earlier I forgot to post it sorry. I have edited the post and added the reading.
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Lot of things going on in my mind. I haven't dated anyone since my divorce a few years ago and I still carry a lot of trauma from the divorce too. Being with someone new would be a gift from God and would give me something to live for again.
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I guess inside I am a bit scared of letting go of my trauma too since that is how I have identified for a long time now.
 

ginnie

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Your reading suggests that this situation is like a puzzle you are in the process of solving. Line 3 cautions you not to delude yourself that you are more traumatized from your divorce than you actually are at this time. At least, that's what I make of it in this instance. The yang pattern is 26, which indicates a big buildup of tension. The yin pattern is 45, which suggests that the way forward is through getting together with her. The sixth line moving in your primary hex seems quite auspicious and indicates that there will be a breakthrough for you in this relationship. Good luck!
 

newlife123

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Thanks ginnie.
Yeah you're definitely right about still being traumatized you're also right about the tension build up.
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This whole thing has caused me so much anxiety and depression even though nothing has happened yet.
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I've been facing all these demons the last few days. Fear of being too old for her, fear of getting rejected, fear of not being good enough, fear of getting into another relationship even though inside I want to and worst of all fear of being binded to another unfulfilled desire. I've been living for the past few months trying to not have any binding desires since I am sick of being in suffering all the time.
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If I were to have thousands of unfulfilled desires, and all of them were non-binding like the desire for your favorite breakfast cereal, then I could remain perfectly content. But if I had just one binding desire remaining to be fulfilled, that would be sufficient to rob me of contentment and make me suffer.
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I really wasn't expecting karma to through this at me. It always seems to be just when you least expect it and just what you least expect. I normally wouldn't be this stressed out and could either give it a try or walk away from it. The problem is that I am so attracted to this person. So attracted that I am terrified.
 

pedra

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Release and "catching the bird of brightness"

Hi,
Do you know LiSe's website? She is always a resource for me. 40 is about release. All that tension, the intense feelings, all of the suppressed emotions...Then there's 30 and LiSe writes"Moments fly past like birds. You will have to catch them right now, to enjoy something when it happens, to seize an opportunity, to realize a flash of insight. Life is full of those bright little birds." As long as you protect yourself from all the hurt you could potentially encounter, you also shield yourself from whatever good might come of it. I'm not suggesting you go in head first, no helmet. But allow yourself to live and enjoy the moment. When you are talking to her, enjoy talking to her NOW. Enjoying everything about that moment! Her voice, her smile, the way she moves when she walks away... If you stress about what will this relationship become, will she love you in 10 months from now, will she be as in love with you, does she want to commit, you risk losing the full beauty of that one special moment that actually exists. The anxiety of wanting to know the future clouds the beauty that is NOW.
Peace.
 

eastern_girl

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Hi, Newlife!
To me, your result reads like this: liberate yourself (40) from this obsession (30). Also from negative emotions like fear and feeling not good enough. As far as I know, hex 30 is not only about brightness and clarity. It could also mean clinging to something (maybe someone). Now, you can do this two ways: cut the cords, try to forget the girl since you don't know her that well and you're not going to make any move anyway ...or, try to get the girl. What's the worst that could happen? So, you could get rejected...It won't kill you. It won't mean you're not good enough or that you're too old for her. It will simply mean she was not right for you. Someone else will be. Only you could know what's the best choice for you...I see you are experiencing a time in your life when you feel very vulnerable (been there, done that so I feel you), but don't think that your happiness and worth depend on her or anyone's response. You have to love yourself first

"I've failed over and over and over again in my life and that's why I succeed" (Michael Jordan) - When you are down, always try to get up. Don't stay there too long. Do not compare yourself to others, always fight, always believe in yourself. There is no other way. It will take time and effort, but you owe yourself that much...

I also recommend you watch JK Rowling's commencement speech at Harvard in 2008, about the benefits of failure. You can easily find it on YouTube. Very inspirational, you won't regret it.

Best of luck!
 
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newlife123

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I'll stop by and see her on Saturday. I just want to get it over with good or bad.
 

eastern_girl

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Newlife, if I were you, I'd rather ask something like what's the best course of action regarding this girl? It's a better question than your first one and I think it will give you a clearer picture. When there's a decision involved, I usually ask something like that. If I just ask what's going on, I'm never sure if Yi is advising me or just reflecting what I already know, throwing the question back at me. Peace!
 

newlife123

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Well I brought a nice snack to her store today and she was very happy to get it and her co-workers seemed happy about it too. We didn't get to talk much since she was at work after but I feel much more at easy, I was nervous all week. I don't know what will happen next but at least I made a move.
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I casted again and asked what the situation between me and her is and go hell 11 no changing lines.
 

ginnie

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Hex 11 Unchanging

Hex 11 unchanging. Heaven has descended and Earth has become elevated. Peace, and maybe even bliss. Are you walking on air?
 

newlife123

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Thanks ginnie,
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But no I'm not walking on air. I'm still very uncertain about what to do. Though I am much relieved about having made a move and getting a good reaction from it.
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I have only been with one girl my whole life and married her. I didn't even have to ask her out, it just came together. I am very inexperienced.
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I consulted Master Long Yi privately and he said that she is actually attached and confused herself as to where she is going in life and just needs a male friend for now. Master Long Yi emphasized this point.
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So I don't really know what to do next and could use some suggestions. I respect Master Long Yi's ability so much but it seems like I have never seen a positive reading from him regarding relationships. Maybe everyone who asks about relationship is asking about one that they doubt will happen and that is why they seek answers.
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I do know that I have to play this really sincerely and really smart so if you have any ideas please let me know.

Karl
 

ginnie

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Nothing is going to happen overnight. My advice to you is to take it one step at a time until you are feeling more comfortable and less inadequate. Nobody said you have to "get the girl" right away. You were married, so how inexperienced are you, really? Seems to me you have the bad habit of blaming yourself or underlining what you think are your own weak points. Do what the average person does: highlight your strengths and forget about your weaknesses.
 

newlife123

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Okay, I am going to approach her again today after work and I have no idea what to do or say. But I did a casting and got:
40.3.6 to 50
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So I hope the I Ching is real.
 

ginnie

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Good luck! Hope it turns out to be pleasant and not at all a torture . . .
 

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