Relationship Question 59.9 - 29

[brassfeather]

Relationship Question 59.6 - 29

Hi everyone,

I've been with my boyfriend for about six months, and I've been really happy the whole time. At the beginning of our relationship, I could tell that he cared about me a lot, maybe even too much. I was reserved and guarded in the beginning, but my feelings have grown a lot since then. I've never been happier in a relationship.

Anyway, I'm not sure why I'm worried. I guess it's because I care so much and am afraid he'll hurt me. He still calls me things like beautiful and lovely. He's even mentioned future plans, like traveling together and things like that.

I asked "How does he feel about me?" and got 59.6 to 29

I'm so confused, because I thought things were fine. Should I be worried?

 

[mryou1]

"if it ain't broke, don't fix it"

If you really felt the relationship was good, then there was no reason to ask. I think what the I Ching's telling you is that, to a certain extent, you're guarded and withholding, and your boyfriend feels (in some ways) like his prescence changes nothing, you don't open up to him enough. I get this from the top line changing, but not effecting the major structure, and especially the inner trigram of "danger".

I could always be wrong though, but sometimes the I Ching means to startle you.

 

[foxx777]

59. Dissolving

Line 6:

Scattering one's blood.
Leaving to go far away.
Without fault.

Leaving a harmful situation, so as to get to safety. It is not wrong to do so.

I think the I Ching is indeed trying to startle you. It is saying, "Well, why don't you just leave before he hurts you, rather than trying to make things better?" I think it would be better to strengthen what you have, and not let your fears get the better of you. Why don't you ask, "How can I strengthen my relationship?" ?

 

[Trojina]

I think Yi could be saying simply 'distance yourself from these alarming thoughts'

In 59.6 theres something pretty threatening to get away from...at least it is experienced as threatening. I somehow doubt he experiences you as such...so I think it more likley it asks you to disperse scary thoughts..often described in Yi as 'blood' or emotional pain is often indicated by 'blood'. I see it as the opposite of 'Yi is trying to startle you'.....though it might be. Who knows it would be clearer to ask about what you need to do in the relationship


As I and some others say to the point of complete tedium Yi most often gives you your answer...its not really primarily there to give you inside view on his feelings. The only path you tread is yours....so your questions are most often going to be answered re your position. In showing your position of course it also inadvertently gives an idea of the others feelings sometimes anyway

Obvioulsy thisis not any kind of rule, there are times we clearly do see others view but I think in the main be very aware answers may be directed at you

If you want his feelings talk to him...strangers on the internet really don't know better than him

 

[Trojina]

If you haven't already seen this link it may be helpful on relationship questions in general

http://www.onlineclarity.co.uk/friends/showthread.php?t=12642

Look under the heading 'not so helpful questions' to see how you might get clearer answers to your question

 

[ginnie]

I agree with Trojan, who said, "Distance yourself from these alarming thoughts." You are strong enough to do so.

 

[brassfeather]

Thanks for all your feedback. I think I understand the I Ching a little better now, and I'll try to keep these lessons in mind with future readings.

By the way, I did ask what I could do to strengthen our relationship and received 15.3 --> 2.

I think it's telling me to leave behind fear or embarrassment, and stop guarding my feelings as I have been.

 

[foxx777]

Thanks for all your feedback. I think I understand the I Ching a little better now, and I'll try to keep these lessons in mind with future readings.

By the way, I did ask what I could do to strengthen our relationship and received 15.3 --> 2.

I think it's telling me to leave behind fear or embarrassment, and stop guarding my feelings as I have been.

I think you are right!