Reason for staying with someone 58.5.> 54

[joeguiguren]

Hello my name is Josefina I live in South America, and my passion is throughing the yiing my grandmother was the one who taught it to me, but im stuck right now and was wondering if any of you beautiful talented readers out there could help me with this question.

Of course its about a relationship .. One of three years ... I want to leave i want to go and work in NYC with my sister for a while but I feel im here cause of him, I just ask a question I never asked before ...

Is there a reason i should stay with p?

I got 58.5. > 54

Not good but I cant seem to apply it to my specific question... Anyone?

Gracias

 

[foxx777]

Hi, welcome!

Oh, dear - most renditions of the I Ching have 58 (Joy, Exchange, lakes resting upon eachother) have line 5 as very bad:

"You place your trust in one who would injure you." or "Degenerating exchange is injurious"

However, there is the Berkers translation and commentary which reads:

"Trust that the degeneration can be rectified and healed".

So this is a different interpretation.

Hexagram 54 , Marrying Maiden, is about adaptation in an inferior or disadvantaged position. You will need to decide if the deterioration can be healed, if you are willing to adapt, or if you would leave for NYC and your sister.

It asks you to view transitory things in the light of eternity and the overarching. It might even be saying that you could marry him and adapt. But that this would have serious disadvantages, as you already seem to know after 3 years...

You could always ask, "What is the potential for leaving for NYC?", or what the potential is for staying, but you have more or less asked this. And it does not seem, taken as a whole, that there is much point in staying. But in the end, you must decide this.

In any case, hope I helped a tad bit.

 

[dragona]

Hola,
is he dominating you? Line 5 looks like saying "it is all good if you don`t stir the water"..maybe the question is put back at you to weight the odds...are you ok staying in familiar surroundings or you feel oppressed with your hole situation enough to leave no matter the consequence?

 

[joeguiguren]

Oh my! I know I feel I should just run as fast as I can, but something stops me... I wish nothing stopped me. But yes he is dominating and I dont think its in my nature to wait and put myself aside until he figures things out? Anyway its not easy as nothing is ... But I am so thankful for your commenta thank you... Blessings

 

[joeguiguren]

Oh and by the way I asked the Iching what does he feel for me? I NEVER ask this but couldnt help myself because of the last answer iching gave me..
21.1.4 > 23 ??
Im getting more confused ..... Help
Saludos

 

[Trojina]

Hello my name is Josefina I live in South America, and my passion is throughing the yiing my grandmother was the one who taught it to me, but im stuck right now and was wondering if any of you beautiful talented readers out there could help me with this question.

Of course its about a relationship .. One of three years ... I want to leave i want to go and work in NYC with my sister for a while but I feel im here cause of him, I just ask a question I never asked before ...

Is there a reason i should stay with p?
I got 58.5. > 54

Not good but I cant seem to apply it to my specific question... Anyone?

Gracias

No. Don't put faith where it doesn't belong. Its a pretty clear answer. Certainly doesn't counsel you to stay and place more faith here.

 

[dragona]

Can`t tell what text you use for interpretation but LiSe seems to me to the point here:
Biting Through - having a decision to make
Initial 9 : Shoes are foot-fetters, extinguishing the toes. Without fault.
Prevailing views prohibit your own way of moving. Find your own ideas, however crazy. It is the only way to lead your own life and to find all the creativity and happiness life can yield.
I think this speaks directly to you.
9 at 4: Biting dried-out meat with the bone. Acquiring a metal arrow head. Harvest: a difficulties' determination. Auspicious.
Only when one goes to the bottom of things, one finds the causes of trouble. Nobody likes to go there, finding problems which are difficult to solve. But it is the only way to make things work really good.
I think this is about the two of you and the need to re-examine the relationship, go to the essentials of it. This you have to work out and the move or stay will become clear.
Or at least, that is how I see it.

 

[joeguiguren]

Thank you ... Dragona, and trojan it is true what Dragon says we have to examine better this relationship and all else will be clear.

 

[dragona]

And may I just add..if you write something as serious as this

Oh my! I know I feel I should just run as fast as I can, but something stops me...

and you say you have a possibility to go away for a while and use work as an excuse (if must have one...) then, by all means, separation could only help you see things more clearly from the distance.
Again, only my take as I don`t know nearly enough
Good luck, d.

 

[Trojina]

Thank you ... Dragona, and trojan it is true what Dragon says we have to examine better this relationship and all else will be clear.

well I guess its obvious you are examining it or you wouldn't ask the question would you.

58.5 shows someone trying to make something work, with the best of intentions but there is no real sincerity returned and as the line says 'it is dangerous to place faith in matters which are disintegrating"

Maybe its something else thats disintegrating that you are trying to put faith in (?)...but as your question was 'is there reason to stay ?' I don't think its encouraging you to look for good reasons to stay I think its asking you to really check whats true and real for you and not settle for any less than that by trying to imagine someones feelings are more genuine than they are


Could be the wish to go and work in NYC is the thing you trust in that you should not trust in ? I think you have to figure out where you are placing faith where it is better that you do not place faith.

 

[dragona]

I think both cast were referring to YOU, to go to the basics of the relationship, examine your true feelings and when you do that, you will know what to do...looks like it is primarily your job as I get the feeling some topics are not opened for discussion..make your own decisions, stand upon your own feet.

 

[ginnie]

In Hilary's I Ching, she asks under 58.5 if you are surrendering your control and autonomy to someone who is unreliable or who might hurt you. What is good in the relationship seems to be in the process of crumbling away or deteriorating, as people have said. Yet, at the same time, the closer we are to someone, the better chance we have to be a positive influence and change things for the better. But we need to be realistic at the same time. Does he want to change? Does he understand that he is a domineering person who needs to change?