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Please help - important question re infertility

veronica

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Hi guys,please help me with this very important for me subject:

My husband and I were recently told that our chances of conceiving a baby were minimal as my ovarian reserves are very low (I'm 41). I am devastated but have decided not to give up hope just yet. I have asked today: how to increase my chances of falling pregnant? I got 50.5 to 44. It's hex 44 which worries me - what does it mean in this case? Does it mean that I have a chance but it will get diminished with time?? Please help.

I have also asked:
What if we try to conceive naturally? Hex 63.6 to 37
What if we try IVF? Hex 19.3.5 to 5

Please help!!!
 
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meng

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Hi Veronica,

Your first reading just shouts fertility to me. I mean, carried with golden handles in line 5, is an image of carrying precious content. 44, well, there's lots of feathers flying about the meaning of this, but I think it's quite safe to suggest it represents a desire for copulation resulting in pregnancy, in this instance at least.

63.6 to 37 - gives me the impression that you may be trying too hard to bring this to completion, looking back on your earlier missed opportunities, possible anxiety in facing your future, based on whether or not you are able to have and raise a family of your own. I see this as expressed in the metaphor: soaking your head by looking backward.

IVF? I think the Yi is cautioning taking the easy way. That's what it says, not that I think IVF is easy by any means! But it refers to a comfortable approach, which usually implies trying to get by on your nature alone. I'm not seeing this a favorable.

What is favorable is to use wisdom, not the sense of urgency as though life is passing you by while you sit and wait. Rather than sit and wait, forget all that and enjoy one another more often. That's a bit of a 19/44 cocktail to 37.
 

veronica

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Thank you so much Meng, I've been sitting by my computer desperately waiting for someone to post a response:)
After my doctor broke the news to me (brutally - basically advising that the chances are minimal and to consider egg donation) I have been absolutely devastated, feeling worthless (we only recently got married and my husband was really hoping to start a family soon) and anxious about the past and the future so you are absolutely right about that. It is so difficult to relax and "enjoy each other more" under these circumstances where I feel that we don't have that much time left and now with only 1% chance of success given (10% if IVF) every month when I do the pregnancy test and it is negative yet again it is so soul destroying. Right now I do not feel like enjoying each other at all! :) Your interpretation of the hexagrams is encouraging though, so perhaps I should find a way of trying to relax (prozac? a lot of of??) and continue to try and try? (or consider other options??)
 

meng

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Right now I do not feel like enjoying each other at all!

That too is part of the 44 mind. The mind is so fixated on the end result that they can't let go enough to just let it happen. But that is exactly what needs to happen.

If my mate was wired and approached our sex life like it was a clinical baby mill, I wouldn't be sending a whole lotta love her way. She wouldn't bring out my potential.

From a guy's pov, nothing at all personal intended.

This morning I was video taping two male hummingbirds wooing one female hummingbird. He was doing the boogaloo with his fancy iridescent red head; I mean it was downright funky, dirty dancing! And she sang a song back from a higher branch, 'if you like it then you'd better put a ring on it."
 

veronica

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I know what you are saying - in my case it is not so much about baby mill but more about feeling feminine and sexy - difficult to achieve in the current circumstances but I will try to pick myself up.

Judging by the above hexagrams - is there real hope that we will conceive then?????
 

meng

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I know what you are saying - in my case it is not so much about baby mill but more about feeling feminine and sexy - difficult to achieve in the current circumstances but I will try to pick myself up.

Judging by the above hexagrams - is there real hope that we will conceive then?????

Ah, I see, thanks. Guys are dumb sometimes, or this one is anyway.

But feminine and sexy does sound like a nice place to work from, for your sake first, then for him. No sacrificial lambs here. And, yes, I do feel that based upon your initial reading, there is reason for optimism.
 

Trojina

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Thank you so much Meng, I've been sitting by my computer desperately waiting for someone to post a response:)
After my doctor broke the news to me (brutally - basically advising that the chances are minimal and to consider egg donation) I have been absolutely devastated, feeling worthless (we only recently got married and my husband was really hoping to start a family soon) and anxious about the past and the future so you are absolutely right about that. It is so difficult to relax and "enjoy each other more" under these circumstances where I feel that we don't have that much time left and now with only 1% chance of success given (10% if IVF) every month when I do the pregnancy test and it is negative yet again it is so soul destroying. Right now I do not feel like enjoying each other at all! :) Your interpretation of the hexagrams is encouraging though, so perhaps I should find a way of trying to relax (prozac? a lot of of??) and continue to try and try? (or consider other options??)

:confused: really. You think if you can't conceive you are 'worthless' ? You would take prozac to aid conception ? :confused: To me this way of thinking is a far greater problem than inability to conceive....and you do want to pass on an intrinsic sense of self worth to any child don't you.

I guess I understand if you are disapointed but I can't see how it warrants prozac...oh maybe you were joking


I will give my view of your answers next post.....
 
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Trojina

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Hi guys,please help me with this very important for me subject:

My husband and I were recently told that our chances of conceiving a baby were minimal as my ovarian reserves are very low (I'm 41). I am devastated but have decided not to give up hope just yet. I have asked today: how to increase my chances of falling pregnant? I got 50.5 to 44. It's hex 44 which worries me - what does it mean in this case? Does it mean that I have a chance but it will get diminished with time?? Please help.

I have also asked:
What if we try to conceive naturally? Hex 63.6 to 37
What if we try IVF? Hex 19.3.5 to 5

Please help!!!


50.5 does look fortunate for this question so the following answers are puzzling.

63.6 is often about dwelling on whats already gone....and I initially wondered if Yi was saying its too late. Many women these days are shocked at finding this and seem suprised....yet fertility does fall off sharply after 35 or so....it never has been as easy for a 41 year old to conceive as as 21 year old. Thats nature for you. Anyway actually this could well be saying you are seeing conception as the icing in the cake the perfect ending the story....when actually the story is still happening. There really is a need to live in the present with 63.6 as often one is dwellingon pictures of finality when theres still alot more to come. This isn't a bad answer here really....you need to forget the result of babies and start attending to the pleasure between you in your relationship.
Whether babies come or not who can say. They are a blessing when they do but if they don't then surely its meant to be that way.....oh well thats my view I guess. But I do feel it might be good to really question your sense of worthlessness and your idea that baby makes the final picture.....this answer is telling you to wake up from that and attend to whats here and now.


For IVF.....mmm looks okay though19.3 generally doesn't come to anything....yet hex 5 and 19.5 say you may well be waiting for a little one if you try this.


You know what I think Yi is actually saying "maybe, maybe not" Yi doesn't know if you are going to conceive. 19.3.5>5 to me suggests you may do....but who knows. The 63.6 is no final judgement here either its just telling you to stop seeing this as the end of some kind of story...it isn't...be here now. Yi doesn't know, even nature doesn't know if you will conceive...but to me anyway it doesn't look like a total 'no' there's still a 'maybe' IMO, so in your shoes with these answers I wouldn't give up hope but try to lose the desperation,

Babies often seem to have the habit of sneaking in when you aren't looking...you must have heard that before.
 

Trojina

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Actually Veronica I thought I recognised you and recalled you already have a son don't you...looking back at previous threads I see you have

In the light of this my interpretation may not be so relevant becasue I was assuming you hadn't yet had children.

I think you have had some very relevant answers,,,,,in particular n63.6 warns against you seeing your current situation as final....the journey isn't over yet. Having already had children is wanting one so much now something to do with wanting to secure the relationship ? Forgive me if that is an assumption but if it is then the answers are even more relevant aren't they ? I wondered if you were afraid the relationship wasn't strong enough by itself...or maybe its just your husbands expectations you want to fulfill.


I guess my perspective is quite different so I may not understand yours. As much as I like babies, and i do like them, I don't think the world is short on them so see no urgent need to provide more...and if you already had kids why the urgency. The world is already over populated isn't it.
 
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veronica

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Hello Troyan and many thanks for your input, much appreciated. Firstly, the Prozac comment was definitely a joke :) (as tempting as it is sometimes :). The way I would like to view 63.6, with the help of your input, that its a warning against accepting the doctors diagnosis as final, which would have serious implications, eg. Giving up trying to conceive naturally, waiting to get results through IVF (and the Yi warns here against taking the easy route I believe). My idea of fulfilment has always been to have a large family, I have always wanted more children but it just never happened so far. Yes I do have a son from a previous relationship. I don't feel that without a child with my husband the marriage is not strong enough as we do love each other dearly. It is that love which dictates that I would like to have a child with him as I know he would love that. I just hope it is not too late. I really hope that this is not what the Yi is saying through 63.6. I really do.
 

Trojina

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I just hope it is not too late. I really hope that this is not what the Yi is saying through 63.6. I really do.


I don't think Yi is saying that...it isn't afterall really the meaning of the line. Its much more like the idea one has 'arrived' is false. There are certainly other ways for Yi to say its too late 24.6 for example. Disregard me mentioning that earlier because on reflection it actually doesn't mean that. I think your own interpretation of 63.6 in your last post is good.

Good luck...but I think I still stand by what I said about your self worth, how its made you feel unsexy etc maybe you have to work on feeling good about yourself a little bit

Let us know if you succeed ! :)
 

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