Parental fixations of 18.2 and 4

[anemos]

this is actually a reading of mine but initially I would like to understand better lines 18.2 and 4.

What confuses me is that i see a contraction in those lines. In 2 one must show tolerances but in 4 no ? Bradford says in 18.2 "find the middle path". and in 18.4 speaks for drastic measures ( if I read him correct)

About what kind of fixations those lines talk about ? which are the dynamics of the relationship between the 18.2-mother and child and between the 18.4 father and child?

I also noticed that there is only one line about "mother" and 4 about "father" decays. In your experiences, if they are not about people, what the stand for?

any thoughts?

thanks in advance

 

[sooo]

any thoughts?

Yup. I associate the father as yang force, which tends toward conditional acceptance; spoils the child by being too harsh or strict or forceful, whereas the mother spoils the child by giving in to them, overprotecting, making excuses for them, etc. Conditional love is associated with the father, and unconditional love with the mother. Either or both can spoil a child. 18, to me, is first about recognizing those influences in ones life, and then being shown a way to progress over, under or around it. Not always easy to undo what's been done though, and I think not possible sometimes. But we can still, to some degree, un-spoil ourselves or a situation.

 

[bradford]

Agreeing with Bruce here.
What I intended to mean by Fixation hearkens back to the image of wind stopped by the mountain, turning stagnant. It's a fixed behavior pattern that doesn't want to learn or change. These are especially problematic when they solved a problem once (or helped to avoid facing a problem) but no longer work. The behavior keeps repeating in spite of being dysfunctional.

 

[anemos]

Yup. I associate the father as yang force, which tends toward conditional acceptance; spoils the child by being too harsh or strict or forceful, whereas the mother spoils the child by giving in to them, overprotecting, making excuses for them, etc. Conditional love is associated with the father, and unconditional love with the mother. Either or both can spoil a child. 18, to me, is first about recognizing those influences in ones life, and then being shown a way to progress over, under or around it. Not always easy to undo what's been done though, and I think not possible sometimes. But we can still, to some degree, un-spoil ourselves or a situation.

Agreeing with Bruce here.
What I intended to mean by Fixation hearkens back to the image of wind stopped by the mountain, turning stagnant. It's a fixed behavior pattern that doesn't want to learn or change. These are especially problematic when they solved a problem once (or helped to avoid facing a problem) but no longer work. The behavior keeps repeating in spite of being dysfunctional.

It didn't make sense the relating hex 56 but from what I read in your posts, now its much more clear. The situation those lines describe, seems to "imprison" the wanderer to a place its not a "home" for him. Its not his dwelling place.

its interesting the feeling of the wind being stopped and of the fire that travels.

I appreciate a lot your help
:bows:
Maria